


Third Time's a Charm

by rubeanddodo



Category: Gone With the Wind - Margaret Mitchell
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-09
Updated: 2014-11-11
Packaged: 2018-01-15 02:08:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 75,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1287244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rubeanddodo/pseuds/rubeanddodo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The honeymoon of Scarlett and Rhett is remodeled.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Wedding is Announced

_**This story was started years ago, it was the second ff I attempted and I would like to think one can read improvement in my writing style with the successive chapters . They definitely got longer, ha ha. This has been and always will be the story I hold dearest. A number of lovely ladies beta'd some of the chapters for me and I want to thank them for their kindness, sharp eyes, help and encouragement. Cheers to you Alica, Black Cat, Isolabella, Blueneak, and DreamGWTW. I can never thank you enough.** _

_**I hope you enjoy it.** _

_**The first few lines come directly from that book that none of us seem to be able to put down.** _

 

  
  


**Prologue**

Aren't you going to kiss me good-by? she whispered

Don't you think you've had enough kissing for one evening?

Oh you are impossible and I don't care if you never come back

But I will come back

Scarlett flew up the stairs in such a state of agitation. She did want him to come back and she did want more of his kisses. He was right, no one, not even Ashley, had kissed her like that. She couldn't understand what had happened to her but she did know she wanted many more kisses.

"Dear Lord, I said I'd marry him! How did that happen? It's like my mind doesn't work properly when he is around. Oh, I should have told him to go to Halifax! But then maybe he would have. Oh what shall I do, I've said I'd marry him but he did promise me fun, I wonder what fun it will be, fun for him or fun for me? Well, I won't think about that now. Oh but what about our wedding.. It will be the most beautiful, most talked about wedding Atlanta has ever seen, and everyone will be pea green with envy!"

  
  


_**A WEDDING IS ANNOUNCED** _

Scarlett wanted a large, extravagant wedding with all the people in attendance that had ever snubbed her, been mean to her or had tried to make her feel low. She wanted to rub their noses in how well she had done and how rich she was now to be. Yet her third wedding was a quiet affair.

A number of factors came in to it. Probably the main one was the fact that Rufus Bullock was now Governor of Georgia. He had been elected with the votes of Carpetbaggers, Scallywags and newly freed slaves, who voted time and again, being put on trains to move from one district to another, to cast their ballots the way their new Yankee friends told them.

Native Georgians who had fought in the War, aided the Confederacy during the War or owned slaves before the War were not allowed to vote, and this rankled.

One of the first things Bullock did when elected was to extend Military Rule. As if Georgia hadn't enough of Yankees flocking to her desecrated state!

And everyone knew that Rhett Butler was a known friend and associate of Bullock.

Though he had saved their menfolk from the hangman's noose, the way he had arranged it was to make a mockery of all of them! As if any of their gentlemen would have entered a house like that of Belle Watling's and for the story to be put out that their darling husbands went there on a weekly basis. It was incorrigible of him! That Rhett Butler, Scallywag and War Profiteer, had made all of the Old Guard a joke to those nasty Northerners. There was no doubt what a chuckle he had at their expense. It made one want to squirm.

Some may have felt a some sort of pity for Scarlett or a sense of compassion to Ellen O'Hara's daughter but after her behaviour with her businesses, a saloon no less, and the deaths of Atlanta's native sons, Frank Kennedy and poor crippled Tommy Wellburn, who had fought so bravely during the War and even though crippled was making his way in the world. It was common knowledge this was all her fault, flaunting herself about the town, driving herself to those lumber mills. Well, she had brought down the name of Southern Womanhood! Why she, a Native Georgian girl, even consorted with Yankee women! It was too much to bear. And none of the fair ladies of Atlanta would put up with it nor go to such an unholy union of bad lots!

Then there were Melly's quiet words of "Maybe now is not the best time for a large party. All you really need to have is a priest, two witnesses and a man who loves you to be married." to which Scarlett bit her tongue.

Melly was followed by Rhett's sneering laughter of "Why do you need a big wedding to show the world how in love you are?" which made Scarlett bite her tongue so hard she thought she had drawn blood!

And finally, Mammy's closed mouthed mutterings of "Mules, just mules." and "Miz Ellen's most likely rolling in her grave." gave Scarlett no choice but to accept the fact her third wedding was to be a family only affair in Aunt Pittypat's parlour.

Aunt PittyPat herself decided at the last minute she could not possibly attend (which may have been because she had had tea with the Missus Elsing, Meade and Merriweather, the day previous to the wedding.) Instead Pitty Pat Hamilton, with many tears, took to her bed with her swoon bottle.

Scarlett's childhood dreams of a large church wedding with her wearing a beautiful, beaded, satin gown with a long flowing train carried by sweet faced children, walking down the aisle on darling Pa's arm, seeing all the congregation smiling at her and whispering how they had never seen a more beautiful bride, her Mother dabbing her eyes with pride at her eldest child, was not to be.

The day was not as in her dream, but Scarlett did look lovely in her simple, pale peach gown. She followed Melly into the parlour and no one noticed her bouquet quivering as she tried to calm her nerves.

Rhett, as handsome as always in his perfectly tailored black broadcloth, seemed to have an added sparkle in his eye. One would never have thought him a nervous bridegroom. His "I do" was firmly said, which brought a smile and a tear to Melly, knowing that her sister was lucky to have a man that loved her as much as Ashley did she.

After the gentle kiss Rhett was granted by the priest, the guests adjourned to the dining room for the toasts and a sumptuous wedding breakfast.

Uncle Henry came up to Scarlett and giving her a dry peck on the cheek said, "I hope you know what you are doing, Scarlett."

Scarlett flashed a sweet belle smile and answered, "Why, I don't know what you mean, Uncle Henry?"

"Yes you do and don't bother playing the simple girl with me. You are in for a world of trouble with this man but he obviously cares for you and your children. Just watch out."

Though Scarlett's anger rose, her smile grew larger. "Why thank you so much Uncle, for worrying so about me but I do know what I'm doing. Now where is Rhett? I'm not a bride for five minutes and my husband is gone."

Rhett was busy himself. After accepting the stiff congratulations from Ashley Wilkes and the heartfelt wishes for a long and happy marriage from Miss Melly, he turned to his mother and his little sister Rosemary.

"All my blessings to you, my dear son. Scarlett is beautiful and I can see how happy she makes you." said Lydia Butler.

"Thank you mother. And thank you for making the trip here. It means a lot to me."

Pinching Rosemary on the cheek, Rhett said " I imagine you will be next, little sister. Just don't wait as long as me. Excuse me for a minute, won't you?"

Making his way through the few guests, stopping long enough to tickle Wade and give Ella a kiss, Rhett made his way to the kitchen to finally let out the laughter and joy he had wanted to shout when Scarlett had said "I do".

She was really his now. She, the woman who had haunted his dreams, driven him mad with desire, and changed the course of his life, was his wife!

He pulled out his wallet and starting handing out bills to the servants. Uncle Peter receiving five dollars, bowed his head and said a solemn thank you, Prissy shrieked over her gift of two dollars, Cookie took her four dollars as her due for the wonderful wedding breakfast and finally for Mammy, ten dollars in gold.

"No suh. Thank you, no. I am no free issue nigger and I don't need your money." Mammy looked him straight in his eye, never blinking.

Rhett wavered, debating whether he should try to force her to take the money. He knew she was going to be the hardest to break through and win over. She reminded him a lot of Old Aunt Sue, his mammy.

"I accept what you say, Mammy. I just hope one day I will be worthy of your respect." Rhett bowed low and made his way to the dining room to mingle with the wedding guests and to await his bride.

  
  


**And so the story begins. I hope you want to continue on the ride.**

 

 


	2. LOVE IS THE QUEST, MARRIAGE IS THE CONQUEST

_**CHAPTER 2 -** _

_**LOVE IS THE QUEST, MARRIAGE IS THE CONQUEST**_

_**-** _ _**Helen Rowland** _

 

 

 

The day had been a long one for both of them. They were late leaving, what with Aunt Pitty unsteadily giving her belated congratulations with many tears and smelling salts, and then Scarlett losing her new wedding ring, which was finally found in her glove. Through out, Rhett kept a smile on his face and a gentleness in his voice.

The newly married couple only just made the train, which then became delayed outside Atlanta due to a cow on the tracks, and then they had to quickly clammer on board the steam boat to New Orleans. Making their way to their cabin, they separated to bathe and dress for dinner.

"Scarlett, the dinner bell chimed five minutes ago, are you nearly ready?"

Scarlett opened her dressing room door, said "Yes, I think I am ready."

Rhett breathed in deeply. Scarlett emerged wearing a beautiful jade green silk gown which clung to her figure. The colour made her eyes seem that much deeper green, her skin a rosy pink and her form, something any man would kill to hold. "I compliment you on your gown. You look lovely" Rhett bowed deeply to her.

Curtsying towards him, Scarlett said "Why thank you Rhett. A lady can never get too many compliments. And you scrub up quite well yourself." Scarlett made her dimples deepen, knowing how that could make a man smile. Taking his arm, they made their way along the passageway.

The dining room was decorated with deep red velvet and gold leaf trim, the small quartet played soft airs and the food looked sumptuous but was largely untasted by either Scarlett or Rhett.

Each tried to make conversation.

"It is a lovely boat, Rhett, what is it's name?"

"A ship is always a she, Scarlett."

"What do you mean, a she?"

"I mean that a ship or a boat is always referred to in the female sense, they have female names and are referred to as her or she. For ships are much like women, they are temperamental, unpredictable and expensive. And it takes a experienced man to handle her correctly."

"The ceremony went well, don't you think, my dear? I wouldn't know but I bow to your previous knowledge of how these things work."

"Well, yes I guess, but the priest, what was his name..?"

"Father Simon."

"Well he didn't really seem very lively, and didn't he seemed to stumble a bit on your name?"

"He probably thought that it was the devil's own name."

They had both became quiet, each lost in their own thoughts.

Scarlett had a worried look on her face, her eyes downcast, a small furrow on her brow. Her thoughts were of what Rhett would expect from her that night.

And for Rhett, his thoughts were as nervous as Scarlett's. "How have I come to this place - A married man, me! And to a woman that I love to distraction but is only 'fond of me'! How the mighty have fallen." His mouth turned up into a sneer. Mostly at the whole situation but partly at his own foolishness.

"Shall we retire to our cabin, my pet?" Rhett softly said.

"What, oh yes, I am tired now."

"I am sure you are," Rhett drawled, making Scarlett question whether he knew what she was thinking.

"Well, you see, I didn't get much sleep last night..."

"Oh no doubt due to nerves or was it anticipation?"

Rhett had a wicked twinkle in his eye as he led Scarlett from the dining room to their bridal cabin.

Arriving at their cabin, Rhett gave Scarlett time to prepare herself for bed, by going out on deck to have a cigar. Scarlett, with much anxiety, changed out of her gown into her night dress of white lawn and lace. She was nervous as a cat, knowing that Rhett was not a man to be dissuaded by lies of headaches or female problems. But also she was anxious for a kiss like the one he had given her when he had proposed. That kiss that made her world turn.

Nervously, she crawled into the cool sheets and lay board stiff, waiting... Finally Rhett came in dressed in a long black silk robe. Cracking open her eyes, Scarlett watched as he turned down the gas lights and removed his robe. Gently slipping under the covers, Rhett put his arm round Scarlett, who

started at his touch.

"Sshh, my pet. We are both tired. Just sleep now. We have a life ahead of us." Rhett whispered.

Soon Scarlett heard his breath become deeper and she finally relaxed, letting go of the tension she had held all day. Listening to the rhythmic sound of the paddlewheel as it made their way South, Scarlett let out a deep sigh.

"He really is kind to me." was the last thing she thought before sleep finally overcame her.

Scarlett slowly became aware of a tickling on her face, she tried to wave it off but then she smelt coffee, ah it was so hard to sleep, smelling it call to her. Slowly, she opened her eyes. The light was different somehow, where was she? Focussing a bit, she saw Rhett sitting beside her on the bed. Shaved, dressed and smiling.

"Good Morning, Sleeping Beauty"

"Um.." grunted Scarlett.

"I have gotten you breakfast. Would you like to sit up for your juice?"

Umm, yes." garbled Scarlett.

Slowly rising up, Scarlett looked about at the luxurious cabin with sleepy half opened eyes, taking in the beautiful furnishings that she had ignored last night.

Having a sip of her juice Scarlett sighed, "Oh this is nice."

Rhett laughed "Is this how you always wake up?"

Scarlett's eyes popped open and her mind cleared away the sleep. "My Lord, I'm married again and to Rhett! How did this all happen?"

Sneaking a peak up, she smiled, for Rhett had her coffee cup in hand.

"Yes, I would like to wake up every day like this, thank you."

"And so you shall, my pet. Did you sleep well?'

Oh yes Rhett. it was delicious. This bed is so comfortable! Did you? Sleep well, I mean?"

"Yes, Scarlett. Though I had a heavy load on my chest.

"What do you mean?"

"Only I had the delight of you sleeping close to me." Rhett's eyes were alive and sparkling.

"Oh, I am sorry, did I bother you, I didn't know, didn't realize..I'm..

""Ssshh" Rhett touched his fingers to her lips. "I liked it."

"Well, I..." Scarlett stammered.

Rhett looked into her eyes and somehow Scarlett could not look away, could not even breathe...

Rhett bent down and softly kissed her lips. "Good Morning, Mrs. Butler."

Scarlett's mind was swirling, she didn't know what or even how to think. Rhett's kiss was not like any she had received before. His lips became more insistent, more persistent as did hers. It was if she would never get enough of them. Then Rhett's tongue started to press against her mouth, forcing her lips to open and her own tongue started to dance with his, deepening the kiss.

Scarlett started to quiver. "This isn't right. It's daytime. I'm not meant to, not supposed to but I'm.." Her thoughts were like a whirlwind, never stopping long enough to complete.

Rhett lay beside her, stroking her hair, her face and Scarlett rose up to meet him, wanting him but frightened of this feeling in her.

Slowly, sensuously, Rhett brought his kisses to her throat, making her pulse leap. His hands firmly touched her body. Her virginal night gown was slipping down as Rhett's mouth moved lower. His lips touched her breast, slowly, languidly, following the rise from her cleavage to her nipple, sending shocks up her spine and deep in her belly.

Never had any man, not Charles nor Frank done this to her. Made her feel this way. What was it she was feeling?

"Oh Rhett." Scarlett whispered. "I don't..."

"It's alright Scarlett. I won't hurt you. Don't be afraid." Rhett murmured.

And Scarlett believed him, trusted him.

Without knowing how, Scarlett found Rhett was completely undressed and in the bed, holding her. Never had Scarlett felt naked, warm skin against her own nakedness, she could feel the coarse hair of his legs rubbing against her smoothness, she smelt his scent, the scent of a man, she felt his rough hands touching her places no one else had ever touched. And she delighted in it. Her mind was flying,"This isn't right. I'm not supposed to like this, what is wrong with me, I am wicked!" but she couldn't stop the desire she felt, the desire for something that she didn't know, had never known.

"Let go, Scarlett. Enjoy yourself." Rhett crooned in her ear.

And without thinking anymore, Scarlett gave herself up to him, holding him, stroking him and pressing her need back to him.

"Scarlett...Scarlett...It's time to wake up...it's past time."

"Hmmm" Scarlett fluttered her eyes open.

Rhett was looking closely at her.

Suddenly Scarlett remembered where she was and what had happened, she felt her face getting warm as the blush coloured her cheeks.

Looking down, her inky lashes fanning over her upper cheeks, Scarlett softly said," Good Morning,Rhett."

Rhett chuckled, "Good Morning? It's now two thirty in the afternoon! You were tired, weren't you?"

"Well, yes and this bed is so comfortable. It's like sleeping on a cloud.". Scarlett gazed up at her new husband, a small smile pulling at her lips.

"I'm glad you like it and maybe you like the company too." Rhett had a smile on his face but his eyes had a questioning look to them.

This just made Scarlett's blush even pinker but she held his gaze.

"Yes, I mean, well yes..." Scarlett stammered "Um, is lunch still being served?"

Rhett laughed out loud. "For Mrs. Butler, of course! Anything you want, Scarlett, is yours. Don't ever hesitate to ask me and I will get it for you...Anything in my power." He looked deeply into her eyes. "Anything.".

  


 


	3. LOVE IS ONE OF THE HARDEST WORDS TO SAY

**CHAPTER 3**

**LOVE IS ONE OF THE HARDEST WORDS TO SAY**

 

 

 

And Rhett was true to his word. He did give Scarlett anything she asked for, as long as he approved of it. The false curls she bought to accent her dead straight hair, he burnt. The gowns with too many frills and ruffles, he refused. But his taste for women's apparel was sharp. He had an unerring eye for what suited Scarlett's colouring and contours. She now had gowns for every occasion, day dresses, evening gowns, stay at home dresses, Sunday best dresses. They were made from the best satins, rustling taffetas, simple cotton, fine lawn and watered silk. And with the gowns Rhett also bought the accessories, gloves of soft kid, darling hats that seemed to perch on her hair, shoes with high heels, boots of the finest leather.

The beautiful silk and delicate lace lingerie made by the nuns of St. Ursuline, he insisted on having Scarlett model for him. She did this with a blush on her cheeks but also with a smile on her lips, knowing how nice her figure was, even after having two children. Her waist was still smaller than most and her breasts were firm. She revelled in Rhett's admiration of her body.

New Orleans was a whirlwind of shopping, dancing, restaurants, carriage rides, plays and more shopping.

In the mornings, Scarlett never knew what to expect. Somedays Rhett would slowly kiss her awake, other days he would throw off her covers and jump on the bed until she was bounced onto the floor. He would choose the outfits for her to wear each day, brush her long black hair, giving small kisses down her neck as he did so, lovingly scrub her back in sweet scented baths he had drawn for her. He would tease her terrible taste in clothes, make up outrageous lies about how there were alligators in the lobby, swear a blue streak just to see her blush and then grab her tightly and laugh at her discomfort. He would pat her and pet her, pinch her and give her deep kisses that made it hard for her to breathe. But he was always watching her. Sometimes she would catch him looking at her in a way she could not understand, it was if he wanted, well she couldn't think what, but something.

"What are you looking at Rhett? Have I gone green or something?"

Rhett would quickly mask his face. "No my pet, you have not gone green, but you will look green if you decide to buy that colour of gown!"

One day, after a long afternoon of buying presents for everyone in Atlanta, Rhett asked, "And what have you decided to give Mammy?"

"Nothing! " Scarlett firmly said. She then told Rhett about Mammy's mutterings about mules and horses and Mother rolling in her grave.

To Scarlett's surprise, Rhett laughed long and hard.

"But she doesn't deserve anything." Scarlett protested.

Rhett softly said "Yes she does. She more than anyone. She is one of the few that has always been with you, stood by you, and even knowing what you are truly like, she has always loved you."

"Well, what's not to love about me?" Scarlett flirted.

"Well my dear, I don't have time enough in my life to tell you." Rhett chuckled.

Scarlett started an angry retort but Rhett hushed her. 'I know exactly what to buy her. A red petticoat just like my mammy always wanted. It will be a present from me, a sort of peace offering to her. "

"Well, I still say she doesn't deserve anything and she won't take it."

"Yes, I am sure you would say that. But nevertheless, I will buy it for her. And maybe one day she will accept the gift in the spite of the giver."

Since that first morning as man and wife, Scarlett was finding the marital bed much different than anything she had ever experienced.

This was not the hurried, painful way of Charles with all the accompanying embarrassment, nor the way of Frank with his much laboured breathing and Scarlett making shopping lists in her mind waiting for the revulsion to end.

Rhett had begun to carefully introduce her to the art of lovemaking. He taught her how her body responded to a certain touch or even a look when they were close. She started to relax into it and found she actually looked forward to their private times together. She no longer was thinking of it as a man's foolishness but beginning to understand that it could be enjoyable to both man and woman. Rhett seemed to know what made her pulse beat faster and where to place his lips to make her shiver with delight. She was beginning to loose her shyness and her reticence.

For Rhett, it was like having a virginal girl, whom he could bring the joy of discovery to. He always had a sense that Scarlett had a desire for passion, ever since overhearing that scene in the library at Twelve Oaks, so many years ago. If handled the right way, she would ultimately bring much to the marital bed. He knew with time and the proper technique, she would not only enjoy him but would actually crave lovemaking with him. Time and patience would bring him everything he had ever wanted from her. Scarlett giving her love and body to him but more importantly, desiring his body and his love. But still he did not give her all his love. Rhett would not, could not let loose his own desire for Scarlett. Things were still too young with them. One day, she would know how much he loved her but not yet. But when that day came, oh how he would make love to her then. Not just exciting her body but her soul. He would then give himself entirely to her. And she to him.

In the early hours before dawn after enjoying the delights of each others bodies, Rhett would hold Scarlett close as she cuddled into him. They told each other stories of their pasts.

"Rhett, who was the first girl you ever kissed?"

"Why it was you of course, my dear."

Scarlett gave him a poke in the ribs, "Who was it?".

"Ow! Alright, it was so long ago and your kisses have erased all previous ones in my mind but I do have a vague memory of a little blonde haired girl who was a year older than me. Her name was Josephine and she wouldn't let me go until I gave her a kiss. After quite a few minutes of trying to get away from the bear hug she had me in, I finally gave up and kissed her. Then I took my frog out of my pocket and put it down her dress."

Scarlett started to giggle.

"Don't laugh! My mother found out and I got a sound spanking for my ungentlemanly behaviour!"

"For the kiss or the frog?"

"Both, I think. Plus, I lost my favourite frog. Your turn, who was the lucky one who tasted your sweet lips for the first time?"

"Well, I was quite old, I think I was five or six.."

"Oh, ancient, practically an old maid!"

"Don't interrupt. And it was on a dare. Brent Tarleton doubled dared me to give Stuart a kiss. He said I was too chicken and I hated to be called chicken, so I kissed Stuart. I think they had worked this out between themselves though, because the next day Stuart double dared me to kiss Brent."

"And what did you do?"

' Why kissed him of course! It was a double dare after all!"

Rhett laughed out loud. " Well at least I know how to get you to do things now. I'll just doubledare you, my little chicken!"

Scarlett bloomed again in New Orleans. She laughed and flirted, she felt as if she once again was the belle of the county. Her cheeks filled out and her eyes lost their hungry look. How she loved the city of New Orleans. The men were so handsome and the ladies had a charm that even Scarlett had to acknowledge. She also noticed how these women's eyes would flutter and their bosoms heave when Rhett would bow and kiss their hands.

"Why, he is a handsome thing, isn't he?" Scarlett had never really paid much mind to Rhett's looks before, but on reflection, she realized that he was a very good looking man and that made her feel even better about the fact that he was her husband.

Scarlett quickly learned the word "enchante" from the men who begged to dance with her. And though they may have held her a bit tighter in a waltz than was considered proper, Rhett was always quick to pat the man on the shoulder and claim Scarlett as his own.

Scarlett could always feel his eyes on her and knew that he was making sure she was happy.

New Orleans was nothing like Atlanta! There didn't seem to be anyone who was sad or pinched faced. Everyone just wanted to laugh and dance and drink.

One night, after a few too many dances and a few too many glasses of champagne, Rhett escorted Scarlett home in an open carriage. Scarlett was as bubbly as the champagne and she burst into song.

After two verses of Peg of My Heart, they arrived at their hotel. Rhett laughingly suggested that she may want to finish her solo another time. Scarlett giggled and attempted to walk up the stairs to the lobby but somehow her dancing feet wouldn't work properly. Smiling, Rhett swept her up into his arms and whispered, " I think it may be quicker if I just carry you to our suite, my pet."

Feeling his heart beating as his warm arms held her, Scarlett felt safe and cared for.

Depositing Scarlett gently on their bed, Rhett gazed down at his beautiful green eyed wife. Scarlett tried to focus on his eyes but there seemed to be two of Rhett swimming in front of her.

"Mmmm Rhett, kiss me please."

As her wish was his command, Rhett lowered his lips to her upturned mouth.

"Oh Rhett." Scarlett murmured, "You spoil me so. I think I could fall in love with you."

A yawn overcame her and her eyes closed.

Rhett waited for her to speak again, his eyes alert and his body tense but realizing she was fast asleep, slowly, gently he undressed Scarlett and tucked her under the covers.

That night, Rhett did not sleep in bed but instead sat in the arm chair by the window, alternating his gaze out the window to the streets of the Quarter and the delightful, distracting, infuriating woman lying curled up in his bed. He nursed a brandy and smoked a number of cheroots. His eyes showed a man in turmoil. Anxious, happy, desperate.

As the pinkness of dawn lightened the sky, Rhett undressed and slid under the covers.

Gathering the petite body of Scarlett into his arms, he held her tightly, softly whispering into her fragrant hair, more to himself that to her, all his hopes and fears.

Finally, he gave into sleep but with a smile on his lips and a sense of victory about to be achieved.

 


	4. "ONE OF THE HARDEST THINGS IN LIFE IS WATCHING THE PERSON YOU LOVE, LOVE SOMEONE ELSE.”

****CHAPTER 4** **

****"ONE OF THE HARDEST THINGS IN LIFE IS WATCHING THE PERSON YOU LOVE, LOVE SOMEONE ELSE.” Unknown** **

Rhett sat on the edge of the bed, gazing down at the beauty that was his wife. She was so lovely, her black hair spilling round the white sheets, her long, thick eyelashes gracing her cheeks, her luscious red lips, soft and so delightfully kissable. She slept as greedily as she ate. Taking all the bed up, luxuriating in the softness and comfort. It had been too long since she she had felt such comfort or any softness in her life, he knew that. But all that would change now. He was going to make sure of it.

" Scarlett... " Rhett cooed softly. "Open those bewitching green eyes, Scarlett... Wake up darling. I have a present for you."

Scarlett heard Rhett's voice and felt him stroking her cheek. She didn't want to open her eyes, she just wanted to sleep. She groaned, the light seemed so bright and hurt her head. "Oh Rhett, I don't feel well. My head is pounding. I think I ate something bad."

Rhett smirked. "You, my little songbird, aren't feeling well because you have what is crassly known as a hangover. Here, drink some water."

Slowly, painfully Scarlet cracked open her eyes to see Rhett gazing down at her, a spark in his eye, and holding a glass of ice cold water.

"What do you mean, songbird? What are you talking about now? Oh Lord... what did I do? Everything is a bit of a blur." Scarlett thirstily drank down the sweet water, assuaging her dry mouth.

"Finish your water. It will help.." Rhett passed her a cup and saucer, " Now my girl ,how about some coffee to take the pain away?"

"Ah, I do love the coffee here. " Scarlett slowly savoured the heavenly smell and taste of the chicory coffee with heavy cream . "I do believe I am beginning to feel like myself again. Thank you. So Rhett, did you say something about a present?" Scarlett smiled sweetly, making sure to show her dimples, and letting her eyes twinkle at Rhett.

"I knew that would be one of the best ways to rouse you from the arms of Morpheus."

"Who is Morpheus, is he someone I danced with last night?"

Rhett laughed out loud.

"Stop it Rhett. Stop laughing at me, you are so mean! Now is there a present or not? I think I'm feeling sleepy again." Scarlett faked a large yawn.

'Yes, my greedy girl." Rhett passed her tissue wrapped box. " Here you are. Happy Anniversary! We have been married ten days so I thought we should celebrate the fact you aren't a widow for the third time yet!"

Scarlett scowled at him but then started to giggle as she ripped off the red ribbon and white tissue paper.

"Oh I do love getting presents!"

Cracking open the velvet box under the tissue, she exclaimed, "Rhett, oh, they are exquisite! How beautiful! Where did you get them? I have never seen hair combs made from Mother of Pearl! Oh, and are those real diamonds?" Scarlett was wide awake now, her headache forgotten and her eyes were sparkling with joy.

"Yes, my dear, they are. I got them this morning at a small shop I know of here in the Quarter." Rhett's face was alive with as much joy as Scarlett's.

"You have already been out? What time is it?" Scarlett exclaimed. " Oh, it's after noon! You should have woken me earlier! I don't want to waste my honeymoon in bed!" Scarlett threw back the bed covers, revealing her tantalizing body barely concealed in her silk nightgown.

"Well, I can think of worse ways of wasting a honeymoon." Rhett drawled with that devil look in his eye. He lay his long legs down on the bed pulling her close to him.

"Oh, you know what I mean. I'm having such a good time and I wish it would never end but we're going home in less than three days." Scarlett made a pout. Enjoying the feeling of his strong arms pulling her towards him.

"How would you like to spend these last three days then honey? The idea of staying here in bed does sound appealing to me."

"Rhett, you are scandalous! " Scarlett twinkled at him. " How about you let me get dressed and then maybe you could take me to the shop where you went this morning? I would love to see it" .

" Ha, why does that not surprise me?" Rhett gave his most charming smile. " That's one of the things I like about you, Scarlett. You are never quite satisfied!".

"Never, Captain Butler, and don't you ever forget it." Wrapping her arms around his neck she raised her lips for one of those delicious kisses that Rhett did so well.

As it turned out it was Scarlett that bought a present for Rhett, a set of shirt studs and matching cufflinks made of silver and Mother of Pearl.

"Now we will be a matched pair." Scarlett said with a satisfied smile on her lips. The honeymoon couple were taking a stroll down by the great river, looking at the many ships bringing in cargo and shipping more out.

" I think we have been a match for a long time already, Mrs. Butler." Rhett responded.

"I'm still having to get used to being called that...Mrs. Butler."

"Is it that hard?" Rhett asked, clearly surprised that a name meant so much to Scarlett, after all she had so many of them already.

"Well, yes, to be honest."

Rhett looked closely at Scarlett, seeking out the truth from her eyes, but frightened of the answer.

"And why pray tell, my dear?"

" I guess I never imagined we'd ever be married." Scarlett started to frown in thought.

Why did you want to marry me, Rhett? I mean, you don't love me, do you?" She was still puzzling over the question as she had been ever since Rhett proposed to her. " So how was I able to get the famous Rhett Butler, he who said he was not the marrying kind, to take little ole me as his bride?" Scarlett batted her eyes at him, acting the belle.

Rhett paused for a minute then said, "What if I told you I was deeply in love with you and had been for years?"

Scarlett laughed, "Then I would send you to the corner and make you write out one hundred times, 'I will not tell lies to my wife'."

Rhett looked away from those eyes and out across the river. "Well I suppose I married you because, since the War ended, things have been a bit stale so I thought being married to you would give me a bit of the excitement life once held during the blockade days. I enjoy danger,you know, so who better for me to marry that Scarlett O'Hara Hamilton Kennedy?"

"Fiddle-dee-dee, Rhett. I'm not dangerous!"

"Tell that to all the young bucks whose hearts you have broken and to all their lady loves who wish they had half your looks and a quarter of your charm and then see how they respond."

And with a loud laugh from Rhett and a genuine smile from Scarlett, they continued on with their stroll along the riverside, arm in arm.

Though they were supposed to attend another ball that evening, Rhett had sent their regrets explaining "I don't want to share you with anyone tonight, Scarlett. I want you all to myself." So they enjoyed an intimate dinner in their suite. Over their coffee and brandy, Scarlett felt at peace. She was comfortable with Rhett.

"Happy, my pet?"

"Oh yes Rhett. So happy."

"And you are having fun, like I promised?"

"I wish it would never end."

Gazing at her, Rhett eyes started to burn into hers. "Come closer to me, Scarlett" Rhett drawled quietly.

"Why, Rhett?" Scarlett whispered loving the way his voice seemed like silk when he spoke her name.

"I want to fall into your eyes. Come here...come."

Scarlett moved into his warm embrace and lifted her lips to his. Their kiss was soft, loving, tentative at first. Slowly the kiss became more passionate, Rhett's lips firmer, more insistent. Scarlett responded and feeling somewhat daring touched her soft tongue to his lips.

"Hmm.." Rhett breathed against her. Kissing her neck, feeling her pulse beating hard. "Scarlett, so sweet, so...Scarlett, I... "

"Shall we..." Scarlett whispered, interrupting him.

"Shall we what, my dearest?"

'Well, you know Rhett" Scarlett was breathing rapidly and finding speech difficult.

"I think we should and so we shall." Rhett held her tightly to him as her he lifted her lovely body and carried her to the large bed. He lay her down on the softness, standing over her, his eyes burning into hers, he removed his jacket, slid off his cravat, and slowly, deliberately undid the silver and mother of pearl studs from his shirt front.

Scarlett eyes were burning as bright as his. She breathed in sharply as he removed his crisp, white shirt, revealing his broad shoulders, his chest heavy with black hair, that narrowed down to a thin line following down to below his belt buckle. Rhett chuckled. "Do you like what you see, my dear?" Scarlett could only respond with another quick breath. Rhett bent down and slowly removed Scarlett's dainty slippers, running his finger firmly along her instep. "Oh" murmured Scarlett. Rhett kept his eyes on her, watching her reaction to his touch. Slowly, oh so slowly, he moved his hand up her calf until he came to the top of her stocking. He gently pulled on the ribbon, releasing it's hold and rolled the stocking down. He turned to her other leg and repeated the process, once again moving with leisure. Scarlett already felt naked, with just the bareness of her legs. She started to blush, closing her eyes.

"Scarlett, look at me." Shyly, Scarlett opened her eyes. Rhett voice rumbled, "I want to see your eyes tonight. Please..."

Rhett with tenderness and desire, softly undressed Scarlett. He slowly undid buttons, untied ribbons and discarded the many pieces of material that clothed her. The whole time his hands stroked her, his lips caressed her, his voice whispered to her. And his eyes burned brightly into hers. Finally, Scarlett lay naked before him. Her skin glowed whiter than the linen she lay on, her black hair spilling over the pillows and her eyes dark as the forest, still open though slightly heavy with her desire for him. He leaned back and savoured the beauty of her.

" I have often dreamed of how you would look undressed, my sweet." Rhett whispered. " The reality outshines the fantasy."

Rhett discarded the rest of his clothes and gathered her softness tightly against his body. "Scarlett, my Scarlett..." he cooed lowly.

Later, with the lights dimmed and the moonlight shining over the bed, Scarlett lay cocooned in Rhett's strong arms. Her body felt delightfully sated and tired. Her mind was floating dreamily.

"I'm happy.'" She snuggled a bit closer into Rhett. " It's been so long since I have felt this way, I think I had forgotten what it was like, what it felt like to be truly happy." Scarlett let her mind wander. "When was the last time I felt this way?"

Her mind flowed aimlessly back to when she was sixteen. To before the War. How things were different then. All she had to worry about then was which dress was the most becoming on her, how many men called on her and who she gave the last waltz to on her dance card.

Scarlett thought of her Mother. She had such a quiet voice and soft manner. How was she able to stay so peaceful when so many wanted her attention? Did she never get tired of the demands made on her?

Scarlett's mind then saw her darling Pa, remembering his wild horse jumping, his spoiling of his daughters, his blustering bravado with the slaves yet his kind heart to all. And then Scarlett thought of his all consuming love and respect of his wife. What would it be like to have a husband that loved her so deeply, Scarlett wondered.

She then started to remember back to her beaux. So many young men dead and gone. They had such handsome looks and polished manners, yet they were like wild animals only barely tamed. The fire in their tempers were always so close to the surface. The Tarleton boys, Lafe Munroe, Raif Calvert, They were all so young, barely out of boyhood. What a waste. Didn't Rhett once say something about war being such a waste. It was after Gettysburg, when so many had died yet it wasn't the end, there were many more battles, many more dead men, more widows and fatherless children. And for what? The Yankees had won in the end and The South had been decimated.

She remembered back to how Tara had been before the War, the neatly planted fields, white with cotton, the rich red soil, the orderly fences, shady bridle paths, her mother's rose garden. The easy way of life in the County then. The beauty that was destroyed forever by Sherman.

And then Scarlett thought of how she had changed, she had hardened and become someone quite different from the belle of Clayton County. She no longer had the sweet bloom of youth or the innocence that Mother and Pa would keep her safe. Instead of worrying over the latest hairstyle or ballgown she had to worry over finding whatever way to feed her family, to keep her land for them, for there was no one else. She had to fight, scheme, steal and even kill. She had never had her mother's patience with people or her gentleness. She had too much O'Hara blood in her. That night at Rough and Ready had been the end of her girlhood and she had changed into what she feared was a hell cat, baring her claws at anyone that stood in her way.

A long sigh came from deep within her inner self.

Suddenly, she felt Rhett's arm stiffen and then he quickly moved himself away as if she was a fire that had burnt him. He rose from the bed.

"Damn you to Hell, Scarlett!"

"Rhett, what are you doing? What is wrong?"

"You're a fool, Scarlett and I don't have much time for fools."

"What are you talking about. What have I done wrong?"

But Rhett didn't answer. Grabbing his robe, he strode out the bedroom door, slamming it behind him.

Though expecting Rhett to return any minute and explain, when she heard the outer door slam, she realized he was gone. But why?

It was all too much, first the memories and now Rhett's strange behaviour. Scarlett felt the pain in her chest and the soreness in her throat and then she felt the tears burning her eyes and finally spilling over her cheeks. A large sob came before she bit the edge of the pillow. She lay for many hours, silently weeping, listening for Rhett to return. At dawn, exhausted and still alone, emotionally drained of all feelings, sleep finally overcame her.

 


	5. Love is a familiar. Love is a devil. There is no evil angel but Love.

****Chapter 5** **

****Love is a familiar. Love is a devil. There is no evil angel but Love. William Shakespeare** **

Rhett swept out of the hotel, not sure where he was going but somewhere far from that green-eyed witch. The streets were ghostly-looking with a heavy mist from the river obscuring the buildings. Rhett walked quickly, trying to relieve his frustration. He made his way to the river, hearing the soft sound of the mighty water lapping the shore, the groaning and creaking of the ships at anchor and the soft calls of the nightbirds. He then turned his back on the water and continued on to Jackson Square which was enveloped in the slowly swirling vapour.

The spire of St. Louis Cathedral rose high above the thick fog. For a long time, Rhett just stared up, not really seeing anything except Scarlett's face, her black brows that were shaped as bird wings, the perfect rosebud mouth that always seemed to invite a kiss, the slightly pointed chin that she would lift high when she was angry and those eyes. Her eyes that told all her inner secrets if one knew how to read them. Those eyes that were never far from his thoughts and fantasies.

His emotions were tense. His whole body was like that of a cobra, eyes slivered, muscles coiled, ready for any attack.

He suddenly barked a bitter laugh. "I called her a fool, yet truth be told, I am the fool. A conceited fool. I thought by buying her a few new dresses and some shiny baubles I would have her heart ." Rhett's thoughts were seething like the great ocean seas, rising and falling, swirling like a maelstrom.

" I thought that she was on the verge of loving me, seeing me as something other than a bank account. But even in our bed, the 'noble' Ashley Wilkes haunts us, the thought of him, the desire of him by her..."

Rhett started his rapid walking again. The coolness of the night air could not dispel the hot anger he felt at Scarlett, at Ashley and most of all, at himself. Every step seemed to pound fool, fool, fool.

After more than an hour of trying to walk away the pain he was feeling, Rhett made his way north to the Garden District. The scent of roses and lilies started to soothe him, his senses remembering a quieter time in his life, before he had ever been to Georgia. He opened a ornate wrought iron gate which had the number 55 written in finely scrolled brass and walked up the long brick path edged with carefully tended flowers to a large, stately home. An enormous man, black as the night, stood on the veranda, wearing white gloves and a heavy longcoat. His dark brown eyes lit up when he saw Rhett.

"Even' Capt' Butlah. Been long time since you paid us a visit." the man said, a grin spreading over his broad face.

"Good evening, Joe. How have you been keeping?"

"Fine suh. Sure is good to see you again." Joe said.

"Is Madame Giselle busy? I would like a word with her."

"I'll jus see suh. Please come in." Joe opened the door to reveal a graceful, arched hallway with thick persian rugs and large arrangements of flowers.

After giving his cape and hat to Joe, Rhett entered a perfectly proportioned room with a long mahogany bar. There were soft couches and small tables scattered about the room, tasteful paintings of beautiful women and pastural landscapes graced the pale pink silk lined walls. Four women, as beautiful as the ladies in the paintings, sat decoratively about the room. Joe followed Rhett in and made his way over to the bar where a tall thin man polished a lead crystal glass. "Sam" murmured Joe, "It's Cap'n Butlah come back for a visit... Get him a bottle of our best whiskey."

Rhett seated himself at a small table in the back corner of the room. He drank down two fast shots of the aged whiskey. He didn't really taste anything but felt the warm welcoming burn in his chest.

The young women cast their eyes over to him. They had all heard many tales of the great Captain Butler. How though he was a paying customer, and a well paying one at that, he seemed to enjoy not only the taking of pleasure but the giving of it too. A girl lucky enough to be chosen to partner the Captain would be left with dreamy smiles, large tips and maybe a few new ideas to add to their repertoires.

A tall octoroon of an indeterminate age, entered the room. She still had great beauty with the regal bone structure of the French blood in her veins. She carried herself with the grace of a queen, for she was a queen. Hers was the finest Gentleman's Club in a city filled with such clubs.

Madame Giselle Chaland had, many years before, been taken by her Mamma to the famous Octoroon Ball. Giselle had only been seventeen but her beauty was breathtaking. There at the Ball she had met her protector, Roberte Degan. He had been a kind gentleman whom had cared deeply for Giselle and who she had loved with all her heart. They had had a few brief years of happiness together before Roberte had to enter a marriage of a convenience. His pious wife gave him the choice, give up Giselle or he would never have an heir. Roberte had bought this fine house in the Garden District for Giselle and they never again would meet. He died the following year in a yellow fever outbreak without an heir. Giselle had mourned his death more than his wife.

The house and it's furnishing's were as fine as any in the District. It specialized in serving the comfort of gentleman but not any deviations, for that men could go to Storyville. The young ladies were treated with respect and never hurt. They were hired not only for their beauty but for their manners and intellect as well. Very rarely would Giselle entertain a gentleman herself for she still mourned her beloved Roberte more than thirty years later.

Only gentleman were permitted to be members, during the Northern invasion, no Yankees ever crossed the threshhold, it is doubtful they even knew of the club, for one had to be introduced to Madame Giselle by a member and New Orleanians could keep a secret amongst themselves. Number Fifty-Five was run as a true Gentleman's Club, in the sense that men paid their dues on time and in full, proper decorum was maintained otherwise one would be black balled from the establishment and soon a man would find his business contacts shunning him on the street and invitations for social events no longer issued. Possibly some of the gentlemen's wives knew of Number Fifty-Five, but wisely kept silent for if Madame Giselle's house was closed the men would only find another house possibly one that was not so palatable.

Madame Giselle said in her delightful light accent " Mon Cherie Rhett. How I have missed you. It has been much too long. It is wonderful to see you again!"

"Bon Soir Giselle. You are as looking as lovely as I remembered." Rhett had stood from his chair and bowed low over Giselle's outstretched hand.

"Are you interested in anything special tonight? I have many new filles since you last were here. Each more beautiful and artful than the last." Giselle purred.

"Giselle, though I am sure they are delightful, I am a married man now. I am on my honeymoon. "

"And so? We have many married men come to visit us here at Number Fifty-Five. They do not usually visit on their honeymoons but c'est la vie." Giselle lifted her shoulders in a delicate shrug.

Rhett smiled. "No, mon amie, what I want tonight is a quiet room and a full bottle of whiskey. Do you have one available?"

"But of course. You may make use of my salon, no one shall disturb you there. I believe you remember the way?" Giselle's eyes twinkled.

"Merci, Giselle." Rhett bowed once again over her hand and then made his way up the stairs.

Seated in a comfortable chair with the whiskey bottle and a humidor on the table beside him, Rhett drank and smoked. He wanted to get drunk and forget Scarlett. Neither thing seemed possible that long night.

Over and over he berated himself. After so many years of dreaming of her, loving her, hating her but still dangerously, sickenly drawn to her, he had thought she was starting to love him. During their lovemaking that night, he had come so close to confessing his love and desire for her. Holding her after, feeling her breathing steady and her pulse slow he thought she was happy. How wrong he was. Her sigh told him that 'The Esteemed Mr. Wilkes', that pitiful excuse for a gentleman, was still in her thoughts and in her heart.

"It's a pretty place you have gotten yourself, love sick like a boy, mooning over a woman who only cares for you as long as you sign the bills. It's not as if I didn't know what I was getting myself into, I will say that for her, she was honest when she accepted my proposal, she is fond of me and my money does help. Bah, there is no point going over it. The question is what do I do now? Kill Ashley, kill Scarlett, kill myself? All three of us or a combination? Killing myself is out of the question, I have never backed down from a battle and I won't take a cowards way out of this mess.

Murdering Ashley probably would do more harm than good. She would spend the rest of her life mourning him, making him even more sainted in her memory, and I would never be able to compete with that. Ashley would most likely thank me for putting him out his misery on this earth, so I would be doing a kindness in one sense but then I could never purposely hurt Miss Melly.

Throttling Scarlett may be gratifying if only because surely at that moment of her death, she would realize how much I love her." Rhett stopped for a minute, imagining fear filled emerald eyes slowly closing, never to open again.

"No! For all the pain she has given me, I truly cannot imagine a life without Scarlett O'Hara. God knows, I have tried to cure my sickness of those eyes, tried more times than I can count to forget her, leave her and never come back. But I always did come back to her. Even while she was married to dear old Frank, I couldn't stay away. She has poisoned me. I must succeed if I am ever to have any peace. This isn't how things work out in the fairy tales is it, or is it? Didn't Prince Charming always have to slay a dragon to win his lady love? And so must I slay the dragon."

An idea came to him. As the whiskey bottle emptied, Rhett slowly developed a plan. It wasn't going to be easy and there was some risk that she may end up hating him but, if successful, the pay off would be better than any poker hand he had ever won. To hear Scarlett say the words 'I love you Rhett'.

 


	6. “The Love That Lasts The Longest Is The Love That Is Never Returned”

****Chapter 6** **

**“ **The Love That Lasts The Longest Is The Love That Is Never Returned”****

****W. Somerset Maugham** **

For the first time since the start of her honeymoon, Scarlett woke by herself. There was no one there, no one to tickle her feet, no one to stroke her long hair or softly kiss her eyes awake. She slowly came to consciousness on her own. Her eyes were burning and her body felt sore as if she had climbed a mountain. She cautiously opened her eyes, blinking against the light, not sure where she was at first. Her mind swirled, trying to get her bearings. Then it all came back to her and she felt like she had been hit. Rhett had left her. He was gone. He had leapt away from her as if he hated her. Scarlett felt an ache in her chest. But why did he leave? Scarlett tried to remember. He had said she was a fool but what had she done that was so bad? Slowly the night's passion came back to her. Had she been too forward last night? She remembered how she had responded to his touch and found herself stroking his body, feeling his strong back and the firmness of his shoulders. She had pulled him towards her, wanting him. The shame overwhelmed her. "I really am not a lady after all. " Tears started to well up again in her tired eyes and her throat tightened painfully.

"Damn it, Scarlett O'Hara, that is enough! " She quickly brushed away the tears and took a deep breath. Throwing back the soft covers of the bed, Scarlett rose and walked over to the wash basin. She splashed the cool water on her face, thankful for the relief. Looking in the mirror above, she saw how pale she was and how red her eyes were. Scarlett straightened her spine and raised her chin. "Enough, Scarlett!" she said to herself again. She put on her robe, tying the sash tightly around her tiny waist. Squaring her shoulders she made her way to the door of the sitting room, thinking she may find him there. Pausing to take a breath she opened the door, ready for battle.

But Rhett wasn't there either. Her shoulders sloped down and she exhaled quickly. "Oh, what now?" she whispered. She made her way back into the bedroom, Rhett's clothes were still hanging in the wardrobe and folded neatly in the drawers, so he hadn't packed his bags in the middle of the night, but where was he and why did he leave?

Scarlett sat back down on the bed, trying to make sense of it all. But nothing made any sense. All she knew was Rhett was angry at something she had done or not done. Oh what was it? Why did he act this way?

For a long while Scarlett sat there, with thoughts and flashes of memories of her days and nights here in New Orleans whirling through her mind.

Suddenly she heard a key in the lock, she ran to the sitting room as the door opened. "Rhett where were..."

But it was not Rhett who came through the door.

"Scuze me ma'am, I'm here to make up the room." A young black girl dressed in a maids uniform curtsied to Scarlett.

"What... oh yes.. I see." Scarlett focused herself back to where she was. "What is your name?"

"Sookie, ma'am." the maid bobbed down again.

"Well, fine, Sookie, but first I want you to draw me a bath and get me a pot of coffee and some slices of cucumber. Can you do that?"

"Yes'm."

"And also," Scarlett hesitated, "Are there any messages for me?" She wasn't sure if she wanted to learn by a note where he was but it would be better to know and face it then sit for hours unsure of where Rhett had gone and if he was coming back or not.

"No ma'am, I don't think so but I can check for you when I's get your coffee."

"Yes, do that. Now draw my bath for me. "

After her bath Scarlett dressed herself in a plain muslin day dress and arranged her hair in a smooth chignon. The cucumber slices had soothed her eyes and the coffee has started to revive her spirit. Scarlett was now getting mad.

There had been no messages for her. She paced back and forth, going over to the window every few minutes to see if Rhett was coming down the street, then to the settee to try a read a Godey's ladies magazine before tossing it down to continue pacing.

How dare he leave her all alone. She couldn't go anywhere for she didn't know her way around the Quarter without Rhett leading the way and she couldn't go to the dining room without an escort though surprisingly she wasn't hungry anyway. Her stomach was too tied up in knots.

And so Scarlett continued to pace and with each hour that passed the angrier she got and the sharper green her eyes became.

"Oh, where is he? When is he coming back?" She stopped her pacing, " What happens if he doesn't come back? What will I do then?

That cad, that low down... " Well she couldn't say it, but she could think it. And Scarlett did think it.

Back she went to the window. There, walking with his characteristic grace, was Rhett. He stood out from all the others on the street. His height, his broad shoulders, his way of walking, as if the world belonged to him. Scarlett saw him tip his hat to a lady then he moved on towards the hotel. Quickly, Scarlett flew to the mirror, smoothing her hair and pinching her cheeks before settling herself down on the settee, taking up the magazine again.

Rhett came in the room, she sensed him more than heard him, for he could walk as stealthily as a cat. Looking up she said with all the injured tone which every wife throughout history has ever used, "So you decided to come home."

Rhett bowed low towards her with an arrogance all his own. He looked awful. He needed a shave and a bath. She could smell the stale whiskey on him and the faint scent of something else. Something like expensive French perfume. She didn't know why but that made her chest hurt again. She quickly looked back at the magazine, frightened of showing him the sudden pain that she felt. Knowing he would just laugh at her and her naivety.

"Good morning my pet, or should I say good afternoon. " Rhett's eyes were as cold and hard as Scarlett's. He was watching her, waiting for something.

"Humph" Scarlett sniffed, not bothering to even glance up at him but continued snapping the pages of the magazine. Her heart was pounding hard and her body was aching. She too was waiting for something.

"I am just here to get cleaned up. Please don't let me disturb your reading". Bowing low once again, Rhett went to his dressing room.

"So he thinks he can just waltz in here and act as though nothing has happened. He is not even going to acknowledge his ridiculous behaviour. Which of the "fair ladies" did he find companionship with last night?" Tears started to well in her eyes again. " Oh this is stupid. It's not as if I even care." Holding her chin up she continued with her inner monologue. "How dare he, how dare he storm out of here and go wherever he went. What was it that I did so wrong, nothing. And for him to leave me and go to someone else...It's too much to bear. Well, if he thinks I'm going to ask him what's wrong he has another thing coming."

Scarlett started her feverish pacing again. "He better start apologizing fast. He better come out here and go down on his knee and beg for my forgiveness. Then maybe I might think about talking to him " She would pretend to see right through him and act as if he wasn't even there. Men hated it when you ignore them, this was an old trick that Scarlett had used many times successfully in the past. And the men felt so bad for causing such hurt to a girl they always broke down. Sometimes, bestowing a small gift in apology.

"Oh yes. This will be fun and I know exactly what I want, those gorgeous gold and ruby drop earrings I noticed in the jewelry shop yesterday. Oh I will lead Rhett on a merry dance!" Scarlett started to smile in anticipation of the boot licking she would force Rhett to do.

Hearing the dressing room door start to open, she scurried back to the settee and snatched up the magazine. Scarlett had to bite her cheek to stop the smile on her lips.

"Scarlett" Rhett said but she didn't bother to look up instead she straightened her spine, sitting in a most lady like pose that Mammy would have beamed with pride to have seen.

"Scarlett, I'm sorry.."

"Yes, here it comes, so easy" Scarlett was squirming inside with anticipation.

"Scarlett, I am sorry to interrupt but you seem to be holding your magazine upside down. Is that a talent of yours which I never knew about, the ability to read upside down? You must teach me it some day."

Scarlett's mouth popped open and embarrassment flooded her face. Her angry eyes glared at Rhett.

Rhett's eyes danced and a slow grin moved across his mouth. He waited for the angry retort he was so sure was on Scarlett's lips but she stayed mute.

" Ah well. Then I wish you a good afternoon, Mrs. Butler. I am going out to do some business. I shall be back in time to escort you to dinner. Please continue with your magazine."

Closing the door behind him, Rhett let out a chuckle when he heard first the magazine being thrown at the door followed by something made of glass. Stopping at the front desk Rhett asked for a maid to be sent to his suite as sadly, something had been broken.

He excited the hotel and stopping to light a cheroot on the front stairs, his eyes became set and his face determined. Would this work, would he be able to sway her? It had to work otherwise...

With a firm step, Rhett set off to put his plan into action.

Scarlett spent a good part of the afternoon alternating between fuming over Rhett's behaviour and trying to decide what to wear for their last night in New Orleans. Her dressing room was awash in frothy evening gowns of all colours and designs. She had finally decided on beautiful black of silk. It was simple in adornment with small cap sleeves worn off her shoulders and tight across her abdomen. The bustle cascaded material down the back of the gown, which was cut quite low showing her straight spine and lovely neck. Her hair was parted in the middle and swept back off her face to fall in soft ringlets down her back. Scarlett debated for some time whether to wear her new combs that Rhett had given her, for they would have enhanced her hair, but then she decided against them and put them firmly away. She was not going to give Rhett any sign other than her extreme anger towards him. The only jewelry Scarlett wore was her wedding rings. She also decided to forgo her rouge as her paleness would be an unspoken rebuke to Rhett. Little did Scarlett realize but she never looked lovelier. The simplicity of her ensemble only accented her beauty.

If Scarlett had been looking up instead of fiddling with the long fringe on her shawl, she would have seen the admiration and desire that sparked in Rhett's eyes when she entered the sitting room.

"Ah, ready at last my pet? Shall we go?" Offering Scarlett his arm, the couple made their way out the door.

For their final dinner in New Orleans, Rhett had chosen Antoine's. The room was packed with people and the noise was lively, the orchestra playing a medley of Strauss waltzes. After being seated at their table, the waiter immediately opened a bottle of chilled champagne, pouring a small amount for Rhett's approval, after Rhett nodded his head, the waiter proceeded to fill Scarlett's glass and with a bow, departed to the kitchen.

"A toast to my beautiful wife, may her aim stay true." Rhett raised his glass to Scarlett.

"Humph" Scarlett answered. She drank her wine, not looking in Rhett's direction, but at the other diners, the large ornate gas lamps which hung down from the sculpted ceiling, the paintings on the wall, anywhere but at her husband.

The waiter returned with the first course which was a thick and creamy shrimp bisque. The soup was perfect but Scarlett was only able to take a few small sips, her stomach was too coiled up to allow her any enjoyment with the meal. On and on came new dishes, none of which held any flavour or pleasure for her. Rhett continued to make small talk, which she did not respond to. He seemed not to notice her silence but continued to speak of things such as the history of New Orleans, the talk of Queen Victoria, still deep in mourning for her beloved Albert, the latest inventions coming from the North. And the waiter continued to pour more wine and bring more dishes out.

At one point Scarlett peeked over at Rhett while he was busy with the waiter and noticed he was wearing the mother of pearl studs and links she had given him. This gave her a certain feeling of delight and then of sadness. Why couldn't this last night in New Orleans be as nice as the other evenings they had spent here? How she wished he would say something about what had happened last night, to explain and to apologize. To make everything better again.

When the very large crayfish was presented at the table, Scarlett was determined to enjoy it for it was her favourite dish. But even the delicate sweetness of the shellfish she could not savour, it might as well have been the awful hominy and dried peas she had survived on for so long. But she forced it down as if it was a medicine she had to take.

It was with a sense of relief that the dinner finally ended. Rhett gently placed the pale yellow Chinese embroidered shawl over her bare shoulders and holding her by the elbow, escorted her back to the hotel.

Upon reaching their room, Scarlett gave a large yawn that was somewhat theatrical.

"I am tired now. I think I will retire to bed. Good night"

"To all, to each, a fair good-night, And pleasing dreams and slumbers light." Rhett quoted, gazing at Scarlett, with a soft smile on his lips.

"Yes, I guess so or well good night" Scarlett stammered and she hurried to her dressing room.

As quickly as she could, Scarlett prepared herself for bed, barely brushing her hair nor washing her face. She donned one of her soft cotton night dresses with the pretty eyelet lace and slipped into the large bed. She was nervous that Rhett would come to her and if she was honest with herself, she was nervous that he wouldn't come to her. What was it she wanted. Oh why were things so confusing. Closing her eyes tightly, Scarlett curled herself into a small ball on the far side of the bed. Her heart was beating rapidly, and her ears were sharp for the sound of Rhett. But he didn't come and no sound could she hear from the sitting room.

After a long while, Scarlett's body slowly started to relax, her toes uncurled and her fingers let go of the death grip she had held on the linen sheets. Her mind started to release and she gave herself in to the exhaustion that she had felt upon waking that morning. Scarlett slept.

 


	7. “We cast away priceless time in dreams, born of imagination, fed upon illusion, and put to death by reality “

**Chapter 7**

**“We cast away priceless time in dreams, born of imagination, fed upon illusion, and put to death by reality** **“ Judy Garland**

The voices were the first to come;

... to feel that you are my own little girl again before you are gone from me.

Katie Scarlett is here, so you need not worry about anything

Weak like little kittens

Katie Scarlett, where is Mrs. O'Hara, I need to speak to her

Miss Scarlett, 'ness I gits mo' to eat, I kain nuss neither these chilluns

Wade doan like yams. Wade hungwy

I think you are hateful to talk to Baby and me like this

All alone, little lady?

You gotta go on being strong

The weary load the weary load

They came in and floated out. The voices wanted so much from her. She tried so hard. God give me strength. God help me. God forgive me.

The deafeningly loud roar of a gun's report. Then the blood, smeared and dripping.

The mist came now. A heavy mist, a fog. She couldn't see anything, not even her hand in front of her face. It swirled and changed shape. She had to run, she had to get there, get to...

but the mist was so thick. The ground was firm but then it started to fall away from her. She was stumbling, trying to stay upright, trying to run. Her skirts wrapped around her legs. Her lungs were bursting, but she had to reach it. "Wait for me, oh please wait for me" she called. "Stop, stop" She fell hard, but forced herself up to run again. But she was lost now, which way was it?

Warm arms wrapped around her and soft sounds were murmured in her ear. "Hush, hush. It's alright. You are safe. I am here. Sshh. There, there my love. Sshh."

Scarlett woke in Rhett's strong arms. His lips were whispering soft comfort in her ear. She clung tightly to him.

"Oh Rhett. It was awful!" She was trembling all over.

"You are here, Scarlett. You are safe."

"I tried so hard but I couldn't get to it.."

"Get to what, honey?"

"I don't know but I have to get to it or something bad will happen."

"Is this your nightmare?"

Scarlett nodded, burying her face into his neck. Her voice was strained, still filled with the fear from the dream.

"I am running and running and I am so scared but I have to get to it." Rhett slowly, gently stroked her hair.

"Is it someone or something?"

"I don't know. I just know if I don't get to it, I will never be happy again."

"You will be happy, Scarlett. I will make sure of that."

Scarlett looked up at him. Trying to find the truth in his words.

Rhett softly brushed away the tears on her face and kissed her on her cheek.

"Do you promise, Rhett?"

Rhett gathered her body in his arms and carried her over to the armchair by the window. He held her tightly, stroking away her fears.

"Do you think I will ever find what I am running towards?"

"Dreams don't usually work that way, honey. But when you get used to being well fed and not having to worry about so many things, the dream will stop coming. I'm sure."

"And if it doesn't? If it keeps coming back, what then?"

"I am here for you Scarlett. I will always be here."

Scarlett looked at his chest, his white shirt open showing the muscles playing over his body. Her fingers graced over them.

"You weren't here for me last night." Scarlett quietly said, not wanting to upset the closeness they were enjoying. She felt his body tense.

"Where did you go?"

Rhett paused and seemed to stop breathing.

"Why Scarlett, were you worried about me?" He said lightly.

"Yes, I mean, I, I, worried about you like anyone that I cared about. Like any...friend." Scarlett kept her eyes on Rhett's chest, too embarrassed to meet his mocking eyes.

His eyes were not mocking her though. They showed a sadness and a yearning. "How kind of you, my friend." Rhett breathed in deeply. "I think you have had enough for one night. You best get back to bed."

"Fine," Scarlett sighed. She climbed off his lap and crawled back into the large bed. "But Rhett, will you.." Now it was Scarlett's turn to pause and take a deep breath. "Will you hold me?"

"Darling" His arms craved to hold her.

"Just hold me Rhett. Keep the nightmare away for one night."

Rhett lay on the bed and held out his arms for Scarlett. She snuggled into his strong, unyielding chest. Feeling his warmth, his heart's steady beat. So many thoughts, so many emotions spinned around Scarlett's mind but gradually she was able to steady herself. Holding on to Rhett gave her a feeling of safety that she hadn't known for a very long time.

Rhett held Scarlett tightly, cocooning her in his embrace. He began to reflect on his Scarlett. When he had first danced with her at the bazaar, all he wanted was to bed her. She meant nothing more to him than a pair of mesmerizing green eyes and a tantalizing body. But over the years he found how much more she was than a beautiful body and a pretty face. She was a woman of strength and nerve. He wanted much more from her now. And he wanted to give so much more in return. In some ways she was like a little girl. He wanted to protect her, to fight her battles for her, to pet and to pamper her, to give her back some of the way of life before the War. He had always admired her incredible courage but knew also of her vulnerability. She was not the cold, calculating shrew that the world saw her to be. He knew how hard she had had to fight and how many people were dependent on her. Though she never complained of the burdens she was under but would square her shoulders and find a way to keep going. By selling herself in marriage to an old man or sharp dealings in her business. He wanted to take those burdens from her. He wanted her to not think of life as a constant battle but something to enjoy. He wanted her to laugh again. But most of all he wanted to love her and for her to love him. He had waited for so long.

Scarlett awoke, refreshed and happy. She stretched her arms over her head and snuggled back into the soft down pillow. The sheer curtains waved in the breeze through the tall windows. She began to hum a tune Rhett and she had danced to their first night in New Orleans. Two weeks had gone by so quickly. They were to board the train to Atlanta at 11:30 this morning.

There was a soft tap at the bedroom door and Rhett came in holding a silver tray with a large coffee pot, cream jug, sugar bowl and a cloth covered plate.

"Top of the morning to you, Scarlett" Rhett said in an atrocious Irish accent.

"And to you, Rhett." Scarlett smiled, showing her pretty dimples.

"Did you sleep well, I mean after the nightmare?"

"Yes, I did. I had no more dreams. Rhett, thank you."

"For what?"

"For being there for me, for being so kind when I was acting like such a baby."

"No need to thank me. I believe it was one of the vows I made when we married, to comfort."

"Doesn't it also say to love and to obey?'

"Does it, I must have missed those two. I bow to your superior knowledge of these matters." Rhett grinned and his eyes twinkled.

"Coffee?"

"Yes please."

Rhett, then with a flourish as fine as any french waiter, removed the cloth from the plate. "Beignet?"

"Yum, yes. I don't know which I'll miss more, the coffee or the beignets." She bit into the soft, sweet dough coating her lips with the powdered sugar.

Rhett bent down and slowly, sensuously kissed it all away. "Hmm, kisses as sweet as sugar." he crooned.

A soft sigh escaped from Scarlett. This is how she liked Rhett, when he was kind and loving and he could be so nice but then as quick as lightening he would be cutting or hurtful. She had decided she didn't really want to know where he had slept the other night. Sometimes it was easiest to put things out of mind. And she had given up trying to understand why he had left. It was the way he was, a mystery.

Though in little ways Scarlett knew Rhett better since they had married. She knew he liked his coffee black and his cigars Cuban. He was very particular about his clothes and his grooming but could dress in less than a quarter of the time it took Scarlett. She knew of his quick wit and the enjoyment he got by taking the mickey out of any pompous or stupid person and how kind he could be to someone less fortunate. She knew his grace on the dance floor and his exacting eye when it came to ladies fripperies. She knew how his kisses felt and how much he enjoyed undressing her. She knew these things but if she was honest, she knew Rhett no better than that afternoon at Twelve Oaks. So many times she had caught him looking at her in such a way that made her feel odd. It was like he was waiting for something. He was like a cat watching a bird flit about, waiting for it to settle so he could pounce.

"What time is it, Rhett?'

Rhett gazed in to Scarlett's beautiful, upturned eyes for a long moment.

"Rhett, what time is it?" Scarlett repeated, her smile growing larger, enjoying his look of fondness at her.

He moved back from Scarlett, his heart beginning to pound hard, and slowly pulled his pocket watch from his embroidered vest. He opened the watch and with a quick glance said "It's eleven ten."

"What, what time is it? Are you sure?" Scarlett squirmed out from the weight of Rhett and leapt out of the bed. "Oh, Rhett! Why didn't you wake me earlier? We'll never make the train! Are the bags all packed, are they at the station? Oh, don't just sit there grinning, help me get dressed!"

But Rhett made no move to help. He stayed seated on the edge of the disheveled bed and smiled at Scarlett's panic.

"Calm down Scarlett. Relax."

"What do you mean, relax? Oh where did my hairbrush go, is it packed already?" Scarlett scurried about the room, trying to prepare herself.

"Scarlett, stop!" Rhett voice had such a firm authority that Scarlett did stop and she stared at him.

Rhett's face became blank, his poker face, and his eyes were untelling of the tension that held him.

"I have a surprise for you, my pet. One that I hope you will like." Rhett spoke quietly with a certain apprehension.

"A surprise?" Scarlett wasn't sure if she wanted a surprise right now.

Rhett was watching Scarlett standing by the vanity in her diaphanous white nightdress. His eyes did not leave her face, more interested in her coming reaction than her alluring body.

"Yes, my dear." He paused for a heartbeat. "Our honeymoon is not over yet. I have decided we shall extend it a while longer." Rhett held his breath. "Surprise." he drawled softly.

Scarlett faltered, not sure if this was another one of Rhett's jokes.

"Oh, you are teasing me. Stop being so silly Rhett and help me get dressed!"

"No, I am not teasing you, my sweet, we are continuing our honeymoon. Tonight we are boarding a ship and we are making our way to San Francisco." His eyes held hers and she felt as though she was being hypnotized.

"Where did you get such a crazy idea, Rhett?"

'Why from you, Mrs. Butler. Don't you remember, the other day you said you wished the honeymoon would never end."

"We can't go to San Francisco. It will take weeks!" Scarlett gasped.

"I was thinking maybe two or three months. It all depends." Rhett's eyes sharpened.

"Two or three months! But what about the store, the mills?" Scarlett mind flashed to the thought of Ashley left in charge and how he would destroy everything she had built up.. All her hard work, all her scheming and planning would be ruined in three months without her there. Ashley would probably give the workers holidays and start taking IOU's for all her best lumber.

Rhett was watching her closely, his eyes alert seeing her mind working, her thoughts playing across her face.

"A penny for your thoughts, my dear."

"Oh, Rhett..."

"Honestly, if that is possible. What were you just thinking? Was it the Honourable Ashley Wilkes?"

"Yes, but Rhett..."

Rhett turned his back, wanting to hide from Scarlett the pain he felt.

Looking out the window he whispered to himself, "Why does that not surprise me."

"Rhett, we can't go for that long, what of the children?"

Turning back to Scarlett, Rhett said, "We can Scarlett and we will. I have sent telegrams to Miss Melly asking her to mind Wade and Ella and I have arranged for Mammy to help."

"I won't go!" Scarlett said, her voice rising.

"Yes, you will!" Rhett said with such ice in his voice it was if the words would crack.

He roughly pulled Scarlett into his arms, bending her back, overpowering her with his strength and his size.

"I am your husband" His eyes were blazing into hers, like a wild animal. His voice low and vicious. "I am not your Charles or your Frank or your precious Ashley. I am the man in this marriage and you will do as I say. I am not going to be bullied by you or any woman. In the eyes of the law your property is mine now and I will be the one to make the decisions."

He abruptly released Scarlett and walked back to the window, breathing deeply, trying to master his emotion. This wasn't going well. Why did he even suppose Scarlett would have been excited or happy to continue the honeymoon, to be away from the true love of her life even longer?

Scarlett felt weak. No man had ever spoken to her this way, treated her like this, but she wasn't going to go down without a fight.

"I never took you for one of those men that doesn't want his wife to own her own property, to have a brain and to use it on something other than the household accounts!"

"I'm not, my pet." Rhett drawled, "In fact I am very proud to have a intelligent wife with a good head for business. And when we return to Atlanta, I fully expect you to go back to running the mills and the store. They are Wade's and Ella's inheritance after all. But for the time being we are not returning to Atlanta. We are extending our honeymoon so you best accept the fact and make the best of it."

"Oh I accept the fact that you are a bully and I hate you and I will never forgive you Rhett Butler!"

"Really, my dear? Never is a long time." Rhett collected up his hat and gloves. "I am going to see to a few final arrangements. Can I get you anything? No? So be it. I shall be back soon." And Rhett quietly made his way out the door.

 

 


	8. “Speak Low, if you speak Love”

**Chapter 8**

**“Speak Low, if you speak Love” William Shakespeare**

Scarlett and Rhett boarded the Saragossa as the ship was preparing to cast off. The stevedores had just finished loading on supplies and cargo. The noise and excitement was high on the ship, with men running about, making sure everything was at the ready for departing from New Orleans. Captain Perry was there to welcome them on board his sleek clipper. He was a tall, thin man with a craggy face and deep blue eyes and he held himself upright with a strong sense of honour.

He bowed to Scarlett and shook Rhett's hand warmly. "Captain Butler, Mrs. Butler, it is a honour to have you on board."

"Thank you, John. She's a beauty, your ship" Rhett said.

"That she is, Rhett. She is one of the fastest there is for the Panama run. Would you be interested in helping me see her out the harbour? I believe there is no better pilot in the South than yourself, sir."

"It would be my utmost pleasure." Rhett bowed to the Captain.

Turning to Scarlett, Captain Perry said, "James, my First Mate, could see you to your cabin, Mrs. Butler, if that would be agreeable to you?"

The young James stepped forward and bowed to Scarlett. He had the look of Scarlett's first husband, a shyness and a softness of spirit. His soft brown eyes shyly gazed at her She was the loveliest woman he had ever seen and his heart thumped at her beauty.

"Fine." Scarlett said shortly, not even bothering to look at her escort. Her temper was still high. She felt like she was being shanghaied onto this boat and her mind was dwelling on the destruction of her mills. " Oh why did he have to insist on going to San Francisco? " she thought.

"This way, Mrs. Butler. Please watch your step through the doorway here." James said politely to Scarlett. He led her to the passageway. Hoping she would trip so that he might grasp her hand and help her over the sill, James glimpsed her fine ankle as she lifted her skirt to clear the sill. He would think of that shapely ankle for a long time to come.

Captain Perry and Rhett watched Scarlett and James go inside.

"And she's a beauty, your wife, Rhett. Funny, I never imagined you being the marrying kind. I guess there is much more to her than just her looks to have captured you," the Captain said with a grin.

Rhett just smiled in return. "Shall we cast off now Captain?" he said enigmatically.

Scarlett slammed the door after James left. She barely gave a glance at the luxuriousness of the cabin. The room was dark with fine woods and heavy with rich, red velvets. The rug was such thick pile, her shoes dipped in the wool.

She was furious and she was scared. Rhett, as a man, did have the right to take over her property. In the eyes of the law, everything she had belonged to him now. And the law made her his property now too and nothing could change that fact.

"Oh, to have been born a man…" Scarlett fumed, not for the first time in her life. She pulled the long hat pin which secured her deep red bonnet and tossed the hat on the bed.

Rhett could take everything from her, gamble it away, drink it away or spend it on those low kinds of women and she would be allowed no say on the matter.

Her practical mind knew that Rhett was a good business man. She knew he had made a fortune during the War and not only kept it, but built upon it. He wasn't likely to send the mills into bankruptcy.

But Ashley would. He had no head for business. Anyone with a hard luck story would get free credit of her finest lumber. If Beau had a sniffle, Ashley would stay home. That Johnny Gallagher would rob her blind, given half a chance. The other mill owners would soon realize she wasn't there and no doubt would snatch away her clients and Ashley would be too much the gentleman to fight them off. Why had she left him in charge when she knew what he was like, why did she have him working for her at all?

Well, she did know the answer to that, it was because she loved him. Scarlett tried to think back to that long ago day at Tara when he rode up on his horse after his return from Europe. But the memory was fading now. It wasn't as bright as it once was, it didn't move her as it used to do. Instead of the handsome young man with shining blonde hair and sleepy gray eyes, dressed in fine broadcloth and polished boots, she couldn't help but seeing the man he was now. His hair graying, his shoulders permanently slumped with dejection. His slow smile seldom seen now and his eyes showing a man in pain. He was no longer that fine young god that she had been enchanted with, he was a shadow.

In the background of her thoughts, Scarlett heard the muffled calls of the sailors on deck and the creaking of the ship. Her head began to ache and her stomach flipped about. She didn't feel well. She tried to stand but the floor beneath her moved and she fell back into the small silk covered slipper chair.

"Ohh" . A groan escaped from her. A bad taste rose up her throat to her mouth. She started to feel hot but shivery at the same time.

A light tap at the door and Rhett entered, his eyes alight and the smell of the sea cloaked him.

"Scarlett..."

Scarlett tried to keep her anger burning but she felt so awful.

Rhett immediately noticed her paleness and observed the droop in her posture.

"Are you all right my dear?"

"Of course I am!" Scarlett tried to snap but her stomach gave another heave and it only came out as a hoarse whisper.

"My Scarlett." Rhett's face softened. Realizing the trouble, he strode over to her and with one quick motion, swept her up into his arms and carried her out of the cabin.

"Stop Rhett, put me down." Scarlett weakly protested.

"No, I will not. You need air and I am taking you on deck." Rhett firmly said.

He effortlessly carried Scarlett outside. A half moon glowed a pale yellow in the blue black sky and the stars twinkled brightly. A cool breeze waved over Scarlett's face.

"Breathe deeply" Rhett ordered, lowering her feet down but still holding her tightly in his arms.

Scarlett held on to the smoothness of the ship's railing and felt the clean air fill her lungs. She could taste the salt of the ocean.

Her head stopped it's aching and her stomach settled but still she held on to the rail.

For a long while they stood still, feeling the air soothe them both. Scarlett's previous temper calmed in Rhett's embrace.

"Do you feel better now?" Rhett cautiously said.

Scarlett nodded her head slightly. Not quite ready to let go of her anger but thankful for Rhett's help, she wondered how he always knew what she needed.

Scarlett took a deep breath. "I imagine you like being at sea."

"I do, very much. I never feel more alive than steering a ship through rocky waters." Rhett softly spoke as though to someone else.

" 'Set any man walking and his feet will carry him to water'" Rhett quoted. "I can never imagine being too long away from the sea. She is my Tara. I get my strength from her."

"And yet you would stay away so long from your strength when you were in Atlanta?" Scarlett turned her head up to him.

"As did you, my pet."

They were silent for a time. Scarlett tried to think of something to say.

"What were the names of your ships during the war? You had four, didn't you?"

"The Enchantress, The Coquette, The Atlanta and The Green-Eyed Siren." Rhett kept his gaze out to the water.

"What is a siren?" Scarlett asked.

"She is a mythical creature. A woman who sings a hauntingly beautiful song luring the sailor towards her, causing him to smash his ship upon the treacherous rocks and drown. And even though the sailor knows he will die, he cannot stay away from her song which promises all the wonders of life and love."

Scarlett puzzled over this. "Are they always green-eyed?"

"No, not usually." Rhett looked down at Scarlett and he breathed in deeply.

"And so my dear, are you feeling better? Maybe it is time for you to retire."

Scarlett stifled a yawn. "I suppose."

"Let me escort you to our cabin then." Holding Scarlett impersonally by the arm, Rhett guided her to the cabin.

At the doorway, he paused.

"Do you need any assistance to prepare for bed?"

Scarlett shook her head.

"Well, goodnight then. I am going to take a stroll on deck." Rhett bowed to her and quietly closed the cabin door.

Scarlett sighed. She started her nightly routine. She changed out of her deep red travel gown and removed her corset. Always the best part of her day, when she could feel her lungs fill and her body was once again unconstricted. The feeling of the soft nightgown enveloped her. Hmm, she breathed. It was so hard to stay mad at Rhett when he was being kind to her. She wouldn't describe her married life with him as fun but it was not boring. It was not quite what she had expected but then she hadn't really thought what life with him would be like. Not really, she only imagined not ever having to worry about money again. This made her stop and actually think about her future life with Rhett. What would it be like?

"Oh I am too tired to think about this right now. When I feel more awake I'll think about it. Maybe tomorrow." Scarlett undid her hair and brushed it the hundred strokes that Mammy had always insisted upon. The ritual gave her a sense of peace. She briefly wondered if Rhett would expect anything of her tonight. Part of her hoped not but then another part of her hoped he would, and then she thought maybe it would serve him right to be rebuffed. But would he accept a rebuff, would he force himself on her? No, not Rhett. For all he insisted he was not a gentleman, Scarlett could never imagine he would ever be that low.

She crawled into the artfully carved bed. It was at that point she smelt the sweet orange blossom in the vase on her bedside table. Her favourite flower! And beside the vase was a bottle of the water she preferred and a dish of the bon bons Rhett had always brought to her during the War years.

Scarlett smiled. He must care for her a little bit. Otherwise, why would he bother to arrange for her favourite things? This gave her a feeling of power and an odd rush of happiness. Snuggling into the sheets, Scarlett let go of the anger she had felt earlier and drifted off into a sleep of pleasure and anticipation.

Rhett made his way up on deck. He took out his cigar case and pulled out a fine Cuban cigar he had bought that day. He licked his tongue over the tobacco and then lit it, drawing on it expertly. Between the scent of the tobacco and the scent of the sea, Rhett felt at home. He gazed up at the moon and breathed a sigh of relief. Things had gone better than he had expected. Yes, Scarlett was angry but no worse than he had anticipated. He had given away some of his inner feelings with the talk of the names of his ships, but Scarlett being Scarlett, did not grasp it. Rhett grinned. The only way Scarlett would ever understand things was when they were said in plain language. This had always been his way. To give her the truth but in such a way that she would not realize how deep his feelings were for her.

Rhett felt the ship following the waves of the sea. His legs naturally adjusting to the movement of the ocean. He was at home again. He grinned at the moon. Rhett's mind started to wander, short glimpses of memories flitted in and out, before it settled on one from a long time ago.

He was thirteen and his life had been fairly standard for a son of a prominent man in Charleston. He went to school and learned the classics and mathematics. He was tutored in fencing, horsemanship and dancing. He had friends but kept himself apart from them. Not because he was a snob but simply because he was comfortable on his own and never needed constant companionship.

His mother was having an afternoon tea to which he was expected to attend. It was there that he met and immediately fell in love with Elizabeth Barnes. She was a beautiful dainty with chestnut hair and eyes as blue as the summer sky. Her manners were perfect, a proper little lady with all the social graces. Her tiny feet peeped out from her short skirts, her small hands gracefully folded in her lap. They were introduced by Rhett's mother and Rhett became shy and tongue tied. He somehow stammered out a polite greeting as he shook Elizabeth's soft dimpled hand and she smiled up at him. After the party, Rhett could think of nothing else but her. He was love sick. He wrote poetry for her, imagining how he would read it to her. He practiced conversations he would have with her, picturing her blue eyes gazing at him in adoration. She haunted his daytime thoughts and his nightly dreams. He was feeling things in his mind and his body that he had never felt before.

Determined to have her notice him, Rhett collected his pocket money and scoured the markets and the shops to find the perfect token of love to give her. After many hours of searching he at last found it. A small, golden locket in the shape of a heart. He knew the edict, only candy and flowers were permissible gifts from a young gentleman, but surely it was different for your true love.

Eventually the opportunity came for Rhett to persuade Elizabeth to take a walk in the garden away from her mother and her girl friends. Rhett had never felt like more of a man than the moment he slipped Elizabeth's arm through his as they strolled through the flower beds. Seating Elizabeth on a small stone bench, Rhett pulled out the tissue wrapped locket. The paper was not as crisp as it once had been due to constant opening and rewrapping of the token by Rhett. Elizabeth acted surprised and then opened her present. She just stared at it.

"Miss Barnes, Elizabeth… I love you!" but it was at that moment, that second that Rhett's voice cracked. It shot up and down two octaves. Elizabeth started to smile, then to giggle then to out right laugh before jumping up from the bench and running to her group of friends. Their laughter joined with hers and Rhett wanted the earth to open and swallow him whole. He felt like a stupid oaf. He ran past the giggling girls, his face burning with embarrassment, out of the house he ran, trying get the sound of the laughter out of his mind.

He didn't return back to his home until dinner. His mother looked at him with soft pity in her eyes and his father thought it a grand joke to constantly crack his own voice, while doing his nightly pontificating. Ross guffawed loudly, reveling in his older brother's discomfort.

Finally, no longer able to hold his temper or disguise the burning hatred he felt for his father, Rhett rose from the table and bowing politely to his mother, he walked out of the dining room.

His father whipped him that night for his rudeness and disrespect. Later on lying on his in bed, feeling the sharp sting of the welts on his back from the horses crop his father had used, Rhett swore that never again would he say the words 'I love you' to any woman. Never again would he expose himself to such humiliation or such pain.

Rhett sneered at the memory and at himself, for he still felt the squirm of embarrassment so many years later.

Taking a final deep puff, he tossed his cigar into the sea and went back inside the ship to the cabin.

 


	9. Love, unrequited, robs me of my rest: Love, hopeless love, my ardent soul encumbers: Love, nightmare-like, lies heavy on my chest, And weaves itself into my midnight slumbers!

**Chapter 9**

**Love, unrequited, robs me of my rest: Love, hopeless love, my ardent soul encumbers: Love, nightmare-like, lies heavy on my chest, And weaves itself into my midnight slumbers! ~**

**William S. Gilbert**

And so the days and the nights of the voyage passed. To all outward appearances, they seemed like a typical honeymoon couple. They would promenade around the deck of the ship, Scarlett's arm linked with Rhett's, Rhett would tell Scarlett outlandish stories of his pirate grandfather and tales of his own blockading days and make her laugh or wonder at the truth of his stories. Rhett was always attentive to Scarlett's needs, making sure she had every comfort available. She, in kind, would tease him and banter with him as if she was a young belle again, enjoying the freedom from the cares that had worn her down for so long.

But for one with a sharper eye and a clearer understanding of human nature, it was obvious that all was not as it seemed to be. Captain Perry was such a man. He had known Rhett for many a year, as much as anyone could know him, for Rhett kept his secrets close. He was not a man to wear his heart on his sleeve nor was he a man that felt the need to share his sorrows or his thoughts with others. When Captain Perry had heard that Rhett was married, he wondered what special trait did his wife have to catch such a man. Upon meeting Scarlett, he of course acknowledged her fine looks, but there were many women in the world with more beauty than her, some of whom had been coupled with Rhett in the past. He quickly realized it wasn't for her looks that Rhett had married this widow from Georgia, he could see that Scarlett was no shrinking violet ,for all her coquettish ways, she was a woman of intelligence and she had steel in her spine. But he also saw that something was not quite right between the couple. Rhett had a sense of yearning for something from his bride, and she seemed to be shy and confused by her bridegroom. It was an interesting spectacle to observe and one that he hoped would have a happy ending.

For both the honeymoon couple, the voyage was as if two strangers had just been introduced. Each were on their best behaviour and trying to flatter the other, trying to show themselves in their best light.

Rhett always had a compliment for Scarlett on her gowns and her hair designs. But many times she would question whether she had seen any spark of admiration in his eye before Rhett's face became a blank canvas which revealed nothing to her.

Each night Rhett would escort her to their cabin and ask if she needed any assistance in preparing for bed and when the offer was refused he would wish her pleasant dreams and make his way to the deck, to smoke a cigar and to think. He didn't touch Scarlett except to escort her by the arm. He no longer kissed her or patted her. If, in the night Scarlett's head rested upon his chest, he would not move away but he did not stroke her hair or kiss her face, even when she slept. When her dreams turned back to the nightmare, he would only croon softly to her, letting her know that someone was near, that the dream was not real and that she was safe. He kept a firm control over his body and his feelings for his beautiful wife.

His thoughts during his nightly walks on deck were not under such control. It was then that he felt the most turmoil. He knew that a life with Scarlett would never be peaceful but then if he had wanted peace in his life he would have married that girl back in Charleston and followed in his father's past footsteps as his younger brother had done.

But Rhett loved adventure and danger. He fed on the feelings of excitement, when his heart was beating and his nerves alight, he felt most alive. That is why he enjoyed tweaking Scarlett. When she was angry, she was most like the woman that would be his equal. Her eyes would spark and her bosom would heave. She was like an animal not long from the wild and he found her so desirable at those times. For this he had wanted her, this is what had attracted him to her, more than her pretty face and alluring figure. Never did he want to break her spirit but he wanted to fight life's battles beside her and with her. He wanted her passion not only in his bed but in all his life.

That was not to say he had not spent many nights dreaming of what her spirit and her fire would bring to his bed. Rhett gave a silent groan. He had had a taste of her passion since they had married. He was sure he had enjoyed more of Scarlett's true nature than the boy, Charles, and that old woman in britches, Frank Kennedy. The thought of his Scarlett forced by matrimony to give her body to such men sickened Rhett. One, a fumbling young fool who no doubt had hurt her and the other, old and priggish. Rhett had drunk a lot of whiskey during Scarlett's time as Mrs. Kennedy, trying to block the vision of her soft white skin being mauled by the yellowed hands of her husband. It came almost as a relief to him when she was pregnant with Ella, as he knew Frank would stop using her body for his pleasure during this time.

But it was the thought of Ashley that caused him the most disquiet. Had he ever known the feeling of Scarlett pressing her body against his, felt her sweet tasting tongue doing sword play with his, felt her soft, warm breath against his ear?

Rhett knew that they had kissed at least once before, Scarlett had admitted as much to him, but what had it meant for her? What feelings had been invoked from that kiss, what hunger, what want?

"Damn her. She must see that I am the man that was destined for her. Ashley will never be able to give her the real love that she deserves and truly desires." Rhett wanted all of her and for her to want him, in all ways.

The joining of his body with hers had been something he had dreamt of for so many years, but when the time had come that finally he was able to touch her as a husband he had held himself under a tight rein. He had been with so many women, ladies, whores, young, old but never had he made love with a woman. The great poets of the world and history described the feelings but never had he enjoyed the ideal of making love. Of course he knew all the arts of love, he had been well taught , for each of his bed mates had brought a new piece of knowledge to him. A touch here may make one sigh but another squirm, a kiss on one's breast may invite him to her nipple yet for another woman she would want a gentle touch to her neck or a stroke on her rounded belly. Many of the women he had bedded had said they loved him and some of them may have even been telling the truth but never had he known the true union of a man and a woman, exchanging and accepting the ecstasy of love. He had known somehow that though Scarlett had been married twice before, she was as innocent as a virgin. He wanted for her to taste the delights of intimacy and not think of the marital bed as a chore or a man's foolishness. He hoped that some day she would delight in and not be disgusted by intimacy but he had many years of her mother's and Mammy's teaching to break down and the two marriages before had probably not helped much either. He knew if he was to truly make love to her now she would be frightened by his ardor and to be honest with himself he was frightened of it himself. Time and patience was how things must progress. He had shown Scarlett what the union between man and woman could be like, the sensuousness of a touch on her inner thigh, a dart of a tongue on her belly button, the firm hand on her lower back. But he gave to her with no want of her giving to him, knowing that would be asking too much of her. He hoped that at some point she would reciprocate, touch for touch, kiss for kiss but he sensed that these things would take time. In some ways bedding Scarlett was even more frustrating to him than never having her, yet he still yearned for that day that she made love to him and he to her, with no thoughts of anything but each other's pleasure. The night in New Orleans had given him such hope for what would possibly come but then he heard that sigh from her, the sigh for Ashley.

As for Scarlett, to begin with she was somewhat content with the situation, believing that Rhett must care for her and want her, otherwise why did he marry her? She was still disconcerted over her previous reactions to Rhett's touch and that is why every night she shied off having him help her undress. The never before felt desires he had awakened in her made her feel timid and she knew that she would have a hard time rebuffing any advances made by him. For as much as she was ashamed, she still dreamt of his hands smoothly touching those forbidden places and the craving that was awakened in her by him. She kept trying to put those thoughts out of her mind, but just the touch of his hand on her elbow made her shiver and cause her to return in her memory to the linen sheets and soft beds of their honeymoon.

But Rhett never seemed to want her in that way now.

He was polite and courteous to her always but no more than as an acquaintance, he did not speak of love to her or try to touch her or kiss her.

This piqued Scarlett's vanity. It was not the way her husbands or any of her beaus had ever responded to her. They had always wanted her kisses, begged for them, and if she thought it would be advantageous to her, she would permit them. But Rhett was treating her like someone's maiden aunt. It rankled her because she couldn't understand what Rhett expected from her or what he wanted from her.

On the fourth day of the voyage, Scarlett came up with a little plan.

"Rhett, can you help me, I think I have something in my eye."

Rhett rose from the small leather armchair and went to her, sitting by the rosewood vanity. He took her hands and drew her closer to the light from the window. Taking her lovely face in his hands, he tilted her head upwards. He was once again amazed at how green her eyes were, how soft the skin of her cheeks, how sensuous her lips .

Scarlett's heart was beating rapidly. Rhett hadn't been so close to her since they had left New Orleans. She so wanted to feel his lips overpowering her mouth. She wanted those feelings of spinning out of control, her body tingling, her nerves on fire.

Rhett looked deeply into her eyes, his own eyes started to burn with desire for her. He searched for what he wanted most, but it was not there.

Scarlett parted her lips, sure that at any moment he would kiss her.

Rhett smiled. Moving his gaze to her plump red lips that were trembling for his, he took a deep breath. Then he spoke lowly, "I don't see anything. Maybe you should try bathing your eyes with some water."

He moved away from Scarlett, gathering his control again. His arms aching for her but his will overpowering his want.

"Have you ever questioned what you wanted from your life, Scarlett?" Rhett sat in the soft armchair, pulling out a cheroot.

"Why, to be rich of course. And to be a great lady." Scarlett replied, without a moments hesitation, confused as to why he was asking such fool questions when she just wanted to be kissed. What was wrong with him, what was wrong with her that he didn't want her?

" In my experience, not all great ladies are rich. I think great ladies are born not made. But as I once told you, ladies have never held much charm for me."

"Are you saying that I can't ever be a great lady?" Scarlett was confused by this conversation and was getting angry as she always did when she did not understand things.

"I think you should be true to yourself. That is the only way to find happiness." Rhett paused, trying to form his words so that he might explain things clearly to Scarlett.

"You know, after I was thrown out of my father's home, my one aim in life was to be rich. To be richer than him so that I could show him that I could not only survive without him, but prosper."

"But you are rich and look at you now."

"Yes, my dear, I am rich. But for all my wealth there is much I can't buy." Rhett's eyes took on a distant look for a moment. Then with a slight grin on his lips, Rhett said," Tell me Scarlett, how do you define "a great lady"?

"Well, someone like my mother." Scarlett quickly answered.

"But aside from the fact she was your mother, what made her a great lady?"

Scarlett softly said, as though she was speaking of the Madonna, "Mother was always kind and she never got angry and she was always thinking of others."

"So if your definition of a 'Great Lady' is one who is nice, never shows her true feelings and is helpful to the less fortunate, how would you change to become one?"

"I guess, I..." Scarlett faltered, never having really thought the whole plan through. She had just expected that once she had money and time that of course she could return back to Mammy's teachings and so it would follow, she would be a lady. Wasn't that how she had been raised, to be a Great Lady?

"Truthfully Scarlett, have you ever been remotely close to your definition of a great lady? And just because you are rich now that you are my wife, how will you be different? Will you start delivering hot soup to the poor and washing their feet? Will you spend your days working along side Mrs. Merriweather and Mrs. Meade doing good works? Will you smile sweetly and accept it when someone underbids you for lumber? Will you still run your mills and your store? And what of the saloon? Will you sit quietly with the other married ladies discussing childbirth and little Johnny's new tooth whilst the band plays your favourite polka and your feet long to dance? Will you ever relinquish being belle of the ball to be a matron?"

"I, I,..." Scarlett tried to give a valid retort back, but she could think of nothing that would hold any weight. " Oh what would you know of great ladies considering how you are not even received anymore and, and..."

"No, I am not received anymore, except by great ladies. My mother for one, though the argument I'm sure could be made that as her son and her first born of course she would receive me. But then Mrs. Wilkes receives me." Rhett sharpened his eyes on Scarlett.

Scarlett scoffed. "Melly! Why she has no more sense than a rabbit. She always sees only good in people and never how they truly are!"

"Is that why she cares for you so much? Scarlett, have you ever thought how much Mrs. Wilkes is like your mother? What was your definition again, always kind and forever thinking of others."

"But she's poor as a church mouse, always wearing such dowdy clothes and except for her eyes, she is so plain!" Scarlett protested.

Rhett chuckled. "A compliment from you for Mrs. Wilkes. That is a surprise. Yes, she does have lovely eyes but as I said before, one doesn't have to be rich to be your definition of a great lady. One only needs a heart. "

Scarlett took a sharp breath and her eyes dropped down. Rhett saw that this last comment had hit home to Scarlett. His words weren't meant to wound her, but to make her think. He had gone too far.

" But enough of this topic, I am sure you are bored with it. Have I ever told you about the time I was almost scalped by an Indian?"

Scarlett had stopped listening. She felt shaken and heart sore. Rhett's words were slowly sinking in, making her face things that she had never thought through before. For so long she had imagined that one day, she would become the lady her mother had been. When she had the time and the money behind her, she would be able to be kind and gentle. Children would love her and people would talk about what a great lady Scarlett O'Hara was, not only was she beautiful but loving and giving to others. Then Scarlett would be happy, her life complete.

Rhett continued on with his story, embellishing the facts to the point it was becoming a fantastical tall tale, knowing all the while that Scarlett was no longer listening to him. He was watching Scarlett's face, seeing how his words had made her think of her dream of being just that, a dream, a fantasy, to be the Great Lady, Mistress of the Manor, Lady Bountiful. He could see how the reality was setting in her mind. There was no magic wand or large enough bank account to change what had been in the past, what was now or what would be in the future. For all she wanted it, her wish would not come true.

"And so the first head of the dragon is maimed and in time will die", thought Rhett. This did not make him feel a great sense of joy, for it was like having to shoot a favourite horse that had broken his leg. You had to kill it to put it out of it's pain and hurt, even though it would cause pain and hurt. And that is what Scarlett had to be rid of, her past childhood dreams.

As always with Scarlett, when she could not change things she would ignore them until she had the time and the strength to deal with them, to think of them tomorrow. But the tomorrow never came and after a time, she would not forget about them so much as put them so far back in her mind that they no longer bothered her. She put away in the back of her mind Rhett's words of great ladies for the time being and she focused her thoughts on the the more immediate things she hoped to change. And what she wanted to change most was her husband's apparent lack of interest in her. Every morning she woke alone and when she looked at her image in the mirror, she told herself, "I am Scarlett O'Hara of Tara, I am beautiful, I am strong and I will get what I want." All thoughts of Ashley and great ladies were gone from her mind. The only thing she wanted and worried over was having Rhett desire her. She didn't question why having her husband yearn for her meant so much to her, but she was consumed with it.

"Maybe he thinks that now he has me as his wife, he no longer has to woo me. I am now just an ornament on his arm." But if he saw how other men wanted her, maybe that would make him see how lucky he was to have her and how he needed to be a true husband to her.

Scarlett's eyes were cat-like as she envisioned Rhett wanting her, wanting her lips, her kisses. She imagined him taking her into his powerful arms and holding her upright as his lips kissed her in that all consuming way, that made her head spin and her pulse race.

She took extra care in dressing that last night on the ship. She chose, after much thought and debate, a bronze taffeta gown that made her look as if she had been dipped in molten metal, the bodice fitting tightly to her torso and the skirt sweeping away from her hips. The arms, breast and train was trimmed in black lace and sprinkled with small gold diamantes that captured the gaslight and sparkled. The bodice of the dress was cut dangerously low in front and her corset was tightly laced giving her bosom an extra lift. Mammy would have insisted it ' tweren't fitting' and forbidden her to have been seen in public in such a gown. And Scarlett herself knew it wasn't really 'fittin' for dinner on a ship but she knew it would capture a man's eye. And she so wanted to catch one man's eye. She dabbed her cologne behind each ear and with a smile gave one drop between her breasts. She then brushed her cheeks with a touch of rouge and gave her already red lips a taste of lip stain.

Jane, the carrot topped Irish stewardess who had acted as Scarlett's lady's maid throughout the voyage, stood gaping wide mouthed. "Ah,ma'am, you have taken me breath away. None are as beautiful as ye. And I doubt any could hold a candle to ye. Your husband will fall in love with ye all over again!"

"Thank you Jane. From your lips to God's ear, as my Pa would have said." Scarlett smiled at her reflection. She was pleased with what she saw. She hoped that Rhett would be as pleased. "You may go now, Jane. I won't be needing you again tonight. " Scarlett had already decided that Rhett should be the one to help her undress tonight.

A tap came at the door and Rhett entered the cabin. Jane bobbed a curtsy and said "Evenin' Captain Butler. Good night, ma'am." and made her way out the doorway.

Rhett stood gazing at Scarlett, at the dress, the face paint. He felt a tightening in his groin and took a quick intake of air. How he wanted her. His thoughts flashed to pulling her into his arms and on to the bed, tearing the dress from her body and kissing her lips until she would have no need for lip stain. He wanted to run his hands over the smooth softness of her creamy skin and feel her hair brushing over him. He wanted to make her cry out for him, blocking all thoughts of anything but him. He wanted to taste her and breathe in her scent. To ravish her and capture her as his own.

But instead Rhett forced his face into a neutral expression and with a small bow asked, "Hungry, my dear?"

Though Scarlett was slightly surprised and disappointed that Rhett had no comment on her appearance, she softened her eyelids and sensuously smiled as she curtsied in return to him. "Aren't I always?"

Entering the ship's dining room, it was as if time stopped momentarily and the room went silent. The men drank in Scarlett's beauty as though hypnotized and the women gaped with astonishment and envy. Many a husband woke the following day with bruised legs after their shins were kicked by their wives as Scarlett walked by with a slight tantalizing sway to her hips.

At the Captain's table, the reaction was much the same though Captain Perry gave Rhett a discreet look to try and read his friend's thoughts. Though Rhett's eyes were bland he was holding himself with a tension, as though ready for a fight.

James' eyes were wide open and so was his mouth as he stood transfixed by Scarlett.

Rhett gracefully pulled a chair out for Scarlett and seated her. Still James stood until he finally realized everyone had taken their places. Blushing, he clumsily seated himself, knocking over a glass of water as he did so.

"Captain Perry, I don't know how to tell you how lovely I find your ship. It has been a wonderful voyage and all smooth sailing, isn't that what they say?" Scarlett made sure to lower her chin and look up at the Captain through her dark lashes.

"Thank you Mrs. Butler. I am glad you enjoyed it. Rhett,I wanted to ask you for your thoughts on the newer steamships coming out of England.."

Scarlett turned her green gaze to James, the first mate. She cooed to him "My, Mr. Clark, I am so glad I have the pleasure to dine one last time with such a charming companion."

James blushed and stammered "Why thank you Mrs. Butler. But I'll be on the.." mesmerized by the slightly tilted emerald eyes that seem to offer all the world's delights, James lost his train of thought and his ability to speak.

Scarlett waited for a minute, enjoying the confusion she was causing in this young fool and wondering if he always went red when speaking with a lady. "I'm sorry, on the what?" she murmured softly leaning slightly towards him. She hoped that Rhett was noticing how all the men were watching her.

"On the ahh..The California." James sputtered, thankful to have at last regained the gift of speech and the process of thought.

"Oh, how lucky for me. Then we'll be able to dine together again? Won't we? You do promise, don't you? I'm sure you have so many exciting tales of the briny sea to tell."

At this point, James glanced over to Captain Butler and though Rhett did not give any outward sign, James realized he was treading on very thin ice. He was at a loss as to how he should respond and all he could do was open and close his mouth, like a goldfish gasping for air.

"Scarlett, did you drop your napkin?" Rhett smoothly drawled as he leaned towards his wife, pressing his fingers into her wrist. He spoke softly into Scarlett's ear," I know what you are up to, my pet, and let me tell you it's not working. All it's doing causing upset to a young man and making you look foolish in your attempts." His voice had the tone of cold steel.

Scarlett pulled her hand away from Rhett, tears welling up in her eyes. She willed herself not to cry. Conversation stopped as the first course was served. Looking down at her bowl of soup, Scarlett felt hot in her face and desperate to be away from people.

She rose to her feet and said quietly, "If you will excuse me, I'm not feeling quite myself. I think I will retire early this evening."

The gentleman rose from the table and Scarlett made her way out of the dining room. Outside, she gulped in the salty air and tried to stop the sickening wrench in her stomach. She quickly made her way to the cabin, thankful she didn't encounter anyone along the way. Once through the cabin door, Scarlett crawled on to the bed and started to weep silently, the tears flowing, washing over her face, soaking the satin pillow.

She couldn't really think why she was weeping, only that she felt sad and lonely and deeply ashamed of herself. She was a married woman whose husband seemingly wanted nothing to do with her. This would not have bothered her once but now she wanted a husband, she wanted Rhett to want her.

Ever since that night in New Orleans when she had been so wanton, Rhett had changed. He seemed to not care anymore and was only suffering her company because he was now married to her. Why did this thought hurt so much?

Rhett silently came in the cabin and looked at Scarlett, still dressed in her fine gown, curled up small on the bed, facing away from him. He walked over to the bed and sat upon the edge. Scarlett felt his weigh shift the mattress. Still her tears streamed down her face. She was to despondent to even acknowledge him. What did it matter, he didn't care, why should she?

Without a word, Rhett started to stroke Scarlett's hair. He poured out all the love from his heart into his hands, hoping to soothe her, to let her know without words.

Scarlett's tears stopped falling and dried on her cheeks making her skin feel tight. She turned her head and looked at Rhett, her eyes were still filled with sorrow, Rhett could see the heartache in them. He rose and went to the wash basin. He poured some of the water from the heavy ewer into the bowl and soaked out a soft towel. Wringing it out he returned to the bed.

Tenderly, he washed Scarlett's face. Scarlett's eyes continued looking at him, wanting something from him. Rhett the took each of her small hands and wiped them with the damp towel. He gave each wrist a light kiss, feeling the erratic beating of her pulse. Their eyes met and they both tried to communicate to one another. Each trying without words to express their feelings. Neither was successful.

Rhett finally broke the silence. "We will be landing in Aspinwall tomorrow morning. From there we will board a train to Panama City."

Scarlett nodded. She didn't really care anymore. All she knew was she was away from everything and everyone she had ever known. Far from her home and with someone she thought she had known but now seemed to be a stranger.

"Shall I help you out of your lovely gown?" Rhett lifted her by her hands and helped Scarlett step out of the dress. His fingers deftly unlaced her corset and he turned to the mahogany chest and got out a soft nightgown. Scarlett stood standing still as though she was a lost little girl.

"Do you need more help or can you manage the rest yourself?" Scarlett simply looked down. Rhett removed the rest of her undergarments and slipped the fine lawn material over her.

"To bed, my dear." He led her back to the bed and tucked the covers around her. With a soft kiss to her forehead, Rhett murmured, "Pleasant dreams darling Scarlett. Sleep well."

He watched as her eyes fluttered before finally closing. She gave a shaky sigh and then she slept.

 

 


	10. Be to her virtues very kind, Be to her faults a little blind.

_**Chapter 10** _

_**Be to her virtues very kind,** _

_**Be to her faults a little blind.** _

_**\- Matthew Prior** _

_"Scarlett, it's time to wake up... Scarlett."_

_Scarlett's consciousness slowly broke through the tangled threads of sleep. She felt a tender hand lightly brushing the hair away from her face. She smelt Rhett's shaving soap and his cologne. Rhett was the only man she knew who wore scent and didn't smell like a lady's dress shop._

_"Mmm... where do you get your cologne?" Scarlett mumbled. Her eyes fought against the morning light shining through the porthole._

_Rhett softly chuckled, "In London. Do you like it?"_

_"Very much. It is so much a part of you." Scarlett yawned and tried to open her sleep-laden eyes. She stretched out her full length, her toes feeling the coolness of the sheets and her arms reaching out from the bed covers. Her eyes finally lost the battle and peeked open. There was her very handsome husband, beaming down at her. The angles of his face, his deep pitch-black eyes with his strong brow above gave him the look of an adventurer, a highway man, a buccaneer. The slight lines at the corners of his eyes showed his life had not always been one of leisure but of time at sea and rough living. His lips, which could be soft as a feather's touch or firm and possessive, were full and sensual._

_"Good morning." Scarlett softly whispered._

_"And a very good morning to you, my dear. Did you sleep well?"_

_Scarlett lifted her hand to stroke Rhett's dark face but he flinched away from her as if her touch was repulsive to him._

_Scarlett's waking mind finally broke through, taking her thoughts rushing back to last night, of her foolish attempts at making Rhett jealous, of the dress, of the spectacle she had made of herself._

_"Oh" Scarlett's eyes started to fill with tears as the shame flooded over her. She turned her head away from Rhett's stern look, embarrassed and humiliated. There was a sudden stillness in the room._

_Then Rhett put his hand on her cheek and turned her face back to him. "Look at me, Scarlett." Rhett sombrely spoke. "Look at me, I said." She reluctantly raised her teary eyes up to him._

_"It's over, it's gone, it's in the past. I don't want you to think of last night ever again. Put it out of mind and out of memory." He stroked her hair and gazed down at her, absorbing her incredible beauty. "Really, it was nothing so terrible, the sun has still come up and I'm pretty sure the moon will rise tonight too." Rhett's quiet words and kind touch soothed her and gave her back some of her strength. Scarlett blinked the tears away and nodded her head._

_"There, better?"_

_She nodded again. She took a deep shuddering breath. "Rhett..."_

_"Yes?"_

_"Rhett... would you kiss me?" Scarlett asked timidly. If he would kiss her and seem to want her then, well then things would be better, somehow._

_Rhett hesitated for a second and then gave a slight smile. "Why of course, Scarlett. You need only to ask." He bent his head to kiss her on the velvet down of her cheek but Scarlett was quick and turned her face so his lips met with hers. Rhett seemed to want to shy away but Scarlett slipped her hands around his neck, feeling the crisply cut hair and the strength of his neck and pulled him deeper into the kiss. She felt his tense muscles start to relax as if he was surrendering to the kiss. Her spirits rose and she became more passionate for his lips. All those sensations that Scarlett remembered from Rhett's previous kisses came surging back. Her head swam and all rational thought was lost. How she had missed this. Her back started to arch towards his chest, wanting him closer, wishing she could free herself from the bed covers but constrained by them. Her fingers from one hand made their way to the front of his crisp white shirt, fumbling to undo his buttons and feel the warmth of his skin, feel the rough hair on his chest. Her other hand all the while holding him to the kiss, frightened to let him break away from her, to leave her. Rhett's lips played with hers, firm and teasing. Scarlett parted her lips slightly, begging silently for more. She tried to let him know how she wanted him, with her lips and her hands she tried to silently convey her desire, her want for him._

_A brisk tap came at the cabin door and Jane entered carrying a heavy tray._

_"Mornin' ma'am." she cheerily called. "Oh, Jesus, Mary, Mother of God! Captain Butler, I'm so sorry, I didn't know you were here, I'll go. I'm so sorry." Jane's face was beet red with embarrassment as she clumsily set the tray down, rattling the china. "Sorry, sorry."_

_Rhett sleekly broke from Scarlett's embrace and running his hands through his hair, he rose up from the bed. Straightening his black ribbon tie, he smiled over at Jane._

_"No, Jane, no need to apologize, I must get back outside now anyway. Scarlett, I asked Jane to bring you a breakfast tray as I know you must be hungry and the food on the train leaves much to be desired. We should be docking in about an hour. I'll be up on deck when you are ready." Making his way to the door, Rhett glanced back at his lovely wife lying in the rumbled bedclothes and with the most tantalizing pout of vexation on her face. He grinned and his eyes glowed. All was going forward as he hoped. He felt that one of his dragon's three heads was partially cut and would be severed, given time. But he was glad of Jane's interruption, for his ability to withstand the superficial delights of Scarlett had been sorely tested._

_Scarlett lay in the tousled bed, angry at Jane's interruption, frustrated with Rhett's behaviour and unsure of what she felt. Oh, what was this all about? Why did she want him, why didn't he want her? Everything was topsy-turvy and none of it made any sense._

_"Ma'am, Missus Butler...Ma'am, I'm so sorry to have interrupted."_

_"Oh Jane, it doesn't matter." Scarlett scowled. But it did matter. But why did it matter so much? If only he would act like other men. If he would beg for her kisses and shower her with compliments, she would know how to respond. But the shoe was firmly on the other foot and she was the one begging for his kisses. Scarlett's mind tried to make reason of it all._

_"I'm sure Captain Butler isn't pleased with me right now." Jane continued on. "I only hope one day I'll have a husband that will love me as much as your Captain loves you."_

_"More you know." Scarlett grimaced, a sharp pain dug into the pit of her stomach._

_"Well, of course I know. Anyone with eyes in their head can see how much he loves you. You just have to see him looking at you to know. Why a blind man could see it."_

_"Ah Jane. You read too many fairy tales or penny dreadfuls." Scarlett's lip started to quiver. If only..., if only what? Jane's words were true? That was almost laughable. Rhett didn't love her nor she him. Theirs was a marriage of..of... "Enough of this silliness. I need to get dressed and I need some of that coffee there. We best move along." Scarlett threw back the covers of the bed and rose up, forcing herself to meet the day._

_No matter how bad Scarlett felt, the process of dressing herself and having her hair styled always gave her the strength to do battle with whatever. In less than the hour Rhett have given her, Scarlett was up on deck. She was dressed in a fine travel suit of deep mauve silk overlaid with a cut-away ivory coloured skirt. A matching short tightly fitted jacket trimmed with purple embroidery came to just below her bustline. Perched on the curls Jane had given her hair was a dainty straw hat, dressed with ivory dotted net that graced over her eyes and three dark purple ostrich plumes curved over her left ear._

_Scarlett had given Jane a tip of five dollars for her services with the strict reminder not to waste it on silly books, but to look towards her future._

_"You must rely on yourself, Jane, and no one else. There is no Prince Charming on a white charger except in fairy tales."_

_Scarlett kept her chin held high and her eyes focused forward as she passed the other passengers gathered on the deck. Their eyes followed the slim attractive woman that seemed to cause a storm of envy and desire in her wake. Scarlett didn't notice, her mind was concentrating on finding Rhett and seeing his approving smile._

_As she made her way to the fore of the ship, she felt the penetrating warmth of the sun on her back and was thankful for the cooling breeze off the ocean. The sky was a topaz blue with a scattering of high white clouds. In the distance, Scarlett could make out the dark green of the nearing coastline._

_Captain Perry stepped out on the deck just as Scarlett was approaching the bridge._

_"Mrs. Butler." He bowed gracefully and took Scarlett's small lace-gloved hand in his large calloused one._

_"Captain Perry." Scarlett smiled shyly as she gave a simple curtsy to him. She was still slightly embarrassed from last night._

_"I am glad I have the opportunity to say good-bye to you Ma'am." Captain Perry said in his low gravely voice. "It has been my great pleasure to have met you, Mrs. Butler. I have known your Rhett for more years than either of us would be able to count and honestly, I never thought he would marry. Since meeting you I understand why he finally did. Take care of him and of yourself. Stay strong, for that is your finest quality and the one that sets you apart from the rest. I hope to see you again when I am invited to your first child's christening.' Captain Perry's blue eyes twinkled with kindness. He bowed again and with his apologies that he must check on the other passengers, he left Scarlett standing alone and feeling somewhat dumbstruck._

_Rhett stepped out onto the deck from the bridge and saw Scarlett standing as if lost._

_"Scarlett, how pretty you look. That dress is most becoming to you."_

_Never being one to pass up a compliment, Scarlett fluttered her lashes and smiled at Rhett. "Why thank you Rhett. I'm glad you like the dress. You paid good money for it."_

_Rhett chuckled. "And it was worth every cent to see you so attractively gowned. We will be docking in a few minutes and then we'll board a train. I hope this won't be too exhausting for you."_

_"Where will the train go?"_

_"To the west coast, to the Pacific Ocean."_

_"God's teeth Rhett, that will take days!"_

_"No, not days, hours. About six roughly, as long as there's no alligators on the tracks."_

_Scarlett peered suspiciously at Rhett. Oh he must be teasing her! Imagine crossing a whole country in six hours! Ridiculous, why it took more than six hours to go from Atlanta to Augusta!_

_Together they stood at the ship's rail and watched as the Saragossa drew closer to Panama. Scarlett felt safe and protected standing close to Rhett. She went over in her mind what Captain Perry had said to her. " Her strength set her apart from the others." What others? How many women had Rhett known, how many had he loved? The sharp prick of jealousy darted her. Yet he married me. Even though he doesn't love me, for all Jane's silly talk. Why? Because I am strong? That makes no sense at all. Men married women for beauty or money or standing, not for their strength._

_The ship slowly eased it's way into the harbour and finally made it's berth. Scarlett's first impression of Aspinwall was the incredible stench. Never had she smelt such a rank foulness in the air. She pulled her small lace-edged hankie from her reticule and breathed into it's delicate scent._

_Rhett, glancing down at her, laughed. "They are a bit backward here in regards to drains."_

_The wharf was teeming with people of every colour. Black, brown, yellow and a few whites. Small, ramshackle stands dotted the sides of the pier. Men sat bare chested, loudly touting their rum and brandy. Women, garbed in no more than ill-fitting, ragged shimmies, were selling cigars and smoking their own wares. Small children, naked as the day they were born, ran about, shouting and laughing. No one seemed to wear shoes and none of them seemed to speak English._

_Scarlett's eyes widened at the sights and the cacophony of noise and Rhett smiled, enjoying her wonder at the chaos. The ship's gangplank was lowered and they made their way to the dock. Scarlett felt the hot sticky air surround her and rise under her skirts. Her legs felt wobbly, as if she was still at sea and she slightly wavered but Rhett quickly put his arm around her waist._

_"You still have your sea legs. Don't worry, it won't last long." He bent to whisper in her ear, "And I have never seen such shapely legs before."_

_Scarlett's mouth twitched with a smile, savouring both the compliment and his strong arm around her waist. She said "Rhett, can't these people afford clothes? The folk at Tara were better dressed than they are." Her eyes caught sight of a heavy yellowish woman openly feeding her baby, her large breasts exposed to all and no one seemed the least bit shocked._

_Rhett could tell Scarlett many tales of Aspinwall. Bottle Alley, where two bit whores plied there trade and a man would be lucky not to end up with a lasting unwanted memory of her or a knife in his back. In Aspinwall's many bars, men would walk in wealthy with the gold they had mined in California and two days later were broke and beaten, desperate to get out of Aspinwall and back to California. This wasn't a town of good folk or society._

_"Come, the train will be leaving soon and I don't think the sights of Aspinwall would hold any charm for you." With a firm hold on Scarlett, Rhett pushed their way through the crowds and made their way to the train station._

_The platform had more people selling rum, cigars, bananas, all calling out. Passengers, overly laden with baggage, were pushing their way towards the train which was noisily hissing with steam. Chickens running loose, small children darting here and there and a conductor blaring his shrill whistle added to the feeling of pandemonium. Rhett guided Scarlett through the throng of people, keeping her close by his side, as they made their way to the first car. They paused so Scarlett could watch a small monkey on a chain doing tricks for treats from his young master, a wiry, brown boy with a grin on his face and his hand outstretched for coins. The monkey doffed his own little straw hat for a coin or two. Scarlett's eyes were bright and alive with it all._

_Rhett felt a rush of pride for his charming travel companion. Scarlett seemed to be enjoying the adventure of the new and the unfamiliar, whereas most young ladies would have been disgusted by it or fainting with it. She was no wilting violet, his wife. His wife! Rhett squeezed her tighter towards him, his eyes sparkling and his mouth grinning with his own happiness._

_They stepped up on to the train. Inside, instead of windows, there were wicker blinds, shading the sun but permitting any breath of air to flow through. They gave a pretty, somewhat sensuous light to the car. Scarlett looked to Rhett as to where they would be seated._

_"The car is ours. One of the perks of being a major stockholder in the Panama Railroad Company." Rhett drew her to a row of cane bottomed seats with soft cushions. " It was one of my first investments and it has done very well for me over the years though I'm thinking of selling the shares soon."_

_"But why, Rhett, if it has done so well for you?"_

_"There has been serious talk of cutting a canal through Panama. One that would permit ships to sail from one coast to the other. It won't be easily done and it won't be soon, but the railway will be useless after it's completed. But I'm sure I can find some fool to buy my shares as they haven't been available for public sale in many years. Look to the future, Scarlett. That is where the money is found."_

_"Now you sound like some old man, Rhett."_

_"Well, I guess I am an old man compared to you. How old are you Scarlett?"_

_"Old enough to know better than to tell my age, thank you!" They both laughed as the train whistle screamed and the final passengers scrambled on board. Slowly the train lurched and pulled it's way out of the station with the children racing beside it, laughing and calling out "Uno peso, por favor Senorita, Senor!"_

_Very soon, the dust and stench of Aspinwall was gone and the train made it's way through thick jungle. Tall, wide trees with heavy vines entwined on them, canopied the track. The air felt thicker and Scarlett used her papier poudres to blot her upper lip and gently waved her fan. Rhett rolled up blinds on each side of the car so Scarlett could see flashes of scarlet red, bright blues and the deep shades of green as birds flew. Slowly they made their way past hovels, built on stilts with roofs of palm leaves and walls of reeds. Their owners stood silently as the train made it's way past._

_A loud roar sounded over the steady rumble of the train's engine. Scarlett gripped Rhett's arm._

_"Is there lions here in Panama?"_

_"No, those are howler monkeys. Look up in that tree there. Do you see them?"_

_A colony of large black monkeys gambolled in the thick tree branches, small babies clung tightly to their mothers, pairs groomed each other and others swung effortlessly from one branch to another. Scarlett crossed back and forth from one side of the car to the other, laughing at the monkey's play and fascinated by the brightly coloured birds and the strange, exotic flowers that grew so abundantly._

_All the while, Rhett smiled on at his Scarlett. This was what he wanted to give to her A delight in the new and the different that the world could offer._

_A sudden jolt shuddered the train to a slow stop and it sat puffing noisily beside a muddy creek. Rhett put his head out the window and grinned back at Scarlett._

_"An alligator on the tracks. Would you like to see it?" Taking Scarlett by her hand, he led her to the doorway. Jumping down on the gravel rail bed, he held out his arms and swept her down off the train They walked arm in arm towards the engine and there straddling the tracks was a large, long alligator sunning itself. The engineer and the fireman stood staring at the beast._

_"Why he has the same eyes as Sherman!" Scarlett wryly commented._

_Rhett threw back his head and laughed. The alligator slowly moved it's head towards the sound. The men then took some long sticks and poked gingerly at the the beast who, with it's jaws wide open showing it's many sharp teeth, heaved itself off the tracks and into the shallow water, submerging until just it's cold, yellow eyes were showing._

_With many relieved laughs and back slaps, the men climbed back up to the engine and Scarlett and Rhett returned to their private car._

_The rest of the trip was uneventful. Rhett had arranged for a hamper of food from the ship and they feasted on sandwiches and bottled water and shared a split of champagne. They chatted and bantered with each other. They both flirted as they had in the early days of their honeymoon in New Orleans. By the end of the train trip Scarlett had forgotten her feelings of worry and she felt better than she had in days. Rhett was at his most charming and considerate towards her. His eyes still held a certain wariness but Scarlett chose to ignore it concentrating instead on his kind words and compliments._

_In just over six hours, the train puffed it's way into Panama City on the Pacific. Never in her wildest dreams had Scarlett ever thought she would see the Pacific Ocean. Nor had she ever imagined to be so far from her home in Georgia. They disembarked from the train and once again were surrounded by the native people calling out in their strange words all manner of items for sale. They were better dressed and cleaner and from what she could see, Panama City was a much nicer town than Aspinwall. The passengers made their way to a jetty to be transported to the SS California. Rhett explained to her that the harbour was too shallow for the steamship. Upon embarking, a purser handed Rhett a number of telegraphs._

_The cabin was even more luxurious than on the Saragossa and once again Rhett had arranged for Scarlett's favourite bottled water, chocolates and bouquets of the beautiful native flowers she had admired from the train._

_Scarlett was brimming with happiness. He must care to think of her comfort. All that she needed to make things perfect was for Rhett to take her in his arms and kiss her in that special way. Scarlett hummed a little tune as she took off her gloves and hat. She washed the travel dust from her hands and face in the delicately perfumed water and with a flirtatious smile turned towards Rhett, who was sitting in one of the small upholstered club chairs._

_"What a lovely day this has been!"_

_"Travel agrees with you Scarlett. You should do more of it."_

_"Maybe it's the company as much as the travel." Scarlett dimpled. She perched herself on the arm of Rhett's chair. "What are those wires you are reading, Rhett?"_

_"Here's one for you from Miss Melly." Rhett passed over a thin onion skin._

_Scarlett snatched it from his hand and tearing it open, quickly scanned it for news of the mills and the store._

_Rhett's eyes narrowed as he watched her. "What news does she send?"_

_"Ella has cut another tooth and Wade is now interested in Science." Scarlett tossed the telegram on to the table. "Nothing really."_

_Nothing about Ashley she means, Rhett thought. His mouth tightened and his eyes hardened._

_Scarlett rose up and paced over to the porthole, her mind back on her mills and her very real fear of what kind of mess Ashley was making with them. He had never been left in charge before and Scarlett knew how poor a manager he had turned out to be. They say love is blind but Scarlett's love and pride of the business she had built from practically nothing far outweighed her fondness for Ashley. She glanced over at Rhett with the idea of begging him to return to Atlanta, just for a few weeks so she could straighten out the wreckage things were surely in by now, but one look at the stiffness of his back told her now was not the time to ask. She turned back to the porthole, biting her lip as she imagined how much money had been lost since she had left on this honeymoon._

_"Congratulations on Ella's new tooth."_

_"It's hardly any feat, Rhett. Most children seem to manage it." Scarlett said with a sniff._

_Rhett's jealousy and anger at both Scarlett and himself grew._

_"Wonderful how much you care for your children, Scarlett." Rhett scornfully said._

_Scarlett turned her eyes back to Rhett, watching him as he slowly drew a cheroot from his silver case and lit it, concentrating his eyes on the burning ember. "What do you mean?"_

_Rhett rolled the cigar between his fingers, gazing at the smoke slowly curling up. "Just your maternal nature is somewhat lacking."_

_"What are you implying? Of course I love Wade and Ella."_

_Rhett glanced at her. "Really? Hmm, you have a funny way of showing it." Rhett picked up the telegram from Melly and read over the words. "Ah well, not every woman is meant to be a mother." he said flippantly._

_All the ground in guilt Scarlett had ever felt over her mothering skills flooded over her but she fought it back. "I may not be the story book mother of fairy tales but most of them seemed to die young if I recall correctly. Besides I have done all I could for my children."_

_"Oh really? Aside from giving birth to them, what have you done?"_

_"I kept them alive. Do you have any idea what's it's like to go hungry and to be living every day with the thought of losing everything you ever held dear?"_

_Rhett sneered at her. "You forget, my pet, I was cast out by my family at a young age to make my own way in life."_

_"Oh yes, so you were. And remind me, did you have a child, two sick sisters, a father mad with grief, a sister-in-law recovering from child birth, a sickly baby and five dependent darkies all looking to you for food, for survival? Did you have a defeated army descending on you like a plague of locusts, did you have to battle with a conquering army and the trash that followed behind to try and keep your home? Did you? No, no, you took care of yourself and to hell with all the others. Well, you can go to hell Rhett Butler. You have no right to judge me. I did everything to keep my children fed and safe. Maybe I didn't read them bed time stories or play make believe with them, but I was too busy keeping them alive."_

_Scarlett's chest was heaving with anger and sorrow. Her body was tight trying to stop the tears from falling. She turned back to the porthole, looking out with unseeing eyes. All she could see was the nightmare of those days at Tara, the desperate eyes looking to her for salvation._

_Quietly, Rhett began to speak. "I'm sorry, Scarlett. That was low of me. No one knows better than I how hard you have worked."_

_Scarlett, only partly listening, thought "Melly knows, she knows. Not all of it, but she knows what it was like, the hunger, the cold, the fear, the Yankee..."_

_Softly, almost speaking to herself, Scarlett spoke. "Nobody I thought I could depend upon helped me. My Pa, Frank, Ashley, even you...You all let me down. None of you were there when I needed you most. So I was forced to make my way by myself otherwise what would have happened to my children?"_

_Rhett gently continued. "I once told you I would bet on you against Sherman any day and I would have won that bet." Rhett moved towards Scarlett. He gently stroked her stiff back. "You have fought harder than any woman I know, against greater odds and with less help. And you did it with nothing but your brains, your feminine wiles and your strength. I have always admired your strength, you know." Rhett's own guilt of leaving Scarlett on that dusty road back to Tara started to overwhelm him. He remembered her shock that he was leaving to go and fight with an army that had already lost, not only the battle, but the war, leaving her to make her own way, through a battlefield of dead and dying men to a home that might have been burnt to the ground. And he remembered with shame how he had forced her into a kiss when she was looking for someone to help and protect her._

_"How many ladies could have not only survived but prospered faced with the heavy load you have carried for so long? And you are right Scarlett, your maternal nature did keep not just your children, but many others alive. You should take pride in all that you have achieved. Maybe now you should give yourself permission to some ease and respite from the struggle. You don't need to do it all on your own now."_

_They stood there, both lost in their own thoughts and guilt of things past. Separate and apart from each other. Alone._

**So where did that come from? Sometimes I wonder about my muse. She is a trickster.**

 

 


	11. Truth Uttered Before It's Time is Dangerous

**Chapter 11**

**Truth Uttered Before It's Time is Dangerous- Mencius**

In the long years to follow, Rhett and Scarlett would both always remember the voyage to San Francisco with heartache, with an "if only I had...how things could have been different."

Oh but hindsight always has perfect vision.

The SS California was a beautiful sleek steamship with large paddle wheels on either side that sliced through the waters of the Pacific Ocean. She was a luxurious ship that had been designed with the first class passengers in mind and with the thought of swift passage up the West Coast.

All comforts were available for the higher paying passengers. There was a music room, a Gentlemen's Club Room, an elegant restaurant with large tables for those who wished to meet new people and small ones tucked in secluded alcoves for those that preferred their privacy. The fifty-two staterooms were outfitted with the softest beds, the most sumptuous furnishings and tasteful decor throughout.

The wide teak decks had cushioned deckchairs with warm blankets and a purser was never far away, always at the ready to serve a coffee or a whiskey.

As the ship had pulled away from Panama, fully loaded with three hundred passengers and their luggage and the freight destined for the West Coast of America, Scarlett and Rhett had stood silently. Rhett, breaking through his past to the present, spoke first.

"I will leave you now. There is a telegram there on the table you may be interested in reading. I'm going to my cabin to freshen up. Shall I escort you to dinner in say, forty-five minutes?"

Scarlett turned her eyes to him. "Your cabin, Rhett? Aren't you sleeping here, with me?"

"No my dear. I thought you may prefer a cabin of your own and I doubt whether there would be room for me amongst all your hat boxes. I have the connecting cabin, my door is right there. It isn't locked, if you should need me."

"Oh." Scarlett was bewildered that Rhett didn't even want to share a cabin with her. She had thought that the day had gone so well, he seemed to have enjoyed her company on the train and until that telegram from Melly, things had been pleasant between them. Yet he must have arranged for the connecting cabin before they even got on the ship. She wondered how much he regretted having married her. Again she tried to think why he had wanted her for his wife.

"Is forty-five minutes enough time for you or shall I ask for a later sitting?" Rhett's words barely registered.

"Why did you.., what did you.., I...," Scarlett forced herself to focus on Rhett's words," ah, I..I have a bit of a headache. I think I will just stay here in the cabin." Scarlett stammered. The thought of dressing, of trying to make small talk and choke food down was too much for her. Not now, not tonight. Why would he want to...

Rhett peered closely at Scarlett, she kept her head down but he saw how tightly she was gripping her hands together. "It has been a long day for you, hasn't it? I'm sorry you aren't feeling well. Shall I have a tray sent here for you?"

"Yes, that would be nice...thank you."

Rhett sensed how upset Scarlett was but he was unsure why. Had his criticism of her maternal nature hurt her so much or was it something else?

" Well then, I'll say goodnight to you now. I hope your headache is better in the morning." He paused, waiting for her response. "If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask."

Scarlett nodded and turned back to the porthole not wanting to see the coldness in Rhett's eyes, the polite blankness of his face. He silently came up behind her and holding her gently by the shoulders, he gave the whisper of a kiss to her sweet smelling hair.

Scarlett quivered, sensing him so close to her. She breathed in deeply and turned to say she had changed her mind about the dinner, that her head felt much better but she was too late, the inlaid wooden door was shutting. She stepped towards it, trying to find the words but then stopped. Once again she turned back to the porthole and looked out at the darkening sky.

Rhett dined alone that evening preferring his own company to others. He scanned over his fellow passengers, summing up their financial worth, their politics, their business and their women. This had been his custom since his gambling days and he could read a man well. None of these ones interested him but if he had been looking for a sucker to play poker with, the pickings were fine.

After finishing his coffee and brandy, Rhett made his way to the outer deck, pausing to give his respects to the Captain and introduce himself.

"Ah, Captain Butler, it is a grand honour to meet you. Your reputation precedes you."

"All lies, I assure you, Captain." Rhett drawled. Turning to the captain's left Rhett said, "Mr. MacGregor, how are you enjoying your new posting here on the California?" Rhett clasped James by the shoulder.

"Fine sir. I'm liking it fine." James stuttered.

Captain Pemberton said "Aren't you travelling with your young wife, Captain Butler? I have heard tell of her beauty."

"She chose to take her dinner in her cabin tonight. The day has been a long one for her and she needs her rest so I don't wish her to be disturbed or upset in anyway. I don't want anything to spoil the happiness of her honeymoon. I'm sure you can understand, Mr. MacGregor?" Rhett's fingers dug into James' shoulder and his eyes were as menacing as a snake's when James glanced up at him.

"Of course, sir. I understand." James tried to prevent flinching at the steely strength boring into his shoulder.

Releasing his grip, Rhett gave a firm clap on James' back and smiled coldly. "I'm glad. I will bid you goodnight, gentleman. It has been my pleasure to meet you Captain. " With a short bow, Rhett exited the dining room.

Rhett slowly walked the perimeter of the ship. His foot steps were muffled and his thoughts wandered. He stopped to light a cigar and looked up at the crescent moon, shyly shining above. He bowed low and toasted Luna. With a smirk at his own foolishness, he continued his way along the deck. His mind was filled with images of Scarlett, always Scarlett.

His memory flashed from one picture of her to another. That first sight of her in a green sprigged dress, cut much too low for a daytime party, flirtatious and confident of her beauty and her charms, surrounded by the fine young bloods of the county, all courting her and hoping for her favour. Hearing the oh so turgid words between her and Mr. Wilkes had been both embarrassing and slightly sickening. She was so young and so conceited in her belief that all men must love her. Wilkes had obviously lusted for her but did not want her as his wife. He chuckled softly when he remembered the look of shock on her face when he had made his presence known.

Then the sight of her draped in mourning but with a come hither look in her emerald eyes and a tapping toe of impatience and desire to dance at the ball. Holding her in his arms as they danced, squeezing her small waist until she upbraided him for his forwardness, though she had said it in a half hearted, my mother has taught me kind of way. That was the first of many times that he had tried to buy her love. He remembered the day they went on a picnic outside of Atlanta and she joyfully picked wild flowers to brighten her bedroom and how he had given her his handkerchief to wrap them in. She had smiled and flirted with him, at her coquettish best, offering her lips for a kiss which would have followed with a slap to prove what a lady she was. He hadn't taken up the offer preferring to wait for better things.

He remembered the feel of her lips when he had kissed her, brutalized her on leaving Atlanta. Her viscous words of hate towards him still haunted him. Had she told him she loved him, begged him to stay with her, would he have taken her to Tara or would his stupid Southern Pride have overcome him? He had often wondered this on the long hard marches from one bloody battlefield to the next.

He remembered his overwhelming joy when the young Yankee officer had told him she was there waiting to visit him in jail. She had come to him, garbed in green velvet, acting as if she cared for him, how much he had wanted to believe her, that his return to Atlanta to find her and his subsequent arrest had all been worthwhile because she had come. He again felt the keen pain that had almost killed him when he had discovered her little act had been nothing more than attempt to get her pretty paws on his money. God he would give all his money, everything he owned if only she would love him. And when he had finally called in every marker he had and been released from jail, instead of leaving Georgia forever, what had he done, scampered over to Aunt Pitty's to ensure she was alright. The pure revolt he had felt on discovering 'his' Scarlett had sold herself for three hundred dollars to a man like Frank Kennedy had caused him to go on a three day drunk. But still he had stayed in Atlanta.

He remembered their rides out to the mills, her too thin face filled with worry and fear but determined to survive. So many times he had wanted to take her in his arms and whisper in her ear that he would make it all better, that she never had to worry as long as he was there - and he always would be there. Rhett knew that no matter what happened with this marriage, he would never be free of her. The hope of what could be would always stronger than the fear of what may not be.

And then his thoughts went to the first time she was in his bed. Her nerves and timidness had surprised him. She had seemed almost virginal and he had taken even more care with her. He had wanted to show her how much he loved her, to be comfortable with him, not frightened or embarrassed of lovemaking but to enjoy it. He wanted her to to want him. That night in New Orleans, when she had seemed to be giving way to her instincts, he thought maybe she was starting to feel something for him. But then the cold splash of reality had hit. Her sighs were not for him but were her longing for that damned Ashley Wilkes. Disgusted, Rhett threw his cigar into the ocean, watching the sparks scatter out before being extinguished.

Rhett gazed up at the blue black sky. A shooting star fell from the heavens. He smiled, recalling how his father's man, Pete, had told him once how to wish on a shooting star would bring his heart's desire. Rhett made his wish, with a tremor of despair that his ultimate desire would never be fulfilled and he was destined to live with this merciless craving until the end of his life.

In his cabin, Rhett made himself ready for bed. He undressed, methodically hanging his jacket and pants, neatly folding his shirt. The sheets were cold as he climbed into bed. He had always slept naked before but out of consideration of Scarlett's modesty and his own worry of his subconscious actions, he had worn his underdrawers to bed for the last fortnight. It felt good to be naked again.

He lay there feeling the bed slowly warm with his body. As was typical of Rhett, he hadn't told Scarlett the whole truth in regards to having his own cabin. He was finding it more and more difficult to sleep beside her. She had the tendency of curling her small body towards his, her breasts would gently brush against him, her legs would twine their way between his and she would softly murmur little groans and whispers in the night. It took all his strength not to touch the softness of her skin and caress her body, to take her as his wife. The worst of it was her actions were totally innocent, she had no idea, no scheme, no plan. She was simply looking for warmth and comfort.

Rhett had sworn to himself upon his marriage to Scarlett that he would never covet another woman nor betray his vow to stay true to his wife. He didn't want any other woman but her, yet his desire and his need of release made sleep difficult, especially when she was so close and so tempting.

Rhett closed his eyes and prepared himself for sleep. He listened as the paddle wheels churned their way north, the lap and splash of the water soothing to his ears. His body and mind were tired. Tired from the constant tightness of holding himself in check, watching every word he spoke and trying to make her see. One thing he knew about Scarlett, by telling her something she would fight against it, it had to come from her own thought. He had to lead her towards the truth, and then let her discover it for herself, God would she ever see? Would it be easier just to say it, explain it all? Easier yes, but so very dangerous. It would be another weapon she could use against him, something to mock him with and use as a whip over him. Better to live in his own private hell than have her know the truth and taunt him for loving her.

Rhett breathed a deep sigh and turned on his side. Sleep would not come easily that night. He tried to empty his mind and rest.

Scarlett's face, her bewitching smile, her cat like eyes hovered in his thoughts. Just there, so close, the image of her in his mind's eye. He felt himself start to harden and like an adolescent boy, he touched himself. Slowly, he began to stroke and pull. Visions of Scarlett, naked and reaching towards him floated in his mind. He could see her perfectly formed body, her slim thighs rounding up to her hips, the curve of her tiny waist meeting with the fullness of her breasts. He imagined her long black hair entangled in his hands, swirling about his face as she kissed him deeply. He thought of her calling his name, begging for his touch. He could feel her delicate hands caressing him, her nails stroking his back and clenching his buttocks, pulling him deeper into her as she pushed herself towards him. He envisioned her small hand moving up between his thighs and gently kneading and rubbing his genitals as her moist lips kissed him and her tongue licked and sucked on him. Quicker and more firmly his hand drew along. His breath came faster, his fantasy of Scarlett, crying for him and pleasuring him as he pleasured her in the delight of their joining became more fervid. His body tensed as his hand stroked faster, his heart beat rapidly and the images swirled into a whirlpool until with a soft groan, came the final release.

He lay there, feeling his heart slow and his breath deepen. The fantasy of Scarlett receded, leaving him feeling empty and alone. His eyes gazed over to the connecting door, hoping to see a glimmer of light between the cracks, but all was dark. The constant yearning dug into him and he closed his eyes, trying to make his mind blank. After a long time, restless sleep came.

With a soft tap on the door, Rhett entered Scarlett's cabin.. There was Scarlett sitting up in bed, a breakfast tray beside her and papers strewn over the bedcovers. She was scribbling away with a small golden pencil on a sheet of paper, her brow furrowed in thought. Her long black hair showered over her shoulders and her thin lawn nightgown barely concealed the deep red of her nipples. Rhett's thoughts went back to his visions of last night and he took a deep breath to fight down his longing.

Scarlett glanced up and with a huge smile on her face, she jumped off the bed and ran to him. Pressing her petite form against him as she wrapped her arms tightly around his slim waist, she cried out "Rhett, oh Rhett, thank you! You are so good to me. How did you know how worried I've been?"

Rhett started to enclose her in his arms, almost giving in to her and to his own longing. He made himself think of ice cold water and Mrs. Merriweather to

break her spell.

"Worried my dear? What has caused you to worry?"

"Well, the mills of course." Scarlett releasing Rhett from her tight embrace. "I have been so concerned about what has been happening without me there in Atlanta but the telegram is filled with such wonderful news."

She turned away, Rhett noticed the lovely roundness of her bottom as she scrambled back onto the bed. The diaphanous nightgown was more accenting of her charms than concealing of them. Rhett thought how he must send the Sisters of Ursuline a large cheque for their Church as an anonymous thank you for their mastery with women's lingerie. Maybe they would say prayers for him to save him from his wicked thoughts.

Picking up the thin onion skin, Scarlett read " 'Expenditures have regrettably increased by ten percent but due to profits having risen by thirty percent, I believe the outlay is justified.' I have been going over the numbers and both mills are making more money than ever! Especially the one that Ash..." Scarlett stumbled to a stop, not sure if she should continue, feeling as though she owed some loyalty towards Ashley though he really was the worst manager and his mill seemed to never make any money at all.

Rhett could see the conflict on Scarlett's face, money or love, what a difficult choice for her.

"So the esteemed has feet of clay." Rhett sleekly said as he sat on the edge of the bed, his eyes scanning over the strewn papers.

Scarlett wasn't quite sure what Rhett meant because Ashley was always very light on his feet, though Rhett was the better dancer and what did feet have to do with the mills? She thought it best to ignore his riddles and besides there was so much else to question him about.

"And Johnnie Gallagher threatened to quit! I'm not sure that would be such a bad thing but I do need a manager and it is so hard to get someone capable. Who is this man, Scott Thompson, that wrote the telegram, Rhett?"

"He's from Tennessee. I fought with him under Hood, he lost an eye and a leg during the Battle of Franklin. He once was president of a large bank in Nashville but the Yankees took it over and he's been at loose ends. I asked him to oversee your interests while we are away." Rhett stretched his torso over the end of the bed taking a piece of toast from the breakfast tray.

"What about the store, there is no mention of it. " Scarlett asked.

"I asked him to watch over that as well, but as the mills are in the most need of supervision, I told him to concentrate on them. I'm sure by the time we get to San Francisco he will have wired me again, detailing how things are with your emporium."

"How much is he charging? Am I paying him?"

Rhett chuckled lowly. "No, my dearest Shylock, I am."

"Well in that case, I think you should double his salary." Scarlett grinned back at him.

Scarlett continued to chatter away, showing Rhett the wire and pointing out the figures. She gave him her scribblings and additions. Rhett gazed on at her. Her eyes were bright and her face was alive. Not since that day in the jewellery shop in New Orleans had Rhett seen her so happy. Rhett slowly realized how her mind must have been stagnating having been so long away from her businesses. Was it the mills she was missing and not her dear Ashley? The thought gave him pause.

For the following fortnight, Scarlett and Rhett returned to the comfortable companionship they had shared during her marriage to Frank. They were able to speak easily and freely with one another as friends again.

They discussed her businesses. They made plans for establishing a lumberyard beside the store for the general public to buy small lots of shingles and boards. They debated whether Scarlett should find a supplier of bricks or if she should start her own brick works. They talked about Rhett using his connections up North to supply items which the growing Yankee population of Atlanta wanted, things like maple syrup, dried cranberries and salted cod.

They kept to themselves with little interaction with the other passengers other than polite nods and simple words on the weather. They walked for miles around the ship's deck each day, considering and deliberating one idea after another. Scarlett woke every morning excited to discuss more and tell Rhett her latest scheme. Scarlett delighted in knowing that she could talk to Rhett about money and the making of it. She valued his opinion and often when she caught the look of approval in his eye as she explained another idea she would swell with pride.

Scarlett chose to have her dinner on a tray each night, preferring to keep away from the other passengers, still somewhat shy of others and not wanting to spoil the delicate balance she was enjoying with Rhett. Some nights Rhett would join her and she would take great care with her appearance for she still wanted him to find her attractive but most often he dined alone in the restaurant.

One day Rhett came into her cabin and handed a book to Scarlett.

"What's this Rhett? You know I don't read novels."

"It's not a novel. It's a book of history I discovered in the ship's library. I think you may find it interesting."

" 'Great Ladies of History' " Scarlett started to feel on guard. Was he going to bring up that again?

"Are you suggesting I need to read a book to become a lady? I'll have you know that..." Scarlett started to hiss with indignation.

Rhett cut her off, " Yes, I do know. You are descended from the great family Robillard and you have aristocratic blood etc., etc. I am not implying anything. I just thought it may amuse you. Give it a chance, Scarlett, You may learn something."

That night eating her solitary dinner, Scarlett picked up the volume, more out of boredom than interest. Soon she was engrossed in the lives of Catherine the Great, Elizabeth R and Eleanor of Aquitaine.

The following morning she was bubbling over with questions and thoughts. Rhett happily answered her questions and made her blush by telling her things about these great women that were not in the book. Scarlett was fascinated to hear that though known as the Virgin Queen, it was only because Elizabeth had never married, that Catherine had used men, taken them as lovers to advance her plans for Russia and that Eleanor had presided over a Court of Love in which young lovers would bring their questions to her.

"The most famous of these cases was whether true love could exist in a marriage." Rhett told her.

"Well, of course it can!" Scarlett said.

"Just like in your marriages, my dear?" Rhett smirked. "Eleanor decided it couldn't, though I am sure many would argue the point."

The days on the California passed pleasantly enough for them both. Thoughts and longings were kept firmly at bay until the connecting door was closed for the night. Then dreams and desires came forth to be locked away again with the dawn.

_I hope you all are giving Rhett the benefit of the doubt. He is really not so bad a man. And there is some method to his madness._

 

 


	12. THOU ART TO ME A DELICIOUS TORMENT

**Chapter 12**

**THOU ART TO ME A DELICIOUS TORMENT**

**Ralph Waldo Emerson**

Scarlett vaguely heard the soft click of the latch on the connecting door of Rhett's cabin. She opened her eyes and made out his dark figure pause by the door and then as silently as a shadow, he approached her. The soft mattress shifted as he sat on the side of the bed. The scent of whiskey, cigars and the essence of Rhett lightly filled the air. She could see the light from the porthole glitter in his eyes as he gazed down at her. Again he paused, as if waiting for something. With a sigh, almost a groan, he lifted her small hand and turned it over. Lowering his head, he started to kiss her inner wrist, making her pulse leap as she felt the warmth from his soft lips and the prickle from his moustache. Slowly, he pushed her nightgown's full sleeve up, exposing her inner elbow. His lips moved up, kissing her, his tongue darting out, tasting her. The heat from his mouth ran up her arm and flooded throughout her body. Scarlett was unsure of the sensations welling up within her. She tried to pull away, frightened of what she was feeling, but not wanting it to stop. Rhett's grip tightened and taking her other wrist, pulled her arms over her head, grasping them with one of his strong hands. His broad chest pushed against her breasts, pinning her down against the bed. He was holding her captive and yet she didn't want to be free and she did not fight against his hold. She was reveling in his power over her. She, who had never let any man get the best of her, was subordinate to him. His lips now centered on the quickly beating pulse on her long neck. His lips moved up behind her ear causing a shiver to run up and down her spine. Then he moved back down, passing over her neck toward her collar bone.

"Rhett...," Scarlett murmured.

"Hush, don't speak," Rhett whispered as he moved his mouth to stop her words. His lips started to posess hers and then he faded back.

"Rhett, Rhett, aren't you going to kiss me?"

"Haven't you had enough kisses for one day?" Rhett laughed, his eyes dancing, as his face slowly dissolved away.

"Rhett...don't go..."

Scarlett woke with a start. Her breath was as quick as her heartbeat. She sat up, her eyes wide and and her head dizzy. She felt drunk, yet she was stone cold sober. A soft light shone under the door to Rhett's cabin. Without thought, Scarlett got out of her bed and crossed the soft rug to the doorway. She paused with her hand on the doorknob. Should she knock or just walk in? What would she say - 'I had a dream'? He would, no doubt, ask what it was about. How could she tell him - 'I dreamt you came to my bed and kissed me.' He would either be repulsed or laugh at her, pat her on the head and send her back to her bed like a little girl up past her bedtime.

Scarlett bit her lip deliberating what to say, her mind running through different phrases, different lies, rejecting each one almost as quickly as she thought of it.

The light was extinguished leaving only darkness. Too late - she had lost her chance. She stood still for a long while, willing herself to enter his cabin but finally, with a shiver, she turned away from the impassable door and crawled back into her bed and curled herself up very small. The dream still hovered in her mind. The only man she had ever dreamed of kissing her had been Ashley and even those dreams had been so long ago, dreams of a very young girl. Scarlett tightly closed her eyes, trying to will sleep to come again. She wondered if the dream would return and almost wished for it to continue. Scarlett forced her mind to calculate complicated mathematical problems which usually helped her to fall asleep, but the dream stayed close.

With a short tap on the door, Rhett entered Scarlett's cabin and was surprised to find her sitting in one of the small club chairs, reading the book. She was dressed in a finely tailored travel suit of deep red, trimmed with black mink at the collar and the cuffs.

"Do my eyes deceive me? Is my bride awake?"

Scarlett glanced up at him and held up her finger to shush him.

Rhett nonchalantly sat in the chair opposite Scarlett and watched as her eyes darted along the final pages.

With a sigh, Scarlett closed the book and smiled at Rhett. "Good morning."

"And good morning to you, my dear, but what a surprise to find you awake - dressed - breakfasted?" he indicated the tray on the small table between them that held a coffee pot and a few crumbs left on a plate.

Scarlett nodded. "I've been up for hours and I thought I would finish the book before we arrived."

"Didn't you sleep well?"

"I had a dream.." Scarlett started to say before she gave her head a small shake as if to rid her mind of last night's images.

"Your same nightmare?" Rhett asked kindly.

"No, not that." Scarlett's cheek started to blush. "It was just a dream." she shrugged.

Rhett said, "You know my mammy used to tell me if you told a bad dream, it wouldn't come true."

"I don't know if that is so." Scarlett said.

"Do you want it to come true?" Rhett pressed her, looking her in the eye.

"I - Oh Rhett, enough. It was just a dream, a silly dream." Scarlett avoided his gaze and plucked at the book cover, her cheeks were reddening with embarrassment.

Rhett looked at her flushed face and took note of her nervous demeanor. A silly dream of her dear Ashley he wondered? He tried to push back his growing anger.

"Such a waste," he mumbled.

"What's a waste?" Scarlett asked, looking over at him.

"It is what I fear you are doing. Wasting your life on a dream that will never come true." Rhett said harshly, his tone bitter. His eyes flashed with something. Anger? Hatred?

Scarlett felt a tightness at her throat. What did he mean that she was wasting her life on a dream? Could he know her dream? Why did he always speak in riddles to her? She tried to think of a light response but her eyes burned and her voice faltered. A heavy silence of unsaid thoughts floated between them.

Rhett, remembering his plan, forced a lightness into his voice.

"Did you enjoy the book?"

Scarlett, glad to change the subject, brightened. " I did. Yet all these women were thought of as 'ladies' but they didn't act very ladylike at all."

"Tell me."

"Well, they didn't seem to follow all the silly rules that society insists upon. If they wanted something they found a way to get it and the Devil take the hindmost. They never seemed to worry what other people thought about them. And not many of them seemed to be faithful to their husbands!"

Rhett threw back his head and laughed. "Well put, Scarlett. And do they remind you of anyone?"

Scarlett, pleased at his laughter and his compliment, thought about all the ladies she knew. Though she could imagine Mrs. Merriweather brandishing a sword and Mrs. Meade poisoning someone to advance Dr. Meade, she could not think of her mother doing any of those things. And she definitely could never imagine any of them taking on lovers!

Rhett smiled at the face that Scarlett was making. "You don't have to answer right now. Think about it, though. It will come to you." He stood. "I'm going up on deck. We should be just about at port."

Scarlett stood as well, her instincts propelling her. "May I join you? I'm interested to see the city that you dragged me halfway round the world to visit." She pouted very prettily at Rhett with her eyes looking up from her spiky lashes andwas pleased to see the glint of laughter in his eyes.

Rhett wondered what Scarlett was up to, but never one to look a gift horse in the mouth, replied, "I would like nothing better. I need to get my overcoat. Shall we say in five minutes?"

The deck was crowded with other passengers as Scarlett and Rhett watched the ship pull towards San Francisco harbour. Scarlett's mink lined cape kept her warm against the cold breeze and her matching mink hat with its diamond pin set on the side, sparkled brightly in the late autumn sun. She made such a lovely picture that Rhett felt pride at his good sense of choosing her clothes. Pilot cutters darted amongst the large passenger ships like swallows in a field, whaling ships, heavily laden scows and ponderous cargo ships all jostled for room in the bay with its surrounding hills.

"How can the Captain maneuvre through all these boats, Rhett?"

"Ships, Scarlett, they're ships. Boats are..."

With a hiss of annoyance, Scarlett stopped him. "Fine, ships! You are just like Miss Simpson, the composition teacher at the Fayetteville Female Academy," Scarlett screwed up her face and spoke with a high whining tone, " '' i before e, except after c, Miss O'Hara!' She was a shriveled up prune of a woman and she always badgered me over my spelling. 'Maybe if you read more, Miss O'Hara, you would have a better appreciation for the English language.' Oh Rhett, look, two ships have crashed into the shore!"

Rhett could not stop the feeling of delight listening to Scarlett. How he loved her.

"Purposely, my darling. At the start of the Gold Rush, many ships arrived in the harbour and their crews abandoned ship to make their fortunes in the gold fields. The ships couldn't be sailed without crews and sat idly in the harbour, clogging up entry for other ships. Finally one bright captain thought to ram his ship into the foreshore and use it as a hotel as accommodation was also in short supply. More captains followed suit and there you have it, a ready made hotel row with water views."

Scarlett looked at the ramshackle ships and said "I hope our hotel is a better class than those."

Rhett grinned, "No need to worry. We're not staying in a hotel. We've been invited to stay at my friend's home."

If Rhett had been looking at Scarlett, he would have seen the look of disappointment and the anxiousness that crossed over her face.

This honeymoon was difficult enough without having to stay in some stranger's house, making nice with a hostess who would undoubtedly look down her nose at Scarlett the whole time and wonder how long they were staying and how long before they would leave. Once again, Scarlett wished she could wing her way home to where she felt comfortable. Home, she missed it, she missed her mills, she missed her store, she missed her children, she even missed Melly with her calm kindness. Damn Rhett. Why did he have to take her across God's Green Acre? It's not like they were husband and wife in the true sense. The dream flashed through her thoughts again, oh damn Rhett, what was this marriage all about?

"How lovely," Scarlett lied.

The dock was chaotic with passengers arriving and departing, greeting old friends and fond farewells to loved ones. Large Italian looking men were pushing carts filled with fish; Irishmen, looking like the beloved potatoes of their homeland, whistled as they toiled; Spanish types displayed their large muscles and luxuriant moustaches and flashed their black eyes with love or hatred in equal doses; small Orientals with long braids down their backs and wearing what looked like black pyjamas, scurried about hefting loads that seemed to be twice their body weight. Their eyes were secretive and Scarlett felt a shiver of fear looking at them. She tightened her grip on the black crocodile skin valise that held all her jewellery.

Rhett was alive with excitement. His eyes glittered as he looked around. Holding Scarlett close, he pushed their way through the crowd. The street was just as busy as the dock. Drays loaded with goods for merchants, wagons of luggage from the ships in the harbour, handcarts pushed and pulled by all types of merchants, private buggies of the well-to-do, omnibuses pulled by large horses with bridles sparkling with silver medallions, their cars filled with people. A line of hansom cabs waited along the curb for fares.

"Mistah Rhett, Mistah Rhett, here I am!"

Rhett pulled Scarlett along down the row to the fifth cab in line. A tall reddish man stood waving his battered top hat adorned with a long peacock feather drooping down. Leaping from his perch on the cab, his long oilskin coat flapped around his legs as he put out his hand. Rhett grasped it and then with a laugh, they hugged each other.

"Titus, you are a sight for sore eyes! How are things?"

"My, Mistah Rhett, I'm surprised you remember an old man like me. It's been many a year since you've been here in San Franciscy." The man's face showed his cross heritage, the high cheekbones and eagle nose of of an Indian, and the broad forehead and the sleepy eyes of a Spaniard.

"How could I ever forget you, Titus? Didn't you save my life once? I believe I still owe you for that."

"Oh, that was nothin' suh. You would have done the same for me. So, you is back in San Fran agin. Well, that is fine."

"Yes, I'm back again. And I have brought my wife. Scarlett, let me introduce you to Titus, he is the man who saved my life after a nasty encounter with a drunk miner and a sharp knife."

Scarlett bowed her head and said "How do you do, Mr. Titus. Thank you so much for saving my husband's life, I do appreciate it. But what ever happened to the drunk miner?"

The men laughed. "Least said, soonest mended, Missus." Titus replied.

" How did you come to be driving a cab, Titus? What about hitting that lucky strike you always talked about?" Rhett asked.

Titus grinned a toothy smile, the gold in his teeth flashing. "I hit more of those than I got toes in my boots but every times I got a jump on things, all the money went to good whiskey and bad women!" Titus ducked his head to Scarlett. " Pardon me, Missus Butler. So one day I woke up and thought, 'Titus, you got your choice, keep on and die alone and broke or give up now and die in your own bed with someone spilling tears over your passing.' So I took the bit I had saved and invested in this here rig and my sweet Nelly."

"Is that your wife, Mr. Titus?" Scarlett asked.

Titus hooted. "Nah ma'am, that's my horse, I'm still hoping to find me a as fine as my Nelly. But when I do, I'll grab that gal and run to the preacher man before you can say 'Jack Robinson'!"

They all laughed.

"Just don't wait to long to find her Titus. You aren't getting any younger." Rhett teased.

"Seems to me congratulations are due to you, Mistah Rhett. Funny thing but, I thought you always told me you weren't the marrying kind."

"True but sometimes drastic action is needed." Rhett smiled, "We were lucky to see you, Titus."

"Nah, not so much luck. I been waiting for ya. Mistah Masterson hired me to be your driver while you visiting. He thought you would like a friendly face and some one who knew your ol' haunts. But here I is, jawing away to you, when I bet your Missus wants to get off this street and on her way. Hop in, Missus Butler, let me take your case, mind your step there now. Up ya get, Mistah Rhett." Seeing his passengers safely aboard, Titus swung his large frame up on the back of the cab and took up the reins. "Let's go, Nelly." Titus made two kissing sounds and the large bay mare set off at a quick trot.

"And what are you old haunts, Rhett? Can I go too?" Scarlett teased.

"They are some places where no lady should dare go and so you, my dear, cannot go ."

"But I thought that you didn't consider me a lady?" Scarlett was looking up at him, still flirtatious but also somewhat puzzled.

Rhett diverted the subject quickly. "Look, over that way is Portsmouth Square. A man could go into a saloon and the next day wake up twenty miles at sea, on his way to China. Some captains were not too particular of their crew and too desperate to get them so they hired barmen and thugs to do their recruiting. Mickey Finns and blackjacks worked well." Rhett kept up a monologue of the history of San Francisco, pointing out different buildings and areas that had been part of his past. Scarlett laughed and listened, fascinated by the stories but also by the change in Rhett. He seemed to have let go of some of his secrecy and reclusiveness. He appeared as light hearted as a boy, eager to show his treasures.

Nelly pulled the cab up the steep hills, encouraged by Titus with kisses and sweet words. The

street-scape changed from ship chandlers and saloons to exclusive shops, then wood-framed houses built close together and on to detached homes. They rode higher up the hill and the houses became bigger, more regal and with large gardens behind tall walls.

Titus turned Nelly through the high wrought iron gates that opened to a circular white gravel drive that swept towards a beautiful beaux arts house. It was a warm white with a pale green copper roof, it had high arched windows and exquisite detailing along the cornices. Though it was stunningly grand, the house looked welcoming. The house seem to shimmer with a pearly iridescence.

The broad front door was open and a plump matronly looking woman stood on the marble steps. With a soft whoa, Titus stopped the cab before the portico. Leaping down, he hurried to open the gate of the cab. Rhett jumped down and turned, offering his hand to Scarlett. Grateful for the warmth of his hand, Scarlett stepped down, her boots crunching on the gravel beneath her feet. The woman on the stair smiled down at them. She had bright, blue eyes and round, pink cheeks. "Captain and Mrs. Butler, welcome to Belle Vue. My name is Mrs. Jenkins, I am the housekeeper. Please come in." Stepping in to the vestibule, Scarlett felt immediately at home. She and Rhett followed Mrs. Jenkins into the large hallway. The ceiling rose high above and an enormous skylight filled the area with light. A round mahogany table was in the center of the Persian rug that stretched across the hall. A beautiful flower arrangement stood taller than Scarlett on the table.

Rhett glanced around the hall and spied two pairs of dark eyes watching them from between the carved balusters on the upper stairs. He gave them a smile and a wink.

"Mrs. Masterson sends her regrets. She wanted to be here to welcome you herself but a small emergency called her away."

"Nothing serious, I hope." Rhett said politely.

"Something to do with the presses, I think she said. She will be home as soon as she can. Now if you will follow me, I will show you to your rooms as I am sure you would like to freshen up." Mrs. Jenkins opened a door which led into the morning room. As she crossed the room to the French doors which opened on to the garden, Mrs. Jenkins continued, "Mrs. Masterson thought, as it is your honeymoon, you may prefer a bit of privacy." She opened a door and stepped out on to the patio outside, " My, the breeze is a bit cool today." Rhett and Scarlett followed Mrs. Jenkins along the stone flag pathway. Rose bushes, some with late blooms still clinging, bordered the path. "It is a pity you didn't come in summer to see the garden at it's best. These are Mrs. Masterson's pride and joy. She is well known for her roses, yet she is so modest about her talent for growing them. She always says it is because of her gardener Kim that they do so well. There he is over in the perennial garden" She pointed over at an ancient Chinese man who was bent over weeding a bed, his conical hat hiding his face from view as he worked. They circled around a flowing fountain, a white marble figure of a half dressed woman holding a ewer from which water poured, stood in the middle of the pool of water. Scarlett gazed at the statue's face, the straight nose, soft cheeks and slender neck bowed down as if in prayer and Scarlett was suddenly reminded of her mother.

"Here we are at the guest house. Maybe we will start calling it the Honeymoon Home!" Mrs. Jenkins cheerily said.

Mrs. Jenkins guided them towards a small replica of the mansion behind. The outside walls had the same pearl like iridescence and the cornices mimicked the large house in a simpler fashion. Mrs. Jenkins opened the door and stood back, permitting Rhett and Scarlett to enter before her. They stepped into a snug sitting room. A small coal fire cozily burned in the fireplace edged with decorative tiles, a chintz love seat before it with a comfortable arm chair at the side. Mrs. Jenkins followed behind them. "Welcome again. This obviously is the sitting room, through here is the dining room." she opened a door which to a sunny room with French doors leading out to the garden. "And then through this door is your own kitchen." Pushing open the far door, a small modern kitchen was revealed. "And here is my daughter, Alice." A young blonde girl with blue eyes and apple cheeks like her mother bobbed down in a small curtsy. "She will maid for you, Mrs. Butler. Say how do you do, Alice."

"Hello, Mrs. Butler. I have made some coffee for you. If there is anything I can do, please let me know."

"Thank you, Alice."

"She doesn't sleep here, obviously. But if you should be need her, you just need to pull the tapestry in the sitting room. Mrs. Jenkins led them back to the sitting room and pointed out the bellpull by the doorway. "It's connected to the kitchen at the main house. Your bedroom, bath and dressing rooms are up the stairs." She pointed over to the spiral stairway in the far corner of the sitting room. "Would you like to see them?"

"I'm sure we can find our way, Mrs. Jenkins." Rhett said.

"Of course, Captain Butler. Oh, I forgot to mention, three wires were delivered here this morning for you, Captain. They are on the table." Rhett picked up the flimsy papers and glanced at them.

"And Mrs. Butler, there is a note from for you as well."

"Thank you, Mrs. Jenkins."

"Well, unless there is anything else you need, please excuse us. Come Alice, let us leave Captain and Mrs. Butler alone." Alice bobbed down again to Scarlett and followed her mother out the door.

"I'll come with you, Mrs. Jenkins." Rhett said.

Scarlett asked with surprise, "You're leaving, Rhett?"

"Titus told me that Jim Masterson wants to meet me for lunch. "

"And to go to some of your old haunts, no doubt." Scarlett said with a sniff. She felt hurt and bewildered that he wanted to leave the minute they had arrived.

"Maybe. Are you sad to see me go, my love?" Rhett asked with a teasing tone.

Scarlett was confused which made her angry. She hated how Rhett always seem to switch things around from how they should be. He was her husband and this was their honeymoon, they had just arrived at his friend's home and instead of standing beside her as they met their hostess, he wanted to gallivant off to some of his low saloons and foul women.

"Oh, you can go to the Devil for all I care!" Scarlett snapped at him.

Rhett cooly drawled, "I will make sure to give him your regards. Those wires are from Mr. Scott Thompson, I imagine they will entertain you more than I would. Good day, Scarlett." With a bow, Rhett followed Mrs. Jenkins and Alice.

"Oh, damn that man, damn him!" Scarlett slammed the door hard and stuck out her tongue. Stomping into the sitting room, she banged herself down on the pillowy softness of the sofa. A wave of misery crashed over her. Never in her life had she felt so lonely. "Damn him." Scarlett whispered. "Damn him." She sat watching the coals burn in the grate and forlornly wondered what tomorrow would bring.

**Is anyone humming the tune "San Francisco"? It has been my theme song for the past while.**

 

 

 

 


	13. The Cool Grey City of Love

**Chapter 13**

**The Cool Grey City of Love - George Sterling**

Scarlett stood up, throwing off the heavy melancholy that threatened to suffocate her. She was not going to sit and mourn over what was, she was a fighter and no one could keep her down. She was on solid ground now, no longer floating off in a tin boat in the middle of the Pacific. She had her own money and if she had to, she could arrange for some to be wired to her here in San Francisco and she would take a train back to Atlanta. Rhett could not stop her from leaving, he didn't own her, she wasn't his chattel! Let him go off to his low haunts and foul friends. Imagine the surprise on his face when he found her gone! She smiled thinking of his reaction. Scarlett wondered if he would come looking for her - how she would make him beg to take him back. He had promised her fun, ha, what a joke.

Scarlett slipped off her hat and her cape, stroking the soft fur as she hung it on the walnut hall stand. Rhett had been very generous to her, however - more than either of her other husbands. And to be fair, the beginning of the honeymoon had been pleasant enough but since then he had been so unreasonable. Why did he have to take her so far from home, dragging her around hell's acre without so much as a by-your-leave? He could go to Halifax if he thought he could treat like some monkey on a chain. All she needed to do was to devise a plan to return home.

The scent of the coffee that Jane had mentioned called to her and as Scarlett stepped towards the dining room, her foot knocked over her valise. Bending over and taking a small key linked to the gold watch brooch pinned to her dress, she unlocked the treasure chest. The jewels that Rhett had showered on her sparkled as if happy to be in the light again. Scarlett picked out one of the tortoiseshell combs, admiring the fine gemstones and the intricate work. What a lovely day that had been, Rhett had seemed happy with their bargain.

Yet, what was their contract? He had said something about wanting her because of how she had acted that awful day at the barbeque. She still squirmed at the memory. He had laughed at her in the library, mocking her declaration of love to Ashley. She felt another sharp pinch of mortification – how easily he had seen through her facade of being a well mannered lady.

During his ridiculous marriage proposal, he had told her that the only way he could have her was to marry her before she married someone else - but why did he want her? He obviously didn't love

her. And if he had only wanted her for her body, well he didn't even seem to want that, not since that night when she had proved she wasn't a lady. He wanted her because she wasn't a lady but spurned her for not being a lady and then wanted her to read about ladies. .Scarlett's head began to spin, trying to make sense of him.

The only thing Scarlett really knew was that life was much more pleasant when Rhett was happy but she had no idea what made him happy. Coquetry made him sneer and mock her, pretending to be hurt made him laugh and she had already learned, lying to him made him furious. Scarlett sighed with exasperation - life was so much easier when she didn't have to fuss over Rhett Butler. Oh why did she did she ever marry him? She never wanted to be married again,it never agreed with her, yet here she was once again, married to a man she didn't love. She had married first for spite, second for money and third for, for -Scarlett stamped her small foot - "Oh, damn that man, I can't even think why I married him!"

Locking up the case again, Scarlett looked around the room, in search of a good hiding place. A tall Oriental lacquered chest stood to the side of the door and she tucked the valise into the lower cupboard. As she stood, she noticed a flash of movement by the front window.

Darting to the door, Scarlett threw it open and demanded "What do you want?"

Two small children crouched down before the window. A young girl with straight black hair, the front locks tied back with a deep blue satin ribbon, jumped up, beside her stood a younger boy, obviously the girl's brother. His hair was as dark but mussed with cowlicks jutting pairs of jet black eyes stared up at Scarlett, the children's cheeks blushed pink.

The girl quickly curtsied and poked the boy so he jerkily bowed towards Scarlett. Stepping forward with her hand outstretched, the slim, straight girl clearly said "How do you do, Mrs. Butler. My name is Rose Masterson and this is my brother Rex."

"How do you do." Scarlett shook hands with the girl and nodded her head to the boy.

" Oh, you are as beautiful as I imagined!" Rose said and Rex mutely nodded in agreement, instantly endearing themselves to Scarlett. " We are ever so sorry for spying on you. We have been waiting for you to come ever since Daddy read Captain Butler's telegram. Do you really come from the other side of America? How long did it take to get here? Was the boat ride fun or did you get seasick? Where is Georgia? We looked for it on our map and it seemed like halfway round the world!" Grace bubbled over with excitement and Rex just stared up at Scarlett with his eyes shining.

"My goodness, you have a lot of questions!" Scarlett grinned. "Hmmm, I was just about to have some coffee. Won't you come in and join me?"

"Mrs. Jenkins says that drinking coffee will stunt our growth but if you have some milk, that would be ever so lovely!" Rose said cheerfully.

"Of course, how silly of me. Mrs. Jenkins is right. Do you see how small I am? It's all because I didn't listen to my mammy and drank coffee from the time I was ten. Let's go in and see if we can find some milk and maybe a few cookies. I'm almost sure they won't stunt your growth."

Scarlett led the children into the house, happy to have some company and wondering if they might help her somehow with her plan to return home.

Over coffee, milk and jam tarts, Grace peppered Scarlett with questions as Rex sat quietly staring at Scarlett as he munched through four tarts. As always, Scarlett revelled in being the centre of attention, even from those so young. She laughed at some of Rose's questions but tried to answer them.

"And Mrs. Butler, were you ever so scared during.." Rose suddenly stopped talking and even Rex broke off his staring at Scarlett.

Faintly, a voice was calling out. Rosie -Rex ...Where are you?"

"Oh-oh. We must go, Mrs. Butler." Jumping up from the table, Rosie curtsied and this time Rex bowed without being prodded. "Thank you so much for the milk and tarts. Would you mind ever so much if we left through this door?" Rose and Rex moved quickly to the French doors that led to the garden. "And if Mrs. Jenkins should happen to ask, please don't tell her we were here. She would be ever so cross. Bye-bye!" In a wink, the children were gone.

Scarlett laughed, well remembering running to hide from Mammy when she heard the bellowing call of "Miss Scarlett, get in here's now – whens is you goin' to start akin lak a lil lady. Be good, Miss Scarlett and come here now."

She cleared the table and took the dishes into the kitchen to hide the evidence of the children's visit. Scarlett paused to admire the efficiency of the room – a compact step-stove with a shining copper boiler standing beside it. To the left of the room was a tall, glass-fronted sideboard stored with heavy crystal glasses and ivory china and beside that was a simple pine meat safe, the metal grating protecting the food within. Standing before the window was an almost dainty porcelain sink with attached draining board, blue flowers embossed on the side. In the middle of the room stood a heavy wooden table, a vase of dried cornflowers in the middle and two bentwood chairs on either side.

Scarlett filled the sink with hot water, delighting in the ease. She well remembered what a chore it had been to wash dishes during the bad days at Tara. Water had to be hauled up from the well, carried it in the house and set on the stove to heat. How many times had she burnt herself lifting the heavy kettle to pour the steaming water into the deep soapstone sink? Nothing had been easy then, no chore simple.

As the soap began to froth, Scarlett started to hum as she washed the children's dishes and soon she was singing cheerfully - the kitchen clock keeping time merrily.

_I am a roving gambler, I gamble all around_

_Whenever I meet with a deck of cards I lay my money down._

_I've gambled down in Washington, I've gambled over in Spain_

_I'm goin' down to Georgia to gamble my last game._

_I had not been in Washington not many more weeks than three_

_When I fell in love with pretty little gal, she fell in love with me._

_She took me to her parlor, she cooled me with her fan_

_She whispered low in her Mother's ear, "I love that gambling man."_

A gentle knock at the door broke Scarlett away from her study of the wires sent by Mr. Scott Thompson. The mills were showing a strong profit and the store seemed to be making money hand over fist! The dining room table was scattered with fine writing paper that Scarlett had used to calculate gross and net, profit and loss. Thankfully the former was much higher than the later.

"At this rate I can buy that lot next to the lumber yard in three months! Oh, but I just know it will be gone by then... if only Rhett would lend me the money to buy it. He could it give it to me if he wasn't so pig-headed." Scarlett's anger towards Rhett returned three fold since the distraction of the children's visit and soothing of the warm water. The thought of someone else buying the property set her foot tapping. How she wished she could wing herself back to Atlanta. "Damn that man!"

"Mrs. Butler, I hope I'm not disturbing you." Mrs. Jenkins said as she entered the cottage, "Davey is here with your trunks and Alice will sort things away now, if that is agreeable to you."

With a shake of her head to rid her Scarlett remembered her manners and answered politely, "Thank you Mrs. Jenkins, that is fine."

"Is everything alright, Mrs. Butler? Do you need anything? Is the cottage agreeable to you?"

"Yes, thank you. It is very cosy." Scarlett replied.

A crooked old man, with a half chewed cigar stuck between his lips and Scarlett's large trunk hefted on his back, struggled through the small parlour and made his way up the winding stairs, wheezing loudly.

Young Alice followed behind with two leather hat boxes.

"I hope you haven't been bothered." Mrs. Jenkins continued.

"Bothered? By what, Mrs. Jenkins?" Scarlett asked, though she had a good idea what or rather to whom Mrs. Jenkins was referring.

The plump woman moved over to the fireplace, and poked at the coal. "The children of the house, Rosie and Rex Masterson. They are lovely little things but they can wear a person out. They have been beside themselves with excitement over your arrival and their governess can't seem to find them. I hope they haven't come pestering you."

"No one has pestered me, Mrs. Jenkins." Scarlett replied as Davey stumped down the stairs, mumbling under his breath as he went out to collect more luggage.

"Mrs. Jenkins, how would I go about sending a telegram?"

Davey returned with Rhett's portmanteau, a smaller trunk of Scarlett's and two more hat boxes. His cigar didn't seem to interfere with his grumbling.

"You just have to write it out and I'll see to it being sent, Mrs. Butler."

Scarlett quickly thought, 'Of course that is how it would be done and no doubt it would be read before it ever reached the telegraph office. No, that won't work. If Rhett gets wind of me leaving he would probably put me on a boat to China.'

"Shall I wait while you write your message?" Mrs. Jenkins asked.

"Thank you, yes. "Scarlett returned to the dining room table and quickly dashed off a note to Melly, letting her know where she was and in case Mrs. Jenkins should read the message, Scarlett sent her love to Wade and Ella.

"I'll have Davey take it when he is finished his work here if that is acceptable to you, Mrs. Butler. Or if it is important for it to be sent immediately, I could take it myself."

"Is the office that close?"

"Well no, not that close but it would be no trouble for me to go now, if you like."

"No, Mrs. Jenkins – It isn't anything vital. I imagine the telegraph office is somewhere near the post office?'

"Actually it is in the Post Office on Mission Street, down near the markets. Well, if there isn't anything else I can do for you, I'll leave you now. Lunch will be served in an hour, if that is convenient."

"Thank you Mrs. Jenkins."

"If you need anything, Alice can help you." Mrs. Jenkins said as Davey balanced the last of the luggage up the winding stairs.

Scarlett straightened up her papers and folded the telegrams into her small reticule. Davey stumped down the stairs, his cigar now chewed down to a quarter of it's original length.

"Thank you for your help, Davey. Here's four bits to buy yourself a drink to quench your thirst after your hard work."

Davey drew up his crooked back and with his neck cricked glared at Scarlett. "I am one of Christ's Children and I don't hold with no Devil's brew, Missy."

Surprised at the vehemence of the small man, Scarlett quickly soothed him. "Of course not, Davey. I only meant a small lager or two."

Davey grunted, "Thank ye, Miss. I don't have any truck with those spirits but a beer is fine – no worse for a man than a lemonade." With a stiff nod, he made his way out to his waggon, still grumbling and still chewing on his cigar.

With a shake of her head, Scarlett retrieved her jewelry box from the Oriental chest and made her way to the bedroom above.

The room was large and perfectly decorated. Windows, framed with soft white drapes, gave views of the garden and in the distance, the ocean, and filled the room with light. A rose coloured marble fireplace was opposite the high four poster bed with its fluffy white cover. It reminded her of the bed she had slept in when she was a young girl. Scarlett set her case on a vanity with a tri-mirror which stood in one corner, a small tufted chair before it. Her perfumes and silver backed brush and comb had already been laid out.

Alice stepped out of the enormous walk-in closet. "Mrs. Butler" she said, as she bobbed a small curtsy.

"Alice – my, you have been busy." Scarlett glanced about the closet. Already Alice had arranged many of Scarlett's gowns in order – morning, tea, afternoon, evening. Shoes had been lined along the floor in the same order, small dainty dancing slippers, high laced boots, street shoes of leather with high heels, house shoes with soft lining. Alice was in the middle of gently placing Scarlett's finer things in cedar drawers.

"Thank you, ma'am. Mrs. Butler, there is this glove box which I am not sure of. Where would you like it?" Alice held out a tufted blue satin glove box.

"Thank you Alice, I'll take it." Scarlett moved back into the bedroom and carefully placed the glove box into the front drawer of the vanity. She paused, lost in her thoughts.

"Mrs. Butler – will you be wanting to change for lunch?"

Scarlett looked into the mirror. Her green eyes were soft and somewhat sad. Straightening her back, she thought, "Looking pretty is half the battle. Something virginal to meet with the mistress of the house, I suppose, and no rouge."

"Alice, put out the cream dress with the purple accents. I will wear the black shoes with the gold buckles. I need to wash the travel dust off before I dress though."

"In here, Mrs. Butler." Alice led Scarlett into the bathing room. The porcelain fixtures gleamed and the towels were thick and fluffy. Scarlett was amazed at the luxury.. A large claw-footed bathtub with a nickel shower spout attached, a deep sink with matching taps and soft rug over top the black and white tile floor.

"Alice, what is there, behind the curtain?"

With blushing cheeks, Alice pulled back the curtain revealing a very modern convenience. Scarlett began to blush as well and then she giggled. "I'm sure that will come in handy."

Alice giggled as well. "I will give you your privacy, Ma'am." She closed the door behind her.

Scarlett ran the hot water and washed her face, her eyelashes spiking with the dampness. The towel was soft on her face.

This was how she wanted her own house to be, all the modern conveniences, the luxury that bespoke money. And if she ever got back to Atlanta, it was what she would have. The biggest, grandest house in all of Georgia and how jealous everyone would be! They would be sorry for how badly they treated her - they would beg to be invited to the fabulous parties she would hold. Her table would serve the best foods, the finest wines, her rugs would be thick and plush, her furniture comfortable. Her guests would be witty and charming and talk of things other than the War and the old days. Scarlett O'Hara would be famous for being the grandest hostess of Atlanta!

But as long as she was stuck on the opposite side of the country, she would be forced to wait.

"I must get home, I must. And by hook or by crook, I will!" she vowed.

 


	14. Oh how many torments lie in the small circle of a wedding ring

****Chapter 14** **

****Oh how many torments lie in the small circle of a wedding ring - The Double Gallant by Colley Cibber 1707** **

As Scarlett's nerves increased over meeting with Mrs. Masterson, her anger towards Rhett for leaving her alone, for bringing her here to San Francisco and even for marrying her also grew. She knew how most women felt about her. None of them liked her and she had heard their nattering gossip about her for too many years to think that Mrs. Masterson would be any different. She considered sending her regrets with an excuse of a headache but all that would do would be to put off the inevitable and she was very hungry.  
Standing before the mirror, Scarlett gave another pinch to her cheeks and hard bite to her lips, though she wished she could use her cosmetics. She knew she had to try to make a good first impression on the lady of the house and if she had to look drab and pale so be it. Scarlett turned the stone of her heavy engagement ring inward, she had no doubt most ladies thought it garish and she wondered herself if it wasn't a bit ostentatious for all it's beauty. She sighed, why women were always so critical of how she dressed and how she acted was beyond her. Why couldn't they mind their own business?  
Stepping out the door, Scarlett spied the Oriental squatting down beside the roses, methodically scraping at the dirt. He obviously heard Scarlett's tiny step on the paving stones and rose up. His black eyes stared blankly at Scarlett before he bowed low. A shiver of fear ran down Scarlett's spine and she wasn't sure if she should curtsey in return. With a quick nod, Scarlett made her way past and hurried towards the house.  
Standing by the open french door was a tall women with thick silver hair which was beautifully dressed,her face was unlined and her figure was erect in a deep blue taffeta gown edged with green. Her sparkling brown eyes reminded Scarlett of an inquisitive bird.  
"Mrs. Butler – I just knew you would be a beauty, I would have laid bets on it. Welcome, come in, come in!" Scarlett took her hand of greeting.  
"Thank you for having us, Mrs. Masterson. I hope we are not putting you to too much trouble."  
"Not at all! But then I'm not Mrs. Masterson, Grace is upstairs. My name is Athena Tremont, please call me Athena."  
"How do you do, Athena. And you must call me Scarlett. It still feels odd to be called Mrs. Butler, I'm not used to it yet."  
Athena laughed throatily. "Very well, Scarlett, please come in. Our cool weather must be chilling you to the bone. It's not like the South, is it?"  
Scarlett heard a familiar accent, the way Athena pronounced 'Scarlett' reminded her of Rhett.  
"Mrs. Trem - Athena,have you travelled the South?"  
The cheerful lady smiled, "Why hone-chile, I'm from Chawleston," she drawled heavily and laughed again.  
Scarlett wasn't sure whether to laugh or not as she followed Athena into the dining room. Another woman was just entering the room, she was blonde and no taller than Scarlett, her blue eyes were bright and she smiled warmly.  
" Grace, may I introduce you to your houseguest, - Mrs. Butler, Grace -Scarlett. Now we can dispense with formalities, can't we? They are usually so boring and I swear they cause wrinkles."  
Grace's bell-like laugh rang out. "Scarlett?" she said as she offered her small hand to Scarlett. "Welcome to my home. I hope you find it comfortable."  
"Thank-you...Grace" Scarlett stumbled. It felt unusual to be on a first name basis so quickly, one could go for years before calling someone by their first name. "I'm sure I will. It is kind of you to have me...us."  
"Her mammy taught her the social graces well, don't you think Mrs. Masterson."  
"Hush, Athena, you mustn't tease Scarlett. She doesn't know you well enough yet to know that you don't mean it."  
Athena gave a formal bow to Scarlett and said "Scarlett, please forgive me. I only tease those that I think are worthy. The rest I simply insult."  
Scarlett laughed. Suddenly she felt at home. Never had she been comfortable with those of her own sex yet these two women had immediately given warmth to her and she wanted them to like her.  
Mrs. Jenkins came in and said "Luncheon is ready, ma'am. Shall we serve now?"  
"Yes Jenkins, thank you. Scarlett come, sit. Athena?" and Grace sat down at the large cherry wood oval table.  
Placing the heavy linen napkin on her lap, Scarlett gazed around. Pale sunlight from the french doors gave light to the room, a ornate crystal chandelier and matching wall sconces were unlit. A coal fireplace, edged with deep red tiles burned opposite the sideboard, also in glowing cherry wood, heavy with silver and crystal. In pride of place was a portrait of two young children, Rex and Rosie each holding a small hound dog puppy, their black hair stood in stark contrast to their white dresses. The artists had captured the mischief in their eyes.  
Grace waited until another young maid dished out the luncheon of poached fish, aspic salad and fresh rolls and a nervous young man poured white wine into each of the ladies glasses as Mrs. Jenkins watched over.  
"Thank you Jenkins, this looks delicious. Please say thank you to Cook for me."  
"Yes,Ma'am. Is there anything else you need?"  
"No thank you. Go have your own lunch now, we'll ring if we need anything. Please ladies, start. But first, a toast to our guest," she raised her delicate wine glass, " To Scarlett, I hope you are as happy here as we are to have you. Salute.  
"Cheers, Scarlett! I hope you don't disappoint me, I am expecting great things from you."  
Scarlett was confused, what great things were expected? How did these ladies seem to know her so well after just meeting her? What had Rhett told them?  
Scarlett raised her glass along with the ladies. She sipped the chilled white wine, the dry fruitiness filled her mouth.  
"Thank you. I am very happy to be here "  
The ladies began their lunch and Scarlett tried hard to remember all the manners Mother had taught her, which fork to use, which knife, make polite conversation with your hostess.  
"I am sorry I wasn't here to greet you and Captain Butler, Scarlett. "  
"There was a problem with the ironing, Mrs. Jenkins said." Scarlett replied.  
Athena burst out into merry laughter. "Oh you are precious, Scarlett, I am so glad I invited myself to lunch so that I could meet you."  
Scarlett immediately felt foolish, as if she was being made a joke, her cheeks grew pink. "I'm sorry, I don't know what you mean."  
There was a problem with the printing presses. Did Captain Butler not tell you? I am the publisher of the San Francisco Daily Herald."

How could Scarlett tell Grace that she hadn't even known she was staying here before this morning. Damn you Rhett, why is everything always a secret with you?

"How wonderful." Scarlett lamely said.

Grace took Scarlett's hand. "You are so sweet. I hope you don't hold it against me."

"Why would I?" Scarlett asked. "I think it must be very exciting."  
"And why are you the publisher of the most esteemed newspaper of San Francisco,my clever girl?" Athena said, her eyes sparkling with laughter.  
"Oh Lord, Athena - why again are you my dearest friend?" Grace gazed kindly at the cheerful woman and then at Scarlett's quizzical face."My father started the paper. " Grace explained.  
"And?..." Athena prompted.  
"Do you really think Scarlett wants to be bored with that dull tale?"  
"Yes I would!" Scarlett said. "I mean, I'm sure it isn't dull. Please tell me."  
"Very well, but don't blame me if you become bored senseless." Grace took another sip of wine. "As I said, my Father first started the paper more than twenty-five years ago. Primarily because he had failed at striking it rich in the gold fields but more importantly to stop the yellow press of the competitors. He was unsuccessful on that score but enough people wanted to read quality news and his subscriptions grew. He was the first to get a telegraph link to the East Coast papers and he hired talented writers. He taught me every aspect of running the paper from the time I was young. He never believed in women being less intelligent than men. It many ways he was far more advanced then than many men are today. Would you care for more salad?"

"Keep going, Grace." Athena pushed.

"My mother had died when I was very young and my father spoilt me terribly. Whatever I wanted he gave to me. Sometimes I wish he would have been a bit stricter, well in hindsight I do. I met a young man at my debutante ball, Arthur Patton. He was handsome and so very charming, I was quite swept off my feet by him. If I hadn't been so young maybe I would have seen through his facade but I fell in love with him or what I thought he was. When he proposed to me it didn't take me two seconds to say yes. It was like I was living in a beautiful fairy tale.

My father wasn't happy, though Arthur was from a fine family from out East and had all the trappings of wealth and breeding, Father could see him clearly. He warned me I would never be happy with Arthur, that no woman with a mind would and that I would end up with a broken heart but I wouldn't listen. I wanted to be married to Arthur and that was that. My father gave in to me as he always had done.

Arthur and I were married after a very short engagement, the wedding was the season's event with more than one hundred guests though none of Arthur's family were able to attend. Looking back I kick myself for not seeing the warning signs sooner – Arthur seemed overly interested in the wedding presents and my dowry. He asked what jewels my mother had left me and suggested we should have a new house and possibly my father would help us find one.

We honeymooned through the capitals of Europe for three months, another present from my father. It was there that I began to learn what my husband was really like, the one that no longer bothered with tender words and compliments. He became critical of me, of my clothes, my manners, my family. He used to leave me in hotel rooms while he went out with friends, sometimes not returning for days. And when he did come back, sick from drink and smelling of another woman's perfume, he would be nasty to me, telling me I was a nag for asking where he had been and that my place was to be pretty, make him comfortable and not to bother him. I tried so hard to be the perfect wife for him, thinking that if I could somehow please him again that everything would be as it had been during our courtship.

When we were in Italy a telegram came – Father had died from a heart attack. I was beside myself with grief yet even then Arthur didn't seem to care. He did book our passage home immediately but not for my sake but rather for his. He wanted to learn what my father's will left him." Grace gave her head a small shake as if trying to rid her mind of bad memories. "What kind of hostess must you think I am, dear Scarlett." she smiled. "Have you had enough? Shall we take our coffee and dessert in the parlour? Athena?" Grace rang the small bell beside her place setting for Mrs. Jenkins.

"Only if you finish your tale, Grace. You can't leave Scarlett hanging."

Mrs. Jenkins came into the dining room. "Thank you Jenkins, luncheon was lovely. We will have our coffee in the parlour. Scarlett, I hope I can tempt you with Cook's meringues."

The ladies rose from the table and moved through the hall to the parlour. It was butter yellow with comfortable chairs and lounges upholstered with pale gold chintz which matched the long flowing drapes of the lace covered windows. Large vases graced the mantle filled with autumnal flowers framing a portrait of an elderly man with eyes the colour of Grace's and with the same gentle smile. Heavy silver frames of dotted the tables, pictures of the children, Athena, and another man.

Settling onto one of the chairs, Scarlett found it hard not to sink back into it's soft cushions and tried to sit upright.

Athena noticed her "Relax Scarlett we are all friends here." Scarlett gratefully sunk back as much as her stays would allow. " Now Grace, we have our coffee and our meringues - I swear one day I will bribe your Cook to give me the recipe, mine always turn into sodden blobs. Please darling, continue with your story."

"Haven't I bored you enough, Scarlett?" Grace said.

"Not at all! Please tell me what happened when you returned home." Scarlett was fascinated by the story of the gentle lady and amazed at her openess with a relative stranger.

"Very well. Where was I – yes, the voyage home. Never has a boat trip seem so long. Arthur spent the whole way bragging over his new position and telling me how he was going to change the paper. He was going to slash the staff's wages and hire new reporters, gutter scribes and hacks, the yellow press. He talked about how he would bribe officials and businessmen to write favourable articles. He was so full of himself it sickened me. It was then that I got my pride back. I saw what a mistake I had made by marrying him and I also knew I would never let him destroy what my father had worked so hard on building.

When we arrived back in San Francisco I scarcely had time to visit my father's grave, to say a prayer to him before Arthur was hustling me to the lawyer's office. He walked in, smoking a cigar and insisting Mr. Abbott attend to us immediately. Arthur barely let Mr. Abbott give his condolences to me before he demanded to hear the will."

Grace laughed "Oh, it is awful of me to say, but watching Arthur's face as Mr. Abbott read Father's last testament gave me such satisfaction. His smug face began to fall and his ears began to redden as he puffed harder on his cigar. You see, Father knew what was best for his paper and for me." Grace laughed again, her sweet twinkling made Athena guffaw and Scarlett giggle.

"What did your Father's will say, Grace?'" Scarlett asked.

"Well, dear girl, my father was a very wise man and he had a very wise lawyer. Between the two of them they crafted a will that was designed to prevent any son-in-law from ever having anything to do with the San Francisco Herald and left it in my complete control along with my Father's house and with the house he had bought me upon my marriage. It was to be mine absolute and never to be given over to any spouse." Grace began to laugh again and as she laughed harder Athena and Scarlett laughed. Soon tears were streaming down their faces and they revelled in how this gentle woman and her loving father were able to conquer over Arthur.

"Arthur of course first tried to argue with Mr. Abbott, he tried to point out that since we had only been recently married the will was invalid but Mr. Abbott pointed out the will had been written and signed on the day after our marriage and was valid.

Leaving Mr. Abbott's, Arthur began by insisting I, as a woman, knew nothing about business and it would be best if I left it to him to manage affairs. I then pointed out he knew nothing about newspapers yet I did so it would be best left to me." Grace's smile faded. "He hit me for the first of many times then. He tried to make me sign over control but no matter how many times he tried to force me, I always refused. He would sometimes change tack and try to act the loving husband of my dreams but I was too smart and never fell for his sweet words again. I also had a very good friend who watched over me and helped keep me strong."

"Someone with name of 'Athena' perchance?" Athena softly said as she held Grace's hand.

"Perchance yes." Grace smiled. "Athena kept a close eye over me, Scarlett. She knew that Arthur would do anything to get control over me and the paper, even to the point of having me declared insane. And Mr. Abbott made sure to inform Arthur about my will, which left everything to my dearest friend, Mrs. Athena Tremont and to St. Barnabas Home for the Destitute. In some ways I feel sorry for Arthur. The other men would question him as to what his job was, they asked him if he had my slippers warming and my dinner on the table after a hard day of work."

"But he could have found a job for himself." Scarlett blurted out. "Oh Mrs. Masterson.."

"Grace"

"I'm sorry, Grace. It's not for me to say but surely.."

"Yes, Scarlett, 'surely'." Athena said. "He could have gotten a job or a profession but he had no spine, no grit, he wanted the power and money without the work."

Grace nodded. "Yes, he was young, handsome, intelligent, but he was a weak man. I think it had always been his plan to marry wealth. It was his weakness that I grew to hate. More than his disdain for me, more than his violence. He had married me for my money and thought I would be easily handled. He was so very wrong."

"My brave girl."

"Thank you Athena."

The three ladies sat quietly, all lost in their thoughts. Finally, Scarlett couldn't stand it any longer.

"What happened to Arthur, Grace?"  
"He tried to fight me but after time he learned he would never win. He became a drunkard and then he discovered opium. He was found dead in one of the dens in Chinatown." Grace answered plainly.

"I'm sorry." And Scarlett truly was sorry. This fine lady did not deserve such a man, such a husband.

"Thank you Scarlett, that is kind of you. But enough of my old tale of woe, we want to hear about you."

"I'm not sure I have much to tell." Scarlett said.

"Just start at the beginning or start at the end and go backwards, we are dying to know all about you." Athena chimed in.

Scarlett thought for a moment, not sure what the ladies wanted to hear or what she wanted to divulge. "I grew up on a cotton plantation in Clayton County, Georgia..."

Her story was cut off with the appearance of Rosie and Rex. "Mama, Miss Allen said there was absolutely no point in trying to teach us anything today as we have our heads in the clouds and not on our books and we are ever so bored upstairs. May we join you? "

Athena started to laugh but tried to smother it when Grace gave her a look.

Grace with a sigh that implied both love and exasperation with her children said "Scarlett, may I introduce you to my children – Rosie and Rex. Children say 'How do you do' to Mrs. Butler."

Rosie curtsied and Rex bowed once again to Scarlett, looking at her with the hope she wouldn't give them away and in unison repeated "How do you do Mrs. Butler."

"How do you do, Rosie. How do you do, Rex." Scarlett bowed her head to them and slyly gave them a wink.

"They usually join us for lunch but today, instead of working with their tutor they went missing so they were sent back to the school room. Obviously without much success. I still haven't discovered where they were but I am sure I will. Rex, is there anything you want to tell me?"

Rex shot a look at Rosie, hoping for help. He looked down at his feet and over to Athena and finally to his mother. "I love you, Mamma!"

"The perfect response from any male when questioned by a woman. When in doubt just say 'I love you', Athena laughed. "On that note, I think it is time to go home and remind my husband how much he loves me. Come here children and give your Auntie a kiss."

Rex and Rosie ran to her and she bent down to them. "Now what is it I always tell you?"

The children parroted "Be good and if you can't be good, don't be caught."

"Well done! Grace, as always, thank you. And Scarlett, let me kiss you." Athena kissed Scarlett on her cheek. "It has been a delight to meet you and I can't wait to hear all your secrets."

"I have no secrets, ma'am." Scarlett said.

"Don't be ridiculous, every beautiful woman has at a bare minimum two or three secrets and I am going to winkle out yours. Good bye my darlings."

"And now children, back to you. Just where you when you you should have been working on your schooling?" Grace questioned.

Deep male voices could be heard from the hall and the door opened and a large, powerfully built man stepped in the room. He had steel gray hair that curled around his ears and a red, florid face. He was beautifully tailored in a suit that emphasized his shoulders yet minimized his stomach.

"Daddy!" the children shouted and ran to the man, once again reprieved from their mother's questions. "Daddy, daddy"

"Hello my little hellions. How are you? Let me give your mother a kiss." The man walked over to Grace and kissed her on her lips. "Hello my love. How was your day?"  
"All the better now you are home, dear one." They kissed again.

Scarlett could sense the deep love they felt and felt a tinge of envy. What would Grace think of her 'marriage' to Rhett? How could she explain it when she didn't even understand it herself? She couldn't let Grace or Athena know hers was not a real marriage. She respected the ladies too much and so wanted them to like her.

Rhett walked in the room with an air of ease with his surroundings and a friendly smile on his face. Scarlett moved quickly towards him, stretching up on her toes she kissed Rhett on the cheek and said "My I have missed you today!", dimpling her cheeks as she coquettishly looked up at his handsome face.

Rhett surprised, put his arms around her slim waist, "Did you really, my dear?" Bending his head he whispered in her ear, "I highly doubt it. No doubt you spent most of the day wishing to send me to hell or Halifax but I will play along with whatever game you are playing." Pulling her tightly towards him, Rhett kissed her deeply. Scarlett's head started to swim as his lips took control of her. She had missed him, missed his kisses, missed his warmth.

Rosie and Rex began to giggle and Rhett broke the kiss. He released his tight hold on Scarlett and courtly said "I'm sorry my dear wife, I will remember not to leave you alone for so long again."

"Or when the moon was overhead Came two lovers lately wed." Is the moon meant to be out tonight my love?" Grace's husband said.

"Stop Hank, don't tease them." Grace said with a light slap on her husband's arm.

Rhett laughed and smoothed his moustache as he kept his hand of Scarlett's waist, thankfully holding her up as her knees had weakened suddenly.

"Rhett let me introduce you to my wife, this is the love of my life, my dearest Grace."

"How do you do, Mrs. Masterson. Hank has spoken highly and non stop about you." Rhett said cordially.

""Please call me Grace and allow me to call you Rhett. We don't stand much on convention here."

Her husband moved over to Scarlett "And I shall call you Scarlett if you will permit me Mrs. Butler and you shall call me Hank. Your husband did not do you justice when he described your beauty to me." he bowed and gave Scarlett's small hand a light kiss. "These are our children, Rosie June and Rex Henry."

"How do you do?" Rhett said to the children.

"Very well, sir." they replied politely.

"Please sit down Rhett, Scarlett." Grace said.

Scarlett returned to her place on the sofa beside Grace, Hank sat on the rounded sofa's arm and Rhett took a chair opposite to Scarlett.

"What did you gentleman get up to this afternoon?" Grace asked.

Hank grinned. "We had a lot of catching up to do. How many years has it been Rhett?"

"I think it must have been at least fifteen."

"It must. How quickly it has gone by yet how many changes since the days of our misspent youth.' Hank chuckled. "We had lunch at the club and reminisced and then we stopped to pick up a few things. Children, if you go to the hall you will see some packages. Get them and bring them here for me."

"Presents!" Rex yelled as he and Rosie scampered out to the hall.

"Not again Hank! Grace explained to Scarlett "Hank spoils the children terribly and I sometimes have to speak to him quite firmly when he brings home yet another doll or toy."

Hank took Grace's hand in his large one and said "Ah let me have my fun. They are only young for such a short time. Besides you can't blame me this time – Rhett bought the gifts."

The children skipped back and delivered three packages to their father. "Rhett, you do the honours." he said.

Rhett picked up a gold foil wrapped box decorated with an eagle and the name D. Ghiradelli. "For you, Grace. I hope you have a sweet tooth."

Grace laughed "Well I do but I will share with two others that also have a fondness for chocolates."

"Miss Rosie – for you. Your father mentioned you enjoy reading stories and I wondered if you may like to write one for me." Rosie tore open the paper and pulled out a small journal bound in red leather and a small mechanical pencil.

"Oh thank you ever so much Captain Butler. It is ever so lovely of you. I will write you a story. Do you like romance or adventure stories best?"

Rhett smiled "Sometimes romance can be an adventure don't you think? I will enjoy reading anything you write."

Rex stood looking at the last parcel and bouncing on his heels with excitement. "Please sir, is this one for me?"

"Yes Rex. I hope you like it."

The box was oddly shaped and Rex started to shake it. "It would be best if you didn't bang it about too much, Rex. Open it and tell me what you think."

Rex tore off the brown wrapping paper and opened the lid of the box revealing his gift. It was a small guitar which he pulled out and stared at it slightly crestfallen.

"Say thank you Rex." admonished Grace.

"Thank you sir." he said softly.

"Don't you like it Rex?" Rhett asked gently.

"It is very nice sir it's just..."Rex looked at his parents and then at Rosie hoping for guidance.

"Speak plainly Rex. If you don't like it I will get you something else."

'Oh I do like it, it's just well I don't know how to play it."

"That is very easily remedied my boy. Here, pass it too me." Rhett took the guitar and softly strummed each string, tuning the instrument. "I can play a bit and I could teach you if you like."

"That would be wonderful, thank you sir. Could you play something for me now sir?"

"Oh yes Captain Butler that would be ever so wonderful, please play something for us." Rosie said.

"Yes Rhett. Play us a song." Scarlett said teasingly. "I never knew you could play the guitar."

Rhett looked at Scarlett, his eyes giving nothing away. "Don't you remember my dear. I threatened to play the guitar under your window every night until you accepted my proposal. Luckily I didn't have to follow through with my threat."

Scarlett's smile faded. Once again Rhett had made her feel foolish by pointing out how little she knew of him. "Yes, I remember."

Rhett turned his gaze to the children. "I do have a song for you. I hope you like it but I give you permission to plug your ears if you don't." Rex confused started to put his fingers up to his ears before Rosie yanked them back down and scowled at him.

Rhett's long fingers played over the cat gut strings and coaxed the guitar to a sweet melody as he sang in his deep baritone.

 _Black is the colour of my true love's hair._  
Her lips are like some roses fair.  
She has the sweetest face and the gentlest touch.  
I love the ground whereon she stands.

Scarlett thoughts returned to a time long past. Her father had taken her to Jonesboro for courtday,the town was crowded with people from the country, shops had set tables outside laden with goods for sale and Gerald had held her hand tightly as they walked past. He had stopped in front of old tinkerman who was singing as he sharpened an axe on his small wheel.

"What's wrong Pa?"

"Hush puss – just listen." Scarlett stood quietly looking around her at the different stalls wondering if Pa would buy her a sugar stick if she asked.

"Pa can I..."

Gerald ignored her, instead he spoke to the twisted backed man before him. "Thank ye laddie. Your song took me home for a time."

Scarlett had no idea what Pa was talking about, his home was Tara. She was then surprised to see him pull out a ten dollar note from his wallet and give it to the man. As they walked away, Scarlett saw a tear running down Gerald's red face.

"Pa, what is the matter with you?"

"Twas the tune the laddie was singing."

"Did it make you sad?"

"Well my girl it did and it also made me happy. Tis a grand song and it is a special thing that can make a man feel both happy and sad at the same time. Just grand"

"But how can you be happy and sad at the same time? That makes no sense." Scarlett asked.

"One day, if you are lucky you will know what I mean. Come on my girl, let's see what memento we can find for us to always remember this day."

Scarlett had forgotten what geegaw they had bought but she still remembered the song of the tinkerman.

 _I love my love and well she knows._  
I love the ground whereon she goes.  
And how I wish the day would come  
When she and I can be as one.

Black is the colour of my true love's hair.  
Her lips are like a rose so fair.  
She has the sweetest face and the gentlest hands.  
I love the ground whereon she stands.  
I love the ground whereon she stands.  
I love the ground whereon she stands.

They all applauded Rhett when he finished and Rosie said "Oh Captain Butler, that was ever so beautiful! It made me feel all funny inside. Did you write it for Mrs. Butler?"  
The adults laughed and Rhett replied "No Miss Rosie. It was written a long time ago - well before I met Mrs. Butler."

Scarlett gazed at Rhett as he began to teach Rex a simple chord on the guitar. She too had a funny feeling inside and she now understood what her father had told her that day by the tinkerman.

**Yikes this was a long chapter! My muse grabbed hold of me and took over while I was in the middle of writing another story, she is a tricky one. I wonder if anyone is beginning to work out Rhett's Master Plan? Thank you all for being so very patient with me and TTAC.**

 

 


	15. Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it’s only by this meeting that a new world is born.

**Chapter 15**

 

**Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it’s only by this meeting that a new world is born. Anais Nin**

 

 

Scarlett was happy. For the first time in a very long time, she was happy. She woke in the morning and looked forward to the coming day and at night she slept peacefully. Of course, not everything was perfect but for the most part she was happy. Her thoughts of running away had receded for the time being.

Belle Vue had become almost a home for her. Hank and Grace were gracious hosts and Athena never failed to make Scarlett laugh during her frequent visits. The children were delightful and she enjoyed their company when they would visit her in the cottage. Rose was a bright, cheerful girl who was always brimming with questions and young Rex, though still bashful, seemed to revere Scarlett. Even Rhett seemed in better spirits. He complimented her more often, though usually only when they were with the others. When they were alone, he still kept his distance from her. He was polite and mannerly but not as he had been when they were in New Orleans. He made no advances towards her, he never touched her except when they were in company of others - then he would play the part of the newlywed husband, it was if they were both acting the roles of young lovers. Scarlett was thankful for this at least.

They were friendly with one another when alone, much like the time when Scarlett was married to Frank. Scarlett would pour over the wires from Mr. Scott Thompson and she and Rhett would discuss business. When Scarlett complained about Ashley's poor handling of the mill, Rhett surprised her by sympathizing with him.

“You shouldn't be so hard on him, Scarlett. You must remember he wasn't raised to run a lumber mill.”  
“And I was? He had more schooling than I ever did!”

“But he was schooled in being a gentleman, my dear. He was taught to read fine poetry, admire great works of art and ponder philosophic ideas. You, on the other hand, were taught to manage a household, balance a budget, tend to one hundred darkies and of course to keep your husband happy at all times.”

“Well you were brought up the same as him and you seemed to manage fine.”

“True but I am not a gentleman like Ashley Wilkes, as you are always so quick to remind me. He is lucky though, having you and Miss Melly to help him, he will always have you to support him through life, won't he? I never was that blessed. ”

“But you had tenacity and a backbone, Rhett, that's how you survived.”

Rhett looked surprised. “Thank you Scarlett, I think that is one the first compliments I have ever received from you.”

“Well don't look so surprised. It's not like I hate you, why I married you didn't I?”

“And that must mean you love me like all your other husbands.”

Scarlett scowled. “Don't be ridiculous, Rhett.

 

 

Rhett wasn't like Ashley at all and she briefly wondered which she preferred for a husband; a poor gentleman or a rich scoundrel.

She noticed how Rhett's eyes would spark when she would come up with a new idea and it delighted her to know that he at least appreciated her business sense.

Often Scarlett would glance up at Rhett and catch him watching her with a gleam in his eye. It was if he was waiting for something, wanting something but whenever she would ask him why he was staring at her he would say “I'm sorry, my mind was on something else. What did you say?” and he would then so skillfully change the subject that Scarlett wouldn't realize until later that he had avoided the question yet again.

Scarlett didn't know how long Rhett was planning for them to stay in San Francisco or if they were to travel somewhere else but as she was content here at Belle Vue, she kept silent. Though she desperately wanted to return back to Atlanta and the mills, for the time being she was happy.

Her days passed quickly, Alice would usually wake her at 8:30 with coffee, Scarlett would bathe, luxuriating in the hot water of the deep claw footed tub and the large cakes of perfumed soap. Alice would then arrange her hair, often suggesting new styles that she had seen in the society pages of the newspaper and help her dress.

Rhett was always up well before Scarlett, sometimes he would return back from his early morning ride to join her for breakfast, served by Alice in the small dining room of the guest house.

Grace spent her mornings at the newspaper office and the children had their schooling. Hank also was gone for the day at his mining office and Rhett had joined the yacht club and spent his afternoons sailing the waters of San Francisco on a boat owned by another old friend, Ian Griffith.

Scarlett was often alone until midday when she would join Grace and the children for lunch.

 

Frequently, Athena would also be there and they would happily spend the afternoons together. Rhett and Scarlett dined with Hank and Grace every night and again Athena often was there joined by her husband Stephen – he was a small man, barely reaching Rhett's shoulder. His blue eyes sparkled and he had a balding pate. Athena teased him about it by saying “Your face is so handsome it wanted to take over your whole head.”

Stephen and Athena were obviously an old married couple but acted like they were still courting. They always were close to one another, holding hands and finishing each others stories. Scarlett had never met a couple such as them.

Because Scarlett was so often left to her own devices, she fought off her boredom by reading the newspaper that Alice brought in every day. It had originally started with Scarlett scanning the advertisements of millinery and dress shops, announcing shipments of fashions delivered directly from France or England but her eye moved to the reports of court proceedings and she became fascinated by the Finnegan case.

 

Sean Finnegan had been charged with the willful murder of Albert Thurlow and once he was found guilty, as he most obviously was, would be hung. Finnegan, a stevedore, had been the suitor of Thurlow's eldest child, Nancy. He had fallen deeply in love with her and proposed marriage which she had accepted. Her father, though, who had always been on friendly terms with Finnegan, had refused to give his blessing to the union and barred Nancy from ever seeing Finnegan again. Finnegan, distrait with love, had loitered outside the The Silver Tavern where Mr. Thurlow worked as a barkeep, waiting for the man to finish his work. On the street, before six witnesses, he had stabbed the loving father in cold blood.

Scarlett was bubbling over with the case when she joined Grace and Athena for lunch. Of course, she had to wait until after the children had been excused from the table before she could speak of what she had read.

The minute that Rosie and Rex left the room, Scarlett began. “I have been reading about Sean Finnegan. That poor girl – to have her father killed by the man she loved.”

Athena snorted. “Poor girl, my foot.”

Scarlett was confused, “But the paper said that she loved Finnegan and her father refused to allow her to marry him and that she would be put into a convent if she tried.”

“It's the first time I ever heard that Baptists have convents.” Athena replied. “Grace, maybe you should inform our innocent here with the true facts of the case.”

Scarlett scowled, she hated to be made fun of or to be made to feel foolish, both of which Athena had just done.

“Oh smooth your feathers, Scarlett darling.” Athena said, as she patted Scarlett's hand. “You aren't saying anything different than most of San Francisco and I fear the jury too.”

“Sweet Scarlett – sadly Athena is telling the truth. Nancy Thurlow is not as she seems.” Grace said. “The real facts of the case haven't been given to the court and probably won't be – Sean Finnegan loved and still loves Nancy Thurlow, poor man.”

Grace poured more coffee into her cup and slowly stirred in the cream. The fine china cup tinged with the silver spoon.

“Sean and Nancy began courting when she was only fifteen and he was twenty-three. He bought her little furbelows , ribbons for her hair, lace hankerchiefs, candy, things of that sort. He squired her around the neighbourhood when he was home from sea. On her seventeenth birthday, Sean proposed to her and gave her a small diamond ring. He had started saving the money for it from the first day he had met Nancy, as he was always determined she would be his wife.”

“Yes, I've read all this in the paper.” said Scarlett.

“The whole story hasn't been printed in the papers.” Grace said. “Nancy has great dreams for her future, she wants more than what her mother had - she died when Nancy was ten, she was a woman who had worked herself to death taking care of her husband and her children. Nancy was the eldest and so it was left to her to take care of the family, to cook and clean and raise her younger sisters and brothers. She has always sworn she would live the good life, a better life than that of her mother's.

 

Nancy got work as a maid in one of those vainglourious houses on Russian Hill and the owner's son took a shine to her - his presents were much more expensive than hair ribbons. She thought she had caught herself a live one, the silly girl. He had no interest in her except as a bit of fun but he led her on with talk of a life together. Nancy was so sure of his intentions, none of which, as it turns out,were good, that she made up the story that her father had refused to allow her to marry Sean and would send her to a convent if she saw him again.”

“But why?”

“I think part of her knew that what she was doing was wrong.” Grace answered.

“Ha, not at all, she wanted to keep the diamond ring. No doubt she told Sean it would be something she would always treasure and would think of him every time she looked at it.” Athena said.

“Did the rich boy, did he, did she ...” Scarlett blushed.

Athena laughed, “Ha Scarlett, you are too precious for words. One would think that you are still a young unmarried girl. You want to know if they did the dirty? Who knows, probably but she isn't pregnant at least. Nancy was sacked from her job and the father packed his son and his wife off for a long European tour when news of the murder hit the papers.”

“But if the court heard about Nancy and her lies, wouldn't that change things?”

Grace sighed, “Sadly, no. Sean did kill Albert Thurlow and no matter what his reason, he will hang.”

“It seems so unfair. What about Nancy, what will happen to her?”

Athena sneered. “She is playing the part of a bereaved daughter and fiancee. She is making the most of her moment in the spotlight and is being payed handsomely by some of the other newspapers for her story. I heard she has been offered a speaking tour once the trial is finished. I would describe her as a nasty piece of goods myself.”

“No, I wouldn't go that far, Athena. She is a girl looking for a life with more comfort than what a stevedore could give her. She knows her beauty won't last long so she has to strike while the iron is still hot. I pity her and all the young women like her. This is a man's world and women have to use whatever God has given them to survive. You and I both have been very blessed in our lives, we have always had fine clothes to wear, grand homes to live in and food on our tables. Not all women are so lucky.”

“She instigated the death of her own father, caused a man that loved her to commit murder and no doubt will cause him to swing – all for money. Back me up, Scarlett.”

Scarlett gulped, she hadn't expected the conversation to go this way - 'all for money'. Hadn't she married Rhett for money, hadn't Frank died because of her ruthless pursuit of money, hadn't her own father died because of Suellen's want for money.

“ I don't know, it is hard to say what...” Scarlett said.

Grace and Athena began to debate Nancy Thurlow and Sean Finnegan but Scarlett barely heard them until Athena said 'Money doesn't guarantee happiness.”

Then as though something forced her, Scarlett blurted out, “But not having money guarantees unhappiness. I know what is like to be without money, to be hungry, to see my family starving and sick. I was willing to do anything to save them, to get the money to save Tara and my kin - anything, even murder.” Scarlett's hands began to tremble as she continued. “All I could think about was money and making money. I would lie awake at night trying to think how I could stretch the few pennies I had to buy something to make more money. Sometimes, I use to think there would never be enough money to keep me safe.”

“Safe from hunger?” Grace said.

“Safe from the wolf at the door.” Scarlett said. “You don't know what it is like to be without money and the security of it. It is the most terrifying feeling in the world, knowing that no matter how hard you work and save, at any moment someone can come and take it all away. I used to hide money under my mattress, under the floor boards, in the toe of old slippers – anywhere that I thought no one would find it. And it was never enough.”

The ladies were quiet. “Now I've done it,” Scarlett thought. “What will they think of me? Why did I not just agree with Athena, what made me talk like that.” She wanted to kick herself or run from the room so she wouldn't have to see their looks of disgust. Just when she thought she had finally made true friends with other women, she had to make a mess of it all.

Grace spoke first, “No Scarlett, we don't know what it was like for you. We were sheltered here in the west from the war. I can only imagine the hell you must have gone through.”

Athena rubbed Scarlett's shaking hands. “But you did get through it, Scarlett. And look you now – you were able to keep the wolf from the door and you prospered, you should be proud of what you accomplished. Your work saved your family and your Tara.”

To Scarlett's horror, she felt tears running down her cheeks and a thick lump in her throat. These women, these kind women were not disgusted by her but praising her.

“Oh hush now sugar.” Athena said. “Don't cry, you don't need to ever be frightened by that wolf again, your Rhett will keep you safe, hush, hush.” She dabbed her lace edged handkerchief on Scarlett's cheeks.

“So I guess you must think of me as a nasty piece of goods too.” Scarlett said, her green eyes glittering with tears.

“Don't be ridiculous!”

“Not in the slightest.”

“But I did everything I could to make money.”

“But you, our darling Scarlett, did it for your family and your home.” Athena said. “You thought of others while Nancy Thurlow was thinking only of herself. You sent your little scraps of money to every one of your relatives, didn't you, even though you had barely enough yourself?”

Scarlett gulped and slowly nodded. “Yes, how did you know?”

“Because I know women of character. You made sure your son had food in his stomach, even if it meant going hungry yourself, true?”

Scarlett nodded again.

“And no doubt you fed even those that weren't your kin.”

Scarlett wavered between embarrassment and pride when she nodded again.

“And I have no doubt you used your arsenal of feminine weapons, your dimples and your beautiful green eyes to beat the men at their own game. 'Oh kind sir, I don't know if I am smart enough to add up these numbers but I do believe you owe me...' Am I right?”

Scarlett began to laugh, “Why Athena, how did you know?” she said in her best southern belle simper.

“Oh honey chile, because I would have done the same if I had been in your position.” Athena said in kind.

Grace patted Scarlett on her knee. “The difference between you and Nancy is you did everything for your family and Nancy did everything for herself. She wasn't starving, her father made a decent wage to support his family. She could have told Sean the truth, that she didn't love him.”

“But she would have had to give back the diamond ring if she had. You know, she sent her brothers and sisters to a cousin in Iowa within a week of her father's death because she didn't wanted to be saddled with them. Would you have done that, Scarlett? I doubt it.”

“Well, maybe just one of my sisters.” Scarlett said.

“Oh well, I have one of those too – Rhea is her name. We have hated each other since we were in short skirts, I wish I had drowned her when she was first born. Thank your stars you are an only child Grace, little sisters cause nothing but trouble to first born daughters.” They laughed.

“Scarlett, if I had ever had a daughter, I would have wanted her to be like you. I would have wished her to have your intelligence, your beauty but most of all your strength.”

Grace said, “I have a daughter and I heartily agree with Athena – I hope my Rose grows up to be a lady such as you, Scarlett. You have grit, as my father used to say and every woman needs grit to survive.”

Scarlett was stunned, she had rarely been complimented by women, only Melly and Grandma Fontaine had ever come close to it.

She looked at these women and realized they were true friends, they accepted her for what she truly was and still liked her.

No one, other than Rhett, had ever truly liked her, the real her.

 

 

 

Rhett first began to feel the difference in Scarlett – her happiness with San Francisco and with Belle Vue - but he also saw it.

Her eyes sparkled and she smiled easily. She spoke freely in the company of Grace and Athena and seemed relaxed. She had begun to return to the young girl that he had first seen at Twelve Oaks, like a cat with a bowl of cream, satisfied with life and conceited in her position. She no longer had the look of desperation in her eyes or the tightness in her stance. He could sense the relaxation of her mind and her body.

He still planned on belling this green eyed cat and he felt he was nearing his objective, though he wasn't there quite yet.

Grace and Athena obviously enjoyed Scarlett's company as well, for which he was thankful. They were kind ladies and he hoped some of their sophistication would rub off on Scarlett.

Sitting in the small armchair in their bedroom, Rhett watched Scarlett preen herself at the vanity. He enjoyed watching her as she finished her toilette before dinner, it was something he had remembered about his own mother. She , like Scarlett, had been slow yet precise with her evening adornment, the small touches of perfume on her inner wrists, the smoothing of her eyebrows, the biting of her lips and the small pinches to bring a pink to her cheeks. Scarlett would have previously added rouge and lip stain but again, Grace and Athena's impact had unconsciously influenced her towards simplicity which gave her more elegance and grace.

Tonight, Alice had styled Scarlett's black hair ornately and Scarlett was debating which earbobs of the many jewels he had bought for her were most becoming to her dusty rose watered silk gown.

“I suggest the pearls.” he said.

“Not the rubies, Rhett? But they are so pretty.” Scarlett said as she held the heavy gold and jewelled earring against her ear.

“They are too garish with that gown, you need something more simple and considering how Alice has dressed your hair, you shouldn't wear earrings. Your pearls would be best, they will bring out the pink of your skin.”

Rhett stood behind Scarlett and taking the wide pearl collar from it's velvet case he said “Let me help you with the clasp.”

As he latched the necklace around her long neck, his fingers lightly stroked her skin. His touch made Scarlett shiver and she lightly leaned back against him.

Rhett gazed at her in the mirror but her eyes were focused on herself as she smiled at her vision.

She always thought of herself or her Ashley, no one else.

 

Rhett wandered the room, noticing how Scarlett had made her mark on it. It was scented with the perfume she had bought last week - a heavy spiced floral mix that suited her - a few of her ornate fans were displayed on the mantle and an etching of Tara that Melanie had drawn was on the bedside table.

There was also a slim burgundy book. He had noticed Scarlett was beginning to read more now, again no doubt due to Grace and Athena.

Rhett picked up the paper backed volume, flipping through the pages, he said, “Are you reading this?”

Scarlett glanced over at him.

“Yes, it is a book of short stories that Grace thought I may like.” Scarlett said, as she gave a final pinch to her cheeks. “It was written by one of the writers at her newspaper who came from Missouri. The Jumping Frog story made me laugh and so did 'Advice to Little Girls'.

 

Rhett cocked his eyebrow. “And what advice does he give to little girls?”

 

Scarlett took the book from Rhett and flipped through the pages, “Here is one very fitting for me - 'Good little girls always show marked deference for the aged. You ought never to ‘sass’ old people unless they ‘sass’ you first.' So I will be a good little girl and show 'marked deference' to you, Rhett Butler,” Scarlett smiled, “until you sass me, which should be in about five minutes.”

“Are you calling me aged, Scarlett?”

“Why no, whatever gave you that idea?” Scarlett laughed. “Oh dear Rhett, where is your cane? Are your teeth still in the glass?”

“I thought you weren't meant to sass your elders.”

“You have been sassing me since the day we met so I think I am allowed.”

“You show me no respect, Scarlett.” Rhett said joining in her laughter. “Why did I marry you again?”

Scarlett stopped laughing and looked Rhett in the eye. “I don't know, I have often wondered.”

She saw a flicker of wariness come over Rhett's face before he smiled, “I've told you before, I wanted you as my pet and a trip down the aisle was the only way.”

“Maybe you should have gotten yourself a dog.” Scarlett said.

“I much prefer cats. Haven't you noticed?”

“No Rhett, I haven't.” Scarlett green eyes focused on his, trying to read the truth. “It seems like I know you less now that we are married than when you used to squire me around Atlanta during the war.”

Rhett smiled, “Why Scarlett, you are beginning to talk like an old married woman, remembering the joys of yesteryear.”

“Ssss” Scarlett hissed in frustration. “Can't you ever talk plain, Rhett? Everything is always a riddle or a joke to you.”

“That is part of the joy of being married to me, my dear. Remember how I promised you fun?” Rhett stood up and moved closer to Scarlett. “Interesting you have been wondering about me, does that mean I am often in your thoughts, my dearest wife?”

“Pff, only when I have trouble falling off to sleep – then the thought of you bores me so, I am instantly asleep.” Scarlett snapped.

“Alas, alack, another hope dashed. Ah well my pet, I am glad the thought of me brings you pleasant dreams.”

“More like nightmares.” Scarlett snipped, trying to break through his wall of indifference.

“Well at least I am in your thoughts. I can die happy now.” Rhett said. “Would you care to join me in a walk around the garden before dinner?”

“No thank you, I'd rather not.” Scarlett said stiffly, expecting Rhett to ask her again, entreat her to join him so she could pretend to throw him a bone by accepting.

“As you wish.” Rhett bowed to Scarlett and walked down the stairs and out the door, leaving Scarlett behind to stamp her foot and scowl.

“Oh, that man! Why did he marry me if he hated me so much? And I'm not old.” Scarlett moved towards the vanity and looked at her image in the mirror with a critical eye. Her cheeks were round again and thankfully there was no lines beside her eyes. Her throat wasn't turkey necked and her mouth was still full - lush for kisses as one her beau's had once told her.

“Well they may be lush but they aren't getting any kisses. Not that I want to be kissed by that skunk, Rhett Butler. Why I think I would rather die than have to be kissed by him again.” Scarlett tried to convince herself that being kissed by her husband would be a fate worse than death and she tried to recreate the thought of Ashley's kisses. Her mind instead clouded with memories of Rhett's lips – the skill and prowess he had, the tickle of his moustache and the way his lips would be soft one minute and hard the next, how he managed to make her feel hot and cold – shivering and perspiring at the same time. His long slow kisses seemed to last a lifetime but were never long enough,.

“Damn you, Rhett Butler – you spoil everything, even my memories.”

 

Scarlett would have been much happier if she could have read Rhett's thoughts as he walked around the garden paths.

How easily she could catch him out. He always had to be on his toes with Scarlett, she was sometimes very intuitive and without being constantly on his guard, she would soon winkle out his true reason for marrying her. He loved her, he loved everything about his maddening wife but until she realized how she was meant for him, he had to watch his every word and every action.

For Rhett was sure that if Scarlett would only open up her eyes and see what she held in her pretty hands, she would love him and not that fool Wilkes.

Rhett picked up a long twig that had fallen from an oak tree and whipped it as he strode past the garden wall.

It had galled him to stand up for Ashley but obviously criticizing him to Scarlett made her leap to his defence where as pitying him made her begin to scorn him.

She must know that Ashley was a milk toast sap who was lost in daydreams of the past. The man should have died during the War, it would have been a kindness for him. A quick death with honour compared to a slow death of lost dreams. Ashley would never be happy in this present world. The old South was gone and those that couldn't move forward with the times would be doomed to a life of unhappiness. Scarlett was the New South and she needed a partner to lead her in the dance of the changing tempo to be happy.

At night, well after Scarlett had gone to bed and after he had drunk his final brandy, Rhett would silently walk up the spiral staircase to the bedroom. He would stand gazing down at her, her black hair tied neatly in a long braid, her face relaxed, her mouth soft. If he was an artist, he would paint her this way – the thick lashes curving against her cheekbones, her eyebrows, like black wings, standing starkly out against her white skin, her red lips that he ached to kiss.

She would sometimes faintly whisper in her dreams, words that made no sense or were spoken too softly for him to hear.

His gut would tighten, knowing that she was speaking of her love to Ashley, begging for his kisses and his arms. Those nights, Rhett would return to his brandy and wait for dawn so that he could ride his horse until he could exorcise the frustration that tore him apart.

He didn't know how long his patience would hold before he would break. He sometimes feared he would kill Scarlett. He imagined putting his hands around her beautiful white neck and squeezing the breath out of her, he would feel her pulse frantically beating and in her last moments he would tell her how much he loved her and he would see in her eyes the final understanding that she loved him.

Rhett threw the stick hearing it crack against the stone wall.

His plan had to work otherwise there would be more blood on his hands.

 

Grace had picked a perfect day for their excursion, the breeze was light and it looked as if the weather would stay fine. The children, dressed neatly in dark blue jackets and matching wide brimmed hats, were dancing with excitement and kept telling Scarlett all the wonders she would see at the Woodward Gardens.

“There are animals everywhere! They walk around in the open, you can see kangaroos, did you know they carry their babies in a pocket? And there are camels, they smell ever so nasty, and bears even! There is a rooster who's tail is ever so long, I think it must be at least a mile.” Rosie told Scarlett.

“And, and, and there is a cow with two heads and a dog with five legs!” Rex shouted.

“Oh now I know you are teasing me, you two. There is no such thing as an animal with a pocket unless it wears trousers and a cow with two heads. Why I don't believe it.” Scarlett laughed.

“It's true, you wait, we'll show you.”

They were gathered at the marble porte cochere and the large open carriage pulled by four matching bays that had been hired for the day, pulled up on the white gravel drive. Titus was at the reins, his gold teeth glittering in the sun and there was Nelly in head position of the horses.

“Fine day Mistah Masterson, Miissus Masterson! Hullo Mistah Rhett, Missus Butler. Now who be these yung lady and yung gentman, they cain't be Miz Rosie and Master Rex, why my goodness they have grown so big!”

The children giggled, “You saw us just last week, Titus!”

“Wall, I expect you'se grown five inches since then, why I'd hardly knows ya. All aboard for a ride to de grandest gardens in all de world.”

Hank handed Grace into the carriage and just as Rhett stepped up to do the same for Scarlett, Rex pushed forward and offered his hand.

“My lady” he stuttered, his cheeks blushing.

“Why thank you, my lord.” Scarlett smiled at him, taking his small hand and stepped into the carriage.

Rex started to follow but his father held him back. “Ladies first, Rex. Let you sister in next.”

Rhett bowed to Rosie and handed her in to the carriage. The men then sat themselves facing the ladies and Titus said “All in, wall here's we go – Nelly, walk on sweet girl.” And off they went, Titus singing in a rich baritone “Sweet Betsy of Pike” to his Nelly with the carriage occupants loudly joining in the chorus.

“Sing too-rali, oo-rali, oo-rali ay!”

 

Titus guided the carriage and stopped before the grand entrance of the gardens.

“Welcome to de “Eden of de West” ladies and gentman.” Rex scrambled down and stood waiting, his father and Rhett stepped down after him, ready to hand out their ladies.

Out jumped Rosie first, needing no man to help her. Scarlett stood and Rex was there at the ready with his hand held up to guide her down the carriage step.

“My, you are a gentleman, Rex.” Scarlett said. “I think you could give my husband a few pointers.”

Hank was there for Grace who smiled and gave a nod towards their son. Hank grinned back with a wink.

Athena and Stephen, who had just arrived behind them, joined them and they all made their way to the entrance.

Hank insisted it was his treat and paid the dollar seventy entrance fee and they made their way through the turning gates to the gardens.

  
“Where should we go first, children?”  
“The zoo and then the sailing pond!”

“So be it. Lead the way.”

The party made their way through a tunnel that crossed under the street to the zoo and saw the many animals from the farthest countries of the world. Scarlett was amazed to see kangaroos , with their babies in pockets, hopping out in the open. Ostriches, standing taller than Rhett, moved about freely, making noises like rumbling drums and Stephen suggested that Athena may like to pluck a few feathers for her hat.

“Thank you, no. You could try though, love.” Athena teased.

Pink flamingos, their legs so delicate and their feathers so bright, gathered together in a shallow pool, stretching out their necks, looking for small fish.

They saw black and white striped zebras galloping in their enclosure, an eagle airie that seemed ready to fall from it's weight, they strolled passed the seal pool and laughed at the clowns of the ocean, barking for more fish from their keepers.

 

In large dens were lions, lying sleepily - when the one of the maned males roared out, Scarlett jumped and then laughed.

“Why he sounds just like my Pa when his dinner wasn't ready.”

A enormous grizzly bear named Monarch was made to dance for the spectators gathered around it's small enclosure. Deer roamed around, tame enough to be fed by the children. They saw the rooster with his twenty-five foot long tail and alligators sunning themselves of the side of a great pond.

The children, along with Hank and Stephen, went on short rides on the backs of the humped camels, making the ladies laugh at their antics of pretending to be cowboys. The camels did not seem pleased.

Scarlett's eyes were round with the wonders of it all.

They decided to bypass the reptile house out of consideration of Grace's aversion to snakes. But they stopped to watch the Delhi fire eaters, marvelling at how they seemed to eat fire and spit it out again to the loud applause of the crowd .

The party then made their way to the sailing enclosure and watched as the children sat with Rhett in the fully rigged ship that slowly moved around the large pool. Rhett pointed out the different knots used in the rigging and told them tall tales of his grandfather, the pirate.

They had a fine lunch in the restaurant with many courses of delicious food. Even Scarlett was sated by the end.

“Why Rhett, I believe this is the first time I have seen you drink water without whiskey in it!” Scarlett teased.

“I am pretending it is the finest Kentucky bourbon.” he said. “Don't spoil it for me.”

Hank explained the story of the Woodward Gardens. “Woodward owns the What Cheer House – did you ever stay there, Rhett?”

Rhett shook his head. “I heard about it thou gh – it has never allowed alcohol, has it.”  
“Right, but Woodward is such a good inn keeper, none of the men seemed to mind. The Inn is clean and honest which saying alot for this town. Many of his guests were sailors and they would come back from their travels with exotic gifts for him, art, curios such as shrunken heads, even animals. Woodward has made a great deal of money and after a time, he built this house and travelled himself to foreign lands, collecting more art and things. People begged for invitations to his house so that they could see his collection. He finally decide to open his house to the public and he has steadily added more things. You saw the gold nugget in the museum, ninety-seven pounds, can you imagine how much that cost him? His newest plan is for an aquarium and work has already begun on it.”

“It certainly is impressive.” Rhett agreed.

 

The children, having been very good over the lunch were beginning to get bored with sitting still while the adults talked.

“Papa, may we go now? I want to ride in the hot air balloon. Please Papa?”

“Well, my girl, I think your mother may like a walk through the art gallery first.”

Rosie and Rex gave a sigh, knowing how long that would take and silently Scarlett joined in their disappointment, she hated looking at 'great art', it bored her to tears. Ashley would go on and on about some picture he had seen on his European tour and would explain in great detail about swirling themes and flowing originality, words that meant nothing to her. When he would talk about Flemish artists, it would make Scarlett stifle giggles as it sounded somewhat rude.

It's not that Scarlett didn't like pictures but she liked those with flowers or dogs or horses leaping over fences.

Melly loved art as well. She and Ashley would seem to forget Scarlett was even there when they would go through those silly books they wasted their money on - large books with coloured plates of what looked like Hell painted by some artist named Bosch. Scarlett had thought if such a picture had been hanging in her house, she would have had nightmares every night.

But Melly and Ashley seem to lose themselves in a world of their own when they talked about such things.

Scarlett jerked upright, Melly and Ashley – they shared something that she could never understand. They seemed to feed off each other when they talked about such things as art and books.

“Miss Scarlett, would you like to ride in a balloon?” Rex bashfully asked.

“Miss Scarlett?”

“Scarlett, Rex asked you a question.” Rhett touched Scarlett's arm as he looked closely at her face, she seemed to be in another world. Scarlett looked up at Rhett, confused. “Rex wants to know if you would like to join us in the hot air balloon or would you prefer to go to the art gallery with Grace and Athena?”

“I'm sorry Rex, heights frighten me.” She blatantly lied.

“You could hold my hand if your scared.” Rex said.

“That's very sweet of you but I think I need to keep my feet on the ground. Will you forgive me if I pass?”

“I could forgive you anything, Miss Scarlett.” Rex said,looking at Scarlett with puppy dog love.

“Well, forgive her then and let's get going.” Rosie said. “ Hurry up Papa, there will be an ever so long line up, the balloon is only flown on Sundays. Are you coming Uncle Rhett, Uncle Stephen?”

Rosie hustled the men along and they left.

“Shall we ladies? Let's see if there is anything new at the gallery.” Grace said as she stood up from the table and they gathered their shawls about them.

Scarlett lagged behind Grace and Athena as they walked through the small gallery, lost in her thoughts. “You would hate the books I read and the music I loved, because they took me away from you even for a moment.”*

She would have, she would have hated every minute, for Scarlett to her credit knew she had to have a husband that would cherish her and love her. Even Charles and Frank had cherished her, though she gave them scant cause, she had always been sure of their love. Yet Ashley, how long would it have taken before he lost interest in her, preferring a book to her smiles, a painting to her face? Scarlett felt as if a film had fallen from her eyes, she had a clear vision of Ashley, the Ashley of now and not of her dreams.

The letters he had written to Melly during the war hadn't been love letters but some kind of discussion, would she have liked that? Why, even the letters that Charles had written had been filled with poetry and adoration, though she had disregarded them, barely even bothering to finish reading them before she tossed them away. She had thought when she had read Ashley's letters it meant he didn't love Melly, but then when he had come home for Christmas during the war, he had been so gentle towards Melly, so caring of her – he had even asked Scarlett to take care of her if he should die.

When he had returned from his European tour and she had seen that spark of want in his eye, he seeing her as a woman, not as a young girl any more, she had seen a dashing, handsome young man and she wanted him and expected him to want her.

Now the only time she saw any spark in Ashley, no matter what dress she wore or how she showed her dimples, the only time was when he was near Melly.

He had aged and sunk somehow. He seemed lost in times past, before the war, when everything was beautiful and easy. It was if he wasn't really living but letting life take him along.

Scarlett imagined what her life would have been like if she had convinced him to elope with her. Even that, for her to get him to elope or runaway, not for him to swoop her into his arms and insist that they marry, knowing that she loved him.

“It was his weakness that I began to hate.” Grace had said that about her first husband. Scarlett imagined she would have the felt the same way about her Ashley if she had married him.

Her Ashley... he had never been hers, he had always been Melly's. He would always love Melly. Three times Scarlett had thrown herself at Ashley and each time Ashley rebuffed her. He had wanted her but he didn't love her, not like he loved Melly.

 
    
    
     _"If he loved you, then why in hell did he permit you to come to Atlanta to get the tax money?_
    _Before I'd let a woman I loved do that, I'd--"_
    
    _"He didn't know!  He had no idea that I--"_
    
    _"Doesn't it occur to you that he should have known?"  There was_
    _barely suppressed savagery in his voice.  "Loving you as you say he_
    _does, he should have known just what you would do when you were_
    _desperate.  He should have killed you rather than let you come up_
    _here--and to me, of all people!  God in Heaven!"_
    
    _"But he didn't know!"_
    
    _"If he didn't guess it without being told, he'll never know_

 _anything about you and your precious mind."_ *

 

 

 

Would Ashley have allowed Melly to go? Knowing or even suspecting what she would have been doing? No, not for a second but it was alright for Scarlett. He was fine with Scarlett selling herself because to him she was nothing more than ..

Charles nor Frank nor any man of her acquaintance would have let Scarlett go. No man that really loved her would let her go, they would have committed highway robbery rather than let her go. Yet Ashley had, if he had said a single word to her, asked her not to go, knowing what it would cost her, but he had stayed mute, letting her go to get the money to keep him and Melly safe. How little he must think of her, how expendable she must be to him. And she had been fool enough to keep him and grovel to him, hoping that he would love her. She had been played for a fool, willingly and she felt sick with shame and disgust at herself.

She wanted to cry and rage at the heavens, she wanted to scratch out Ashley's eyes and she curled her nails into her palms to stop herself from shouting oaths that would have made her mother blush.

“You're not worth it, Ashley Wilkes. You're not worth anything to me. Your wife is worth a thousand of you. And if I ever really loved you, I don't now and never will again.”

Scarlett wondered if true love was ever possible in a marriage. Didn't Rhett once tell her it was the height of bad form for a husband and wife to love each other?

He was wrong, Grace and Hank loved each other as did Athena and Stephen, and if she was honest, Ashley and Melly.

Maybe it was she that was never destined to love and be loved.

“You must like this painting Scarlett, you have been staring at it for ages.” Athena said, interrupting Scarlett's thoughts.

Scarlett tried to smile but faltered. Sensing Athena expected an answer she said, “Yes, it's wonderful.”

Athena cocked her head to the side. “Hmm,” She stepped between Scarlett and the painting on the wall. “Tell me, do you think the wolf looks realistic?”

“Oh yes, very.” Scarlett said.

“Ha, I knew it.” Athena stepped back, revealing a painting of a Man of War under sail. “Something on your mind that you care to share with me?”

Scarlett looked at Athena's inquisitive dark eyes and laughed. “Maybe one day, Athena. When I'm feeling stronger.”

“I look forward to it, I have warned you that I would winkle out all your secrets.” “You also told me that every woman has to keep her secrets.”

“Not every woman, only the beautiful ones of which you are one, so I will just need to work harder.” Athena linked her arm to Scarlett's. “ Let's gather up Grace from her reverie of the _Indian Girl at the Grave of Her Lover_ and go to the conservatory to smell the flowers before we meet the gentleman in the tea garden.”

Athena tightened her grip on Scarlett's arm. “You know my dear, life will go on as long as love is there for the taking. Let that be my lesson to you. Now let's talk scandal about that woman over there in that ridiculous hat.” And she led Scarlett through the gallery towards Grace.

 

_**So there you go. Obviously the asterisked lines are directly from MM's Gone With The Wind – I always have thought that was such a big give away by Rhett.** _

 

 _**The author of the book that Scarlett was reading was Mark Twain/Sam Clemens who worked as a news reporter in San Francisco at about the same time as this ff. is set. The quote she read aloud came from a collection of short stories titled** _ _**"The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County”** _

 

The Woodward Gardens were real and they must have been truly amazing. I do suggest you google them and see for yourselves.

Finally, as some of you may know, I used to post theme songs for the Oldie But Goodies on the yahoo archive site – I found what I think is a very appropriate song for this story, I hope you agree.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H_qN1-Unnk0

 


	16. For all sad word of tongue and pen,  The saddest of these – It might have been.

Rather surprising that I am updating so quickly with this story, I know. Actually I think it is unheard of. I give a strong warning, it is very, very long and I have no doubt reading it will be a test of your mettle but I hope you find it worth the effort. 

**Chapter 16**
    **For all sad word of tongue and pen,**
    **The saddest of these – It might have been. John Greenleaf Whittier**
    

 

Since the day at the gardens and her realization of Ashley, Scarlett had felt as if a weight had been lifted. Her spirit felt as bright as when she was a young girl with no worries other than what dress to wear and what devilment she could get up to without Mammy's knowledge. She was warm and well fed, she was beautifully gowned and admired. Most importantly, she had two true friends.

These friends had made her think of Melly and how much she owed to her. In her next letter of reply to Melly's weekly missive of the children, Scarlett had added a poste script.

“ _Dearest Melly, I thought of you last night. I suddenly remembered the time when you hit me with the rug when my dress was on fire, after the Yankees came back to Tara - do you remember that terrible day? You saved my life that day and you helped save Tara. Did I ever thank you?_

_You have always been there for me when I've needed you Melly and you have done more for me than any sister.”_

Scarlett was pleased with herself for telling Melly her feelings. She had no doubt it would make Melly happy and she was sincere in her words. It was easier to see Melly as a friend and an ally now that she no longer saw her as an adversary to Ashley's affections.

And if by chance, Melly told Ashley of Scarlett's note, all the better. He may then realize he was no longer the apple of her eye.

Telling Rhett of her awakening was more problematic however. She couldn't think of a way to let him know. It's not something she could just say in passing - 'Oh by the way, I don't love Ashley and I was a fool to think I ever did, in case you are interested.'

No, it wasn't something a wife should say to her husband, even if he was her husband in name only.

Her husband....Scarlett felt as though she wasn't his wife at all. She felt as if she was a doll, to be played with, dressed in different outfits and carried around as a favourite toy until the child grew bored and soon the doll would be left on the shelf, ignored for some newer, shinier toy.

Would Rhett leave her on a shelf? Was he already bored with her? This idea bit into her and she tried to shake it off. It was her vanity no doubt, that caused this idea to hurt, she was used to men wanting her, especially her husbands and yet Rhett was not like other men.

It was Rhett's turn to catch Scarlett staring at him, a quizzical, wondering look on her face.

“Is there something on your mind, Scarlett,” Rhett said blandly “ Something you want to ask me?”

But Scarlett had learned from the master of evasion and quickly said, “No Rhett, I was just wondering if my paisley shawl would work with my maroon dress.”

Rhett was convinced she was lying but he couldn't be sure if her thoughts had been on the sainted Mr. Wilkes or something else.

Scarlett had put her mind to making Rhett want to keep her, even as a doll, and so she began a full assault on him. Hadn't she been the belle of five counties, all men were the same, you just needed to know how to handle them. Though none of her tricks had worked before on Rhett - she had come close, briefly, in the jail when but for her hands....

“ Your new waistcoat is so handsome Rhett, almost as handsome as you!”

Rhett's eyes narrowed. “Number one, it is not new and number two, what are you up to Scarlett?”

“Nothing!” Scarlett's cheeks grew pink. “Can't I say something nice about my husband? You were just saying the other day I never compliment you and then I when I do, you think I am up to something.”

“Of course, how unmannerly of me. Thank you for the compliment, it is very kind of you.” He looked into Scarlett's eyes, trying to read her trickery.

“Yes - well – good. Your welcome.” Scarlett said breaking his stare.

She was scheming something - what he didn't know but he would give her enough rope to hang herself.

“Would you care to take a walk around the neighbourhood?”

“ I would like nothing better but I'm expecting Rosie for her mathematics lesson.”

“Of course you are.” Rhett said with a sneer. “How convenient.”

Scarlett surprised him though. “Could we do it in an hour? It would be lovely to take a walk with you.”

What was her game, he wondered. He wasn't going to make it easy for her.

“Sadly no, I have plans to meet with Ian for a sail in an hour. Shall we make it for another day, my pet?”

He noticed her flinch slightly, though he wasn't sure why.

“Fine Rhett, until another day.” Scarlett said, smarting at that hateful term 'pet'.

A knock came at the door and Rosie burst in with a flurry of dropping papers and rolling pencils. “Oh Miss Scarlett, I'm ever so sorry I'm late. Hello Uncle Rhett, - oh your waistcoat is ever so lovely, I wish Papa wore waistcoats like yours but I am ever so sure he wouldn't look so handsome.”

“Are you sure you are tutoring her in mathematics and not southern belle simp, Scarlett?”

Scarlett eyes flashed. “I think you could do with some tutoring on taking a compliment graciously, Rhett Butler! Don't you have some place you would rather be, dear husband?”

Rhett laughed, “Thank you Rosie for your compliment. I shall make myself scarce now so that your tutelage can begin, my dear wife.”

Rosie watched Rhett leave and Scarlett scowl.

“I'm ever so sorry, Miss Scarlett, did I say something wrong, is this a bad time for our lesson?”

Scarlett looked at the young girl and shook her head. “No Rosie, it is a very good time to work on numbers, they make sense at least. Now I think we were working on fractions last time, get out your pencil and let's see how much you remember.”

 

*************

 

She heard the low rumbling in her subconscious. It steadily grew louder and more frequent.

'They're so close, hold them back Joe, hold them back. Kennesaw Mountain is only twenty two miles from here. The Yankees will never get past us, the Mountain is impregnable. Will the guns ever stop, all day, all night - they are killing us in our own homes.

Joe can't stop them, there is too many, they keep coming, their cannons are killing us all.

Retreat, fall back, retreat, fall back. Yankees in Georgia, there's Yankees here, they'll be in Atlanta soon. When the road to the South is cut we won't be able to get out. I want to go home to my mother, I want to go to Tara. I have to get home and I'll kill anyone who tries to stop me.'

Scarlett woke in terror. Yankees....the rumbling began again. She sat up, she wasn't in Atlanta in her bedroom at Aunt Pitty's, she was in San Francisco with Rhett.

Pushing back the bed clothes, Scarlett darted up - the room was dark, the only light coming from the coal fire and dimly shining up the stairs.

“Rhett, Rhett!! Rhett come quickly.” she tried to strike a light for the paraffin lamp, three times the parlor matches broke before she was able to put the fire to the wick, illuminating the room. She sped into the washroom and back.

“Rhett!” She cried again. “Think Scarlett, think!”

She pulled over a the hard chair by the front window and climbed it, trying to reach one of the pieces of luggage on top of the wardrobe.

Rhett came running up the stairs, his hair mussed but his eyes were alert. Scarlett pulled down one of the bags, causing three others to topple.

“Rhett, hurry, get your boots on, hurry.” She said as she jumped off the chair and grabbing a large carry-all, flew to her vanity.

“Why don't you hurry, can't you hear that? The Yankees - they're shelling San Francisco. We must get out before it's too late!”

Scarlett pulled open the top of the drawer of the elegant vanity so violently it fell to the floor, she snatched the blue glove box, putting it in the leather carry-all.

Rhett caught hold of Scarlett as she moved back towards the wardrobe. “Stop it, Scarlett.” He held her tightly. “What is this all about? Were you dreaming?”

“Let me go, Rhett – the Yankees are here!” Scarlett struggled to get free but Rhett was too strong.

“The Yankees have always been here, dearest. Stay still, sshhh, stop now, it was a bad dream.”

“It wasn't a dream, I tell you....” The noise of the cannon began again. “Hear that? That's cannon! If I know anything, I know that sound. Now do you believe me?”

Rhett still held her. “Oh my dearest, yes it is cannon.” Scarlett tried again to break from him. “But it isn't the Yankees. It's the fog signal.”

Rhett could feel her trembling and he tightened his arms around her. “Sshhh now, sshh.”

Rhett pressed his cheek against her hair. “The fog is heavy tonight. They have cannons set up around the harbour to prevent ships from coming too close to the rocks. The harbour is deep but the outer shoals are very rocky and fog blinds the ships trying to make port, it's hard for even experienced pilots to find their way when the fog is thick as it is tonight.”

He could feel her body slowly relax as he calmly spoke to her.

“They need to have some sense of where the rocks are before they crash on them. Listen closely, can you hear that bell?”

Scarlett could hear a far off bell ringing. It stopped and started every few minutes.

She nodded her head against Rhett's chest.

“That is another method they have but the bell is too faint for the ships farthest out by the opening of the harbour - that's why they use the cannons.”

“Why don't they use lights and why can I hear it so clearly if it is so far away?”

“Fog is a funny thing, light bounces back on it and yet sound seems to be clearer with it. Fog is every sailor's nightmare, one of them at least.” Rhett released his tight hold on her but Scarlett stayed close to him.

“Now, I suggest you get back into bed.” he said as he pulled away from her.

Scarlett shivered as she lost the warmth of Rhett's arms.

Rhett led her back to bed and tucked the bedclothes tightly around her.

“Would you like me to heat up some milk for you?”

Scarlett made a face. “I would prefer some brandy.”

“I'll get you a glass.” Rhett went back down the stairs and quickly returned with two glasses, giving one to Scarlett.

He pulled the chair Scarlett had used to get the carry-all over by the bed and sat down. “I'm sorry, Scarlett – I should have warned you about the fog signals. I never thought that they would frighten you.”

“It's the not knowing what was happening that scared me most.” Scarlett said. She sipped the brandy, feeling it's familiar warmth again. It had been a long time since she had any liquor stronger than wine.

“It brought back the nightmare of those days in Atlanta.” she said. “Ha, I thought things couldn't get any worse back then - I was wrong.”

“Things are better now though, aren't they?”

“Much, thanks to you.” she sipped again from her glass. They sat quietly, companionably.

“Where were you, when I called for you, I didn't know where you were or if you were even here.”

“I had fallen asleep on the sofa downstairs.”

“Without your boots on? It seems to me you prefer to sleep on the sofa.”

Rhett stayed mute.

“Why don't you sleep in bed with me, Rhett. Do I snore?”

Rhett smiled, trying to come up with a plausible answer.

“No, you don't snore but you do have a tendency to take all the covers.”

Scarlett didn't seem satisfied with his answer.

“You must remember, Scarlett, I am not used to sharing a bed.”  
“Oh really, since when?”

Rhett took a sip from his glass.

“Do you take me for a fool, Rhett?” Scarlett said quietly, not wanting to cause an argument.

“In most things no, in others....” Rhett shrugged.

Scarlett felt sure Rhett was meaning Ashley, here was her chance to tell him.

“What things am I foolish about?” she said, pressing him.

Rhett looked at her, no not that trap, he had to hold with his plan – if he brought up Scarlett's foolish love of Ashley she would know that his sympathy of Ashley was all a sham.

“Your taste in hats, my dear. Bigger is not necessarily better.” Rhett gulped down the rest of his brandy. “I will let you get some sleep now. Good night my dear, sleep well. I will be gone before you are awake, no doubt. I'm expecting a wire from Mr. Thompson tomorrow. Shall we have coffee and discuss things?”

“Why don't you come to bed?”

“I'm awake now, I doubt I could sleep again. It's close to dawn anyway.” Rhett stood up and moved the chair back to it's place. “Is there anything you need?”

Scarlett slowly shook her head. She would have liked him to have held her until she had fallen asleep. Maybe he would think she was suggesting he... no, she couldn't ask. She had learned that lesson in New Orleans, never again would she be that wanton, not that Rhett would have wanted her anyway.

“Pleasant dreams then, Scarlett.” Rhett said softly. “If you need me again, just call out.”

Rhett went back down the stairs and Scarlett gulped down the rest of her brandy before turning down the lamp.

She was becoming the doll on the shelf and soon he would simply ignore her. She turned on her side and curled up, holding onto the soft pillow. A tear came to her eye, rolling slowly down her cheek, it was followed by another and then another.

“I swear I have never cried so much as I have here in San Francisco.” Scarlett thought as she rubbed her face against the pillow, clutching it against her body.

She wanted to go home, she wanted to run from all of this, she wanted...Scarlett couldn't think of what she wanted but she felt very lonely somehow. For all the kindness and friendship of Grace and Athena, she felt lost and alone. She lay still, trying to put her hurt away, and listened to the now nonthreatening cannon and the faint bells protecting the sailors at sea.

 

Rhett poked at the fire, bringing the flame back to the coals. This was the closest he had been to her in a long time. Her thin nightgown was negligible and her body had pressed tightly against his. How easy it would have been for him to give in to his desire of her, she would have been accepting though possibly not enthusiastic and that is not what he wanted.

He ran his hands through his hair and looked at the flame.

That blue box, it had been the first thing she had wanted to save, before her jewels, her gowns, even before the sketch of Tara.

Rhett jammed the poker into the fire, sparks flew up the chimney.

He had caught Scarlett looking through whatever was in the glove box before, she would quickly close it up and put it back in the vanity's drawer whenever he had come up to the bedroom. What was in it that was so important to her ?

He could have easily looked himself, when Scarlett was up at the main house with Grace or out shopping with Athena but he feared what he would find. Daguerreotype of Ashley in his uniform, her diary of love to her white prince. Opening it may be opening a Pandora's Box, releasing all Scarlett's thoughts, proving his madness at marrying a woman that loved another man. He was a coward and couldn't face what secrets that box held.

He sat back on the sofa and punched the overstuffed cushions trying to find a comfortable position on what was his bed.

She had been frightened tonight and it had been his words, his arms that had calmed her. Why couldn't she see things clearly, why couldn't she feel his love? What more did he need to do to show her?

Visions of Scarlett flitted through his mind. Scarlett in her green sprigged dress surrounded by beaux at the barbeque, Scarlett's face, so desperate to dance at the bazaar, her smile when she saw the bonnet he had brought her from Paris, Scarlett's fear and determination to flee Atlanta.

Rhett stretched out, his long legs hanging over the arm of the sofa.

More memories, Scarlett in the jail, her eyes coldly calculating, ready to sell herself for her Tara. She had almost caught him, he had almost believed she cared for him then - but for her hands.

Rhett stood up and went to the window, pushing aside the drapes, seeing the mist floating through the early light over the garden.

He felt he had a part of her but it wasn't enough. Unless he had all of Scarlett, her mind, body and soul, he would never be content. She was waiting for the time he would take her back to Atlanta, waiting for her return to Ashley, that is why she looked at him with a yearning.. She hadn't asked him when but he knew that is what she wanted and he couldn't think of what else he could do before he bowed to the inevitable. Time was coming for him to fold his cards.

He would give it another a fortnight, and if by then she hadn't told him she loved him, hadn't given herself entirely to him, he would start the arrangements to return Scarlett back to Atlanta. He would accompany her there and then maybe he would take a long voyage somewhere to Europe, back to Paris or Italy. He needed to leave America, leave Scarlett forever.

He pulled his boots on and took his greatcoat down from the the coat tree. Standing before the mirror on the wall, he pulled on the leather gloves from the pocket and put on his black hat and gave a wink to himself, Paris was filled with other women, women that wanted him. None of them were Scarlett though.

He quietly opened the door and left for the stables. His ride would be longer than usual today.

** *******

With a light tap at the door, Grace entered Hank's study where Hank and Rhett were discussing the newest gold find at Vital Creek. They were debating the viability of sending a team up to the colony of British Columbia to stake a claim or buy up those already staked.

“Sorry to interrupt you but do you know where the children are?”

“No my love, I haven't seen them since breakfast. Are they not in their nursery?”

“No, nor in the kitchen. I have searched everywhere and they need to get ready for the tea.

“I don't suppose they are in the school room.” Hank said with a twinkle in his eye.

“Oh Hank, I think I can safely assume they are not there.” Grace smiled back.

“ Would you like me to search for them in the gardens?” Rhett said.

“Thank you Rhett, that is kind of you. And if you find them, could you please send them in so they can get washed and changed into their good clothes.

Rhett strolled outside, the scent of the sea was strong, it foretold a heavy fog coming in. He paused to take a cigar from his pocket case and he saw the gardener bending over, wrapping burlap around the base of a young oleander bush.

“Hello Chin.” Rhett said, offering a cigar to the small man.

Chin straightened up and nodded his head. Taking the cigar, he put it away in a inner pocket of his black cotton jacket.

“I'm on the hunt for the children. Any ideas where I might find them?”

Chin nodded again, this time towards the stand of Monterey pines below the guest house.

“Thanks. Here, take another.” Rhett passed another cigar to the man and moved down the path way towards the tall trees.

As he made his past the small cottage and on to the trail leading down to the copse of towering trees, he could hear Rosie shouting and then Scarlett's voice saying something indistinct.

Standing slightly above the stand, he saw Rosie at the base of one of the largest trees, Rhett walked down the path, keeping to the edge, out of sight. At the bottom of the trail he could see Rex straddling a branch about half way up a large Monterey pine, clutching on to the tree trunk for dear life and Scarlett....Scarlett was climbing the tree with her feet bare and her skirts pulled up to her thighs.

Rhett stood back so he could watch, ready to step in if his help was needed.

“Rex, stop crying – why crying never helped anyone. You have to listen to me.” Scarlett said calmly as she posed on one of the lower branches.

“I'm stuck, I can't down!” Rex bawled.

“Of course you can get down, you got up didn't you? That's much harder than getting down, I bet you could get down with your eyes closed. No, don't close your eyes, keep them open and look at me.”

“Listen to Miss Scarlett, Rex.” Rosie shouted.

“Now Rex, you see that branch just underneath you? Hold on to the trunk and step down onto it.”

“I can't!”

“Well, I think you can – aren't you that brave boy that would slay dragons for me?” Rhett ears pricked up, so Scarlett had another dragon slayer.

Rex snuffled and nodded his head. “Fine then. Now Sir Rex, I bid you step down to that branch beside you.”

Rex cautiously did as he was told, still with a look of terror.

“Excellent, you are almost home free. Now do you see that crooked branch on your left, sit down and stretch your feet towards it – that's it, now lower yourself down on to it.”

Rex hesitated, “It will be fine, Rex – I promise.” Scarlett said.

Rex was successful and began to smile.

“Why Rex, I think you must be part monkey.”

Rex obviously was feeling better as he began to mimic a monkey's hoot and dance.

“Don't get too ahead of yourself, Mister.”

By now Rex was only two branches higher than Scarlett.

“The next one is easy, can you work it out yourself?” Rex grinned and slipped down to the branch just above Scarlett.

“Amazing, now just like you going down stairs, go to the next one.”

Rex was now parallel to Scarlett.

“This is the tricky bit, you are going to have to shinny down the rest of the way. Use your feet and your hands and crawl down, the bark is thick and you will have lots of holds. Are you ready, Sir Rex?”

“Ready Lady Scarlett!” And Rex smoothly slipped down the rest of the trunk, landing beside his sister.

Rosie hugged her brother tightly and said, “I was ever so scared for you, Rex. That's why I called Miss Scarlett.”

The children looked up at Scarlett. “You can come down now, Miss Scarlett.” Rosie called up.

“Easier said than done.” thought Scarlett. There was at least an eight foot drop down to the ground and though she had shinnied up the trunk well enough, getting down was going to be another thing.

“Rex, you need to close your eyes.” Scarlett called down.

“Why?”

“Because I am going to have to pull up my skirts and it wouldn't be proper for you to look. Now close your eyes tight.”

“Ahhh”

“Hush Rex and close your eyes.” Rosie scolded. “Miss Scarlett, would you like me to come and help you?”

“No! No Rosie, I think if I just..” Scarlett had hiked her tight skirt as far up her legs as possible, Rhett saw the flash of white starkly standing out against the darkness of the tree trunk. He edged forward as Scarlett attempted her climb down.

“It's easier going down than up.” Rex called up, his hands covering his eyes.

“Not if you are in a dress,” muttered Scarlett.

Using the knots in the tree as holds, Scarlett slowly began to inch down. She held tightly to the rough bark and slid her bare feet down, blindly searching for the next hold. The folds of her skirt held her tightly and she couldn't stretch out her legs. Climbing up and down trees had been much easier when she was a little girl in short skirts.

As she clung on, her fingers gripped to the tree, releasing the spicy pine scent, she wondered what a sight she must be – wouldn't Rhett laugh if he could see her now. Thank God he was with Hank.

With a deep breath in, believing her feet could hold her, she briefly let go with her left hand, hoping to find another hold just as her feet began to slip on the mossy bark.

Scarlett madly began to scrabble for another hold as she began to slide down, her feet lost their holds and she fell, her body instantly preparing for the hard landing when she was caught in Rhett's arms. Scarlett held tightly to Rhett, shaking with relief and surprise.

“Why Scarlett, you don't need to throw yourself at me.” Rhett said.

The children giggled.

“Uncle Rhett, you came just in time! You are a hero!”

Scarlett regained her senses and scowled. “Put me down, Rhett.”

Rhett grin immediately faded. “As you wish, m'lady.”

He placed her on her feet and Scarlett pushed down her skirts, blushing beet red that Rhett should have seen her in such a position.

“You are a real knight in shining armour, Uncle Rhett!” Rosie said.

“ I saw a lady in distress - any gentleman would have done the same thing. No doubt you were ready to save our 'Lady', Rex – my legs are longer and that is why I got to her faster.”

Scarlett stood shaking from shock, the cold from the damp of the pine needles under her feet chilled her.

“And it was a lucky happenstance that I came when I did. I was sent by your mother to implore you to go get ready for the party and if I know anything about ladies and their party preparations it would be a good idea to do exactly as asked and quickly.”

Rex frowned. “I hate parties, all Mother's friends pinch my cheeks and it hurts.”

Rhett nodded in agreement. “Older women have that tendency. But then the plus side to any party is the special food, I heard there may be chocolate ice cream. It is one of my favourites.”

“Mine too!” Rex brightened up. “Race you to the house, Rosie. On your marks, get set, go!” Rex sped off.

“Hey, that's not a fair start!” Rosie said as she chased after her brother.

Rhett bent down and picked up Scarlett's shoes and stockings.

“Would you like to put them on or would you prefer me to carry you?”

“Neither thank you.” Scarlett said as she snatched her things from Rhett, her face still blushing madly. “ I can walk without them and without you.”  
“As you wish.”

Scarlett strode off towards the house. Things would have been fine if she hadn't stepped on a sharp stick. With a cry she fell.

“Damn it, Scarlett – why is it always so hard for you to accept help?” Rhett said as he picked her up into his arms. “Let me take care of you.”

“Why do you want to help me?”

“You're my wife, I am supposed to help you.” Rhett said matter of factly.

Scarlett didn't struggle, it felt nice to be in Rhett's strong arms. He made his way up the pathway to the cottage. At the doorway, he gently placed Scarlett down and led her into the house to the stuffed chair by the fire.

“Alice!” he called out. He knelt down and began rubbing Scarlett's feet, warming them.

Alice came down the stairs and Rhett said, “I'm glad you're here Alice. Scarlett has been pretending she is a lumberjack and needs a hot bath, go draw her one. Is there coffee in the kitchen?”

“Yes sir, I just made a pot. Shall I bring in a tray?”  
“No, I can manage that, you just get the bath filled.”

“Really Rhett, I am not an invalid. My feet are cold is all.”

“Alice, do you have iodine?”

“I think so, sir, in the medicine cabinet. Shall I get it?”  
“Yes and some cotton.”

“Oh Rhett, you are being silly, I just got a little scrape.”  
“A little scrape that could become infected very easily.”

Rhett went into the kitchen and Scarlett heard the water running in the bath upstairs. He came back into the parlour carrying a cup and saucer and placed it on the table beside Scarlett as Alice returned with a dark bottle and a packet of cotton.

“Thank you, Alice.”

Rhett returned to the kitchen and quickly returned, drying his hands on a small towel. He knelt down before Scarlett and lifted her foot.

Scarlett flinched and tried to pull her foot away. “Stop it, Rhett.”

Rhett held her foot firmly and said “No Scarlett, you stop. Let me look at your foot. Drink your coffee.”

“Oh yes, Lord and Master.” Scarlett sneered.

Rhett gently ran his finger over Scarlett's foot making her giggle. “You're tickling me now.”  
“I am feeling for any splinters. Try to keep still.”

Scarlett sipped her coffee, savouring the rich flavour. “I remember how I used to crave the taste of coffee during the war.”

“And what else did you crave? Visits from a handsome young scoundrel offering you piddling papers of pins and ribbons and bonnets from the Rue de la Pais?”

Scarlett was about to come up with some stinging reply but she stopped herself.

“Sometimes.” Scarlett said

Rhett looked up at her, her eyes met his. “If I'd known that I would have been a more frequent visitor to Miss Pitty's house.”

He tore some of the cotton from the package and soaked it with the brown liquid from the bottle.

“This may sting a bit but it's for your own good.”

“You sound like Mammy when she would...Holy Mary, Mother of God, Rhett what are you doing?” Scarlett yelped as Rhett wiped the scratch with iodine. “Stop it!”

Rhett held tightly to the foot and softly blew on it. “Hush, it will stop stinging in a minute. The pain shows the iodine is working.”

“Why are you doing this to me?” Scarlett said as she tried not to squirm.

Rhett laughed, “Because I would hate for this pretty foot to be amputated due to gangrene. You wouldn't be much a dancing partner with only one foot.”

Alice came back down the stairs. “Your bath is ready Miss Scarlett.”

“Thank God. May I please have my foot back now?”

“Your foot is yours to do with as you wish. Alice, see if she will let you put a bandage on her foot, it should be covered.”

Scarlett stood up and limped over to the stairs.

“Don't take long, we should be at the house in an hour.” Rhett said to her as he gathered up the used cotton.

“I'll be ready.” Scarlett said. Half way up the stairs, she stopped and looked back at him. “ You are going to escort me, aren't you Rhett?”  
“Unless you have had any better offers, I will escort you.” Rhett grinned.

“Hmm, no - I guess you will have to do.” Scarlett said with a smile.

Scarlett was ready in an hour and a half but the way she was turned out was worth the wait. Her deep purple gown edged with small golden tassels swept back up into the bustle. It accented her flat stomach and high breasts, her decolletage modestly peeped out at the diamond shaped neckline. The purple gave emphasis to her black hair and her white skin. Surprisingly, she hadn't bothered with any jewellery aside from her wedding rings and her hair was dressed in a simple chignon. Scarlett looked like a lady, a grand lady.

“Will I pass inspection?” she asked.

“Why, are you worried?”

“To be honest, yes. I don't know what dragons there are going to be at the tea but I am sure they will all be wanting to pounce on any mistake I might make.”

“I would have expected you to put on your war paint and dripped yourself with every jewel I have bought you.”

“I thought about it but Alice suggested simplicity would be better.”

“You look lovely, Scarlett. How is your foot?”  
“Fine.” Scarlett pulled back her skirts, showing her high heeled foot. “I never knew you were such a good nurse.”

“I had to be. As Captain of a blockade runner, I had to know how to patch up my crew after any surprises from the Yankee navy.”

“You could have worked with Dr. Meade in the hospital.”

Rhett laughed, “I'm sure that would have only caused more bloodshed.”

They walked out the door and along the path to the house. Scarlett seemed to be dawdling, pausing at the small fountain and looking at the robins washing themselves in the water.

“Do you know anyone that will be at the tea today?”

“No, I doubt it.” Rhett said. “Shall we see?”

But Scarlett shrugged and stood watching Chin digging small holes in the garden bed, planting bulbs.

“Scarlett, are you nervous. I thought you loved parties.”

“I'm not nervous, not really. It's just...”  
“Just what?”

“Well if you must know, I don't want to embarrass Grace.”

“I doubt you could ever embarrass Grace, but it's nice that you are thinking of someone other than yourself for once.”

Scarlett ignored his dig. “Alice told me this tea was the opening of the season here in San Francisco. She said that all the most important people of society would be here.”

“I wouldn't know. When I was here in California there was no such thing as society or seasons. I do know, however, it is rude to one's hostess to show up late, so we should move along.”

Scarlett stopped Rhett, putting her hand on his arm. “Rhett, will you stay close to me? Just until I find my feet?”  
She looked so young, like a girl going to her first ball. Rhett sensed she really did care about making a good first impression for Grace's sake.

“If you wish, but I don't imagine it take long for you to feel at home.”

Rhett tucked Scarlett's arm in his and led her to the house.

 

Throngs of people were already there with more coming. Grace and Hank stood in the front hall, greeting each guest, with Rosie and Rex beside them.

“Oh poor Rex, practically every woman is pinching his cheek.” Scarlett laughed.

They made their way down the line towards their hosts.

“Ah, the honeymooners. I wondered when you would show up. No doubt you had other things on your mind than the time.” Hank grinned.

“Scarlett, how perfectly lovely you look.” Grace said as she shook hands. “Athena is in the drawing room and she asked me to have you join her there when you arrived.”

Grace moved closer to Scarlett, “Don't worry, my dear. It won't be long before everyone will be asking me about my beautiful house guest and how did I come upon such a lovely lady.”

Pressing Scarlett's hand, Grace moved on to the couple behind. Rosie politely curtsied to them and Rex took Scarlett's hand and kissed it, making Rosie giggle.

As Scarlett and Rhett moved away, Rhett said, “Tell me, is there any male between the ages of nine and ninety that isn't in love with you, Scarlett?”

“I can think of at least one.” she said, glancing around the crowd. She didn't see the scowl on Rhett's face.

“I think I will go to the billiard room, I'm sure you can make your own way now.” Rhett bowed and left her, pushing his way through the crush, leaving Scarlett alone. She couldn't follow him as the crowd was too large and besides, the billiard room was for gentleman only.

Scarlett made her through the throngs of San Franciscan society, nodding her head politely and smiling brightly to the strangers around her. Ladies in sweeping gowns of taffeta and silk, gentlemen in suits of tweed and broadcloth greeted one another and glanced at the new comer in their midst.

Passing by the morning room, Scarlett heard a string quartet playing softly as people took cups of tea and chocolate from the enormous silver urns served by white aproned maids. Scarlett saw Alice, in a frilly apron, standing behind a table, pouring out champagne cups and punch to those gathered around. Through the connecting door, Scarlett could see the dining room table laden with food for the most particular of tastes. Small lobster sandwiches, thick slices of ham, thinly sliced bread and butter, cheese platters, cakes, Charlotte mousse and even chocolate and vanilla ice cream. Mrs. Jenkins was keeping a sharp eye on the servants scurrying about and ensuring the guests were satisfied.

Entering the drawing room, Scarlett spied Athena, whose eyes were filled with devilment as she spoke to an elderly lady, stooped over, her pink scalp shining through her thinning grey hair and a sprinkling of black whiskers standing at attention on her chin. She smiled and moved towards her friend.

“Yes Mrs. Spooner, I read it on good authority in the New York Times just last week.”

“I always knew it, it's just as my father told me. You should never believe these scientists.”  
“I so agree, why the next thing they will be telling us is the world is round! Oh here you are Scarlett. Mrs. Spooner may I introduce Mrs. Butler.”  
Scarlett bobbed down, and briefly shook the lady's lace gloved hand, thinking how she looked like a crow in her black high necked dress, a mourning brooch pinned at her neck with the hair of some dead loved one braided in it's center.

Scarlett shivered, she always thought this the most gruesome of fashions.

“Mrs. Spooner and I were just discussing the news that gaslight is perfectly safe. She of course knew it to be false. You can never get anything past you, Mrs. Spooner.” Athena said, her eyes sparking with delight.

Scarlett gasped and tried to hide her laughter.

“Did you say your name was Butler?” Mrs. Spooner said, glaring at Scarlett with rheumy eyes.

“Yes, ma'am.” Scarlett said politely.

“I don't know any Butlers. You may be excused.”

Scarlett stood still, unsure of what to do. Athena spoke up.

“Oh dear, Mrs. Spooner, have you never heard of the Butlers? Why I am surprised, considering your vast knowledge of the great first families. Well, never mind, I'm sure you will find out all about them in Princeton Pedigree Families, you do have a copy, don't you?”

Mrs. Spooner sucked in her sagging mouth. “Of course I do.” obviously lying. She looked again at Scarlett.

“Butler, eh? Yes, it must have slipped my mind. The Butlers of Virginia. Very pleasant to meet you, Mrs. Butler. I want some tea now, where is that girl? I hope Grace has remembered to serve a proper English tea and not that muck, China tea.”

“I'm sure she has, Mrs. Spooner. Why don't you sit down here and I will get a cup for you?”

Mrs. Spooner sat down on the nearest chair, holding her cane tightly.

“Come Scarlett, we must find some tea for Mrs. Spooner, Do you know she is from the Spooner family of Massachusetts...” And Athena led Scarlett away from the harridan.

Scarlett couldn't hold her laughter any longer. “Oh Athena, you are wicked.”

“No I'm not. She is though. She never has anything good to say about anyone and she deserves everything she gets.”

“Is there actually a book called Princeton Pedigree Families?”

“No, but she doesn't know that.”

Athena spied a neatly dressed maid taking the tea pot to the kitchen. “Deirdre, is there still some tea in that pot.”

“Yes ma'am but it is the end of the pot and it's wicked strong, ma'am.”

“Perfect, pour out a cup and take it to Mrs. Spooner, she likes her tea strong. And get her a piece of that chocolate cake too, that should keep her quiet.”

“Athena, I thought Grace didn't enjoy the social life here in San Francisco.”

“She doesn't, she prefers her family and her newspaper to tea and scandal.”

“Then why is she hosting this reception?”

“It's really in honour of her mother. Mrs. Preston was instrumental in getting San Francisco's first opera company and every year on the day of the premiere of the opera season, Mrs. Preston always gave a tea for all the supporters. When she died, Mr. Preston thought it should be continued and then later, with Mrs. Jenkins help, Grace took over when she was just sixteen.”

The room was crowded with fashionably dressed women, sipping at their tea and daintly eating their small sandwiches and petit fours. They chattered with each other and glanced at the dark haired woman standing with Athena Tremont. A few of them smiled at Scarlett and hoped for an introduction.

“They aren't all harpies, some of them are very nice ladies. I will introduce you to them and we will see if we can avoid the rest, alright?” Athena whispered to Scarlett.

Taking Scarlett by the arm, Athena led her to two ladies sitting at one of the round tables that had been set up around the room.

“Oh Athena, good day, my dear. How are you?” the older of the two said as they approached.

“Very well, thank you Joan. I would like to introduce you to Grace's house guest, Mrs. Fairall, Mrs. Huggins may I present Mrs. Butler.”

How do you does were exchanged. The ladies were obviously related as they shared beautiful chestnut hair, blue eyes and friendly smiles.

“Would you care to join us Mrs. Butler?” said the older lady. “Penelope, scoot your chair over for Mrs. Butler.”

“Yes, Mama. Please set yourself down, Mrs. Butler.” Penelope said as she moved her chair.

Athena shook her head, “I have to take Scarlett to meet a few of the other ladies first, shall we come back in a little bit?”

“That would be fine. We are dying to have a chat with you, Mrs. Butler. We have heard you came all the way from Georgia and you are your honeymoon but other than that we know nothing. You must let us get to know you better.”

Scarlett gave a small curtsy and smiled cheerfully. “Why I'd like nothing better.”

“I love how you talk!” Penelope said.

Athena laughed, “We'll come back soon but don't blame us if can't understand a thing we say with our Southern drawls. They'll be thick as molasses.”

They all laughed and Athena led Scarlett around the room, choosing tables of ladies to introduce Scarlett and avoiding others.

Scarlett could sense that most of the ladies were talking about her but she didn't mind. She decided that the ladies that Athena avoided were poorly dressed and not the least bit as attractive as her and the ladies she met were as charming a group as she had ever met.

They returned back to Mrs. Fairall and Mrs. Huggins table and Scarlett sat beside Penelope.

“I am famished for some tea, I will just get Deirdre to bring us some, Scarlett, a fresh pot I think. Back in moment.” Athena said.

Scarlett was peppered with questions from Penelope and Joan about life in Georgia and about Rhett.

“Was he really a blockade runner, how wonderful!” Mrs. Fairall said.

“Mother, we were rooting for the North, don't you remember?” Penelope teased.

“That doesn't mean I can't appreciate a hero of any stripe.” Mrs. Fairall said back.

Another woman approached the table and a distinct chill came over the ladies.

“Hello Mrs. Fairall, Mrs. Huggins – how charming it is to see you again. I did miss you at my little dance last week.”

“Lady Randolph.” Mrs. Fairall said, the kindness gone from her tone. Penelope simply ignored her but for sweeping her skirts aside.

She was a tall woman, taller than Scarlett, with a long sharp nose. She had auburn hair with pale green eyes flecked with hazel -nothing compared to the brilliant green of Scarlett's eyes, her lashes were rather sparse and her lips were thin. The lip stain she had painted them with had bled into small lines around her mouth and powder heavily coated her face. She was over dressed in low cut dress of acid green with strips of black lace. She looked cold and viscous, like a snake.

Without being invited, she sat in the spare chair beside Scarlett and looked at her, taking in Scarlett's dress, her hair and her face. Scarlett wished she hadn't listened to Alice and had worn her sapphire earrings at a minimum.

“Please introduce me to our little visitor.” she demanded.

Unwilling, Mrs. Fairall said, “Lady Virginia Randolph may I present Mrs. Butler.”

Scarlett slightly bowed her head.

“So this is Rhett's little woman, is it?” Lady Randolph said mockingly.

“Do you know my husband, ma'am?” Scarlett said politely.

Lady Randolph smiled. “You could describe as close friends from years back.”

Scarlett didn't like this woman, she must have been one of those that Athena had described as viragoes.”

“Oh, were you school friends with his mother?” Scarlett said with a sweet, innocent look on her face. She heard the muffled guffaw from Athena behind her.

Lady Randolph ignored Scarlett's implication, though her eyes narrowed.

“Where are you from, Mrs. Butler? Someone told me - some backwater of Georgia, isn't it?”

Scarlett kept her poise. “I am originally from Clayton County but we now reside in Atlanta.”

“That's right and you work in a shop or something?”

Scarlett's back was up now but she wasn't going to let this woman get the best of her.

“Actually, I own a large store and two lumber mills, I have people that work for me.”

Scarlett could sense without seeing, the Missus Fairall and Huggins smile. Her eyes were locked on her adversary.

“I have never felt it was very feminine for a lady to work. Best to leave these things to the men, don't you agree ladies?” Lady Randolph said, slowly fluttering her fan of peacock feathers.

“No I don't agree, Mrs – oh was it Miss or Mrs.?”

“I'm a Lady.” the woman emphasized the word.

“Really? Isn't that extraordinary.”Scarlett said. “ As I was saying, my mind is as sharp as any man's so why should I waste it sitting at home eating too many bonbons?”

Scarlett could see how tightly laced Virginia was but even still her waist was at least five inches bigger than Scarlett's.

Lady Randolph's false smile dropped and her lips twisted into an unpleasant sneer.

“Tell me dear, has Rhett ever told you the tale of how he got the scar on his abdomen?”  
Scarlett faltered but quickly rallied. “Why, what scar, Mrs. Randolph, my husband has no such scar.”

Virginia smiled again until Scarlett innocently asked, “Did you do much nursing during the War, Mrs. Randolph?”

“It is Lady Randolph and no of course I didn't. Why do you ask?”

Scarlett said, “Oh I was just trying to find a reasonable explanation of why you would have seen a man's scarred abdomen if it wasn't your husband's. Possibly you got it confused.”

Virginia's face mottled with red splotches and she said, “Shall I tell you about your husband, Mrs. Butler..”

Athena interrupted her, “Scarlett come, I want you to meet a very dear friend, you will excuse us ladies? Ginny, you don't mind do you?”

Taking Scarlett's arm and linking it with her own, Athena took Scarlett away from the table. “She hates being called Ginny so I do it at every opportunity.”

Athena led Scarlett into the conservatory. “Well done my dear! If I had no cause to adore you before, I would now. She is a nasty, nasty piece of goods that one. You held your own and bested her. Brava my darling Scarlett, Brava.”

“I think we have both earned a glass of sherry.” Athena stopped another young mad and asked her to deliver two glasses to them.

Athena pulled out a small metal chair by the wrought iron table. “Sit my dear. Now breathe.”

Scarlett did as she was told and felt the release of tension. The girl delivered their glasses and Athena lifted hers. “To my most precious Scarlett.” They sipped the dry wine and relaxed.

“Who was that awful woman, Athena?” Scarlett asked.

Athena laughed. “Awful is too mild a word for her, I have a number of words I could use to describe her but I'm sure my Mammy would come back from the grave and wash my mouth out with soap if I dared. But let me tell you some of Ginny's back story.”

Athena spoke as if she was giving a scholarly lecture.

“ Virginia Hester Randolph, nee Harder is originally from Maryland, she is the youngest of four daughters and her father drank away almost all the money the family had. Before they were down to their last dollar, her mother, Seraphina Harder, who had despised her daughters from the day they were born, packed the four of them off to England to find husbands. She reasoned that England being so far away, no one would know how close to destitution the family had become. She was right, the girls attended all the parties of the season, wearing borrowed jewels and dresses paid for by the final mortgage on their horse estate.

Time was short for them as there was no more money for a second season and their mother insisted they snatch the first man who proposed and get him to the alter before the truth came out.

They all married, following their mother's words 'It is just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as a poor one.'

Ginny was the last and her mother was most pleased with her match for she had married into an old aristocratic family. Priggy was quite a feather in Ginny's cap until she discovered on her honeymoon that he had less money than even her father. His estate was entailed and he had hoped to marry a rich American to help with the upkeep.” Athena started to laugh, breaking her serious tone.

“How I wish I could have been a fly on the wall when that conversation took place! I can just imagine them both angling for each others bank books and the shock on their faces when the true state of affairs came out.”

“The two of them have spent the last number of years travelling from one place to the next, using his name as entry to society and sponging off the nouveau riche who love anyone with a title. They hate each other but they are stuck together, Ginny had tried numerous times to snag another husband, one with more than two cents in his pocket but so far she has been unsuccessful, mostly because the wives of the men she has angled for are too smart.”

Athena raised her glass “To marriage, in all it's varieties.”

Scarlett murmured her reply, “To marriage.”

“Have I ever told you I knew your Rhett back in Charleston?”

Scarlett was surprised. “No, I didn't know.”

“Well I didn't really know him, he was much younger than me, but I knew his family. He would have been about thirteen when I left Charleston. Has Rhett told you about his parents?”

“I met his mother and his sister at our wedding.” Scarlett said.

“That's right, he did have a younger sister and a brother too. I'd forgotten about them. And how is Eugenia, still doing her good works or she dancing on her husband's grave?”

Scarlett looked surprised.

“Oh don't mind me, Scarlett. I am being catty. You see, I always despised Rhett's father and had no respect for his mother. As you can imagine, Charleston is a very small town and everyone knew everyone else's business, so we knew much of what happened in the Butler household as they no doubt knew about my family's.

The honourable Keiran Butler was a bastard, if I can say that word to you without causing too many blushes. He delighted in being the king of his castle and all his family were the serfs, except your Rhett of course, Rhett always had a backbone, even as a young boy. He was always in some kind of trouble with his father and was whipped more often than any race horse. He refused to bow down to his father from the time he was smalland Keiran hated him for it. He always demanded full respect from all of his family and his slaves and his word was the final law.

Eugenia should never have married that man, she is far too gentle a creature. She always tried hard to do what was right for her family but Keiran stepped all over her until finally all she could do were good works for the unfortunate and arrange fine social gatherings so Keiran could strut about like a peacock, showing off to the other fine families of Charleston.

It was because of her I left Charleston. My father wanted me to marry well but the man he chose was cut from the same cloth as Keiran Butler, a man that married for a pedigree not for love, like choosing a prize hunting dog. I saw what kind of life Eugenia had and I balked at the thought of marrying like her. I married for love when Stephen finally proposed and we left Charleston shortly after. I have never regretted it for a second.

Your Rhett has all Eugenia's finer qualities, but also his father's strength. He will never bow down to another but he has the heart of a lover. I always knew when he found love, it would be for life.

I'm glad you are as strong as him though I doubt he would have ever married someone who wasn't, he would never marry for a family pedigree or a simply a pretty face, he would marry only for love and he would only love someone as bold as himself.

It's odd, they say daughters marry their fathers and sons their mothers yet you two are the exception to the rule. You both have married your true mates, strong yet willing to give to each other. It is so pleasant to be around a couple such as you, to be able to see the deep love you share.

Be thankful, Scarlett – you are lucky to have found your match and the two of you will have a long marriage of equals. That is the best of love and the best of marriage.

Ah and here is our Grace.”

Grace made her way over to the table. “Another successful tea, Grace. Do you have a minute to sit with us?”

“I wish I could but I should keep making sure my guests are content. Have you enjoyed yourself, Scarlett or was it awful for you?”  
“Not awful at all, you have some lovely friends, Grace.”  
“And some not so lovely, Scarlett met with our dear Ginny.”Athena informed Grace.  
Grace's brow wrinkled. “Oh dear, was she very horrid?”

“Oh she was in fine form, Grace. But I wish you could have been there to have heard Scarlett's riposte, Ginny was spitting with fury after five minutes with our girl.”

“I have no doubt Scarlett could hold her own against five Ginnys.” Grace laughed. “ You seemed very serious before I came over, what were you talking about?”

“Ancient history and a few facts of life. I was telling Scarlett how lucky she was to marry a man that loved her as much as she loved him.”

They were interrupted by another lady who wanted to discuss the latest news of the new park being planned for the city and whether Grace and Athena would be interested in joining a group of ladies interested in making suggestions in regards to the park.

Scarlett was left out of the discussion but her mind was elsewhere. Rhett loved her? She wanted to laugh at Athena's foolish talk but .... Did Rhett love her? Is that why he married her? If he loved her, then why did he act the way he did towards her? Why did he sleep on sofas and never beg for her?

Because Rhett would never beg for anything. She knew him well enough to know that. Why didn't he tell her....because he was waiting for her to tell him. He was waiting for her to get over her school girl crush of Ashley. The puzzle pieces were beginning to fall into place.

Scarlett stood up, “Excuse me, I'm just going to find Rhett, I have something I need to tell him.”

“Don't be long dear, it doesn't do to make them feel too important.” Athena laughed.

Scarlett curtsied to the ladies and left the conservatory.

The rooms were beginning to clear out as people needed to go home to dress for the opera tonight. Scarlett went from one room to another, searching for Rhett but couldn't find him anywhere.

She decided to try the billiard room, maybe she could signal to him from the doorway. Scarlett went into the connecting hallway and there was Rhett, leaning against the wall with Lady Randolph standing close to him. She was smiling up at him and running her fingers on his lapel.

Scarlett gasped, seeing the two so close and so familiar with one another. Rhett looked up at her. He smiled and leaned towards Ginny, whispering something in her ear. She threw back her head and laughed loudly.

Scarlett felt sick, her face burned in a hot blush and she turned on her heel, running from the hallway, into the reception area and out the door.

 


	17. She Shall Be Mine and I Will Make a Lady of My Own

    _With many thanks to Iris for reading and giving her thoughts on the first draft._
    
    
    
**She shall be mine, and I will make**
**A lady of my own. - William Wordsworth**

 

Scarlett pushed her way through the crowded reception area, rushing past departing guests saying their farewells to their hosts.

Grace noticed her and called out but Scarlett didn't hear her. Grace looked worried and glanced up at Hank before turning back to her company.

Scarlett fled out the front doors, and down the marble steps. Carriages were lined up, waiting to take the guests home and the horses shied up in their harnesses as Scarlett flew past them. The rough gravel bit sharply at her feet through her dainty slippers as she ran over the drive towards the side of the grand house.

Darkness had fallen and a heavy fog had seeped in, clouding her way. Scarlett, used to leaving through the morning room door, was disorientated as she tried to make her way to the cottage and she became twisted around trying to find the usual path. Her dress was snagged by rose bushes and she bumped against a stone bench, painfully cracking her shin. The lights of Belle Reve behind glowed a pale yellow and did little to help guide her as she stumbled into a garden bed. She sobbed out with frustration, trying to see the way to the cottage, to hide from what she had just witnessed.

Struggling to calm herself so she could get her bearings, Scarlett stood up again. The fog cannons had begun sounding their alarm and the bells tolled but for Scarlett, it was the cackling laughter of Virginia that reverberated in her mind.

She started down one way and then turned towards another. How could she be lost in a garden? If she could just collect her thoughts she would find her way but her mind couldn't see anything except Rhett smiling down at Virginia and whispering to her. The mist thickly swirled around Scarlett and she tripped on a large tree root, barely keeping her footing on the mossy lawn she collided against the garden wall, scraping her hands on it's rough stone. She couldn't see the lights from the main house, nor could she hear any guests saying their good byes now. She didn't know which way to turn, what was the way to the sanctuary of the cottage?

“Missy, Missy!” Scarlett heard a voice calling.“Here, Missy.”

She stopped and tried to discern from where the voice was coming.

The small figure of Chin, dressed in his baggy black clothes, came out through the mist carrying a candle lit lantern.

“Is alright, Missy – this way. Come, come Missy.”

Chin waved to her, inviting her to follow him and silently moved off to the right, his soft slippers making no sound. Scarlett followed reluctantly, not sure if the man was leading her to safety or to more horror. Old stories of white slave trade and kidnappings of women by Orientals bubbled up in her mind.

Chin kept saying the same thing, “Is alright, Missy – this way Missy.” as Scarlett slowly followed after him.

She soon felt the small stones of the path under her feet again and dimly ahead she could see lights glowing through the fog, her legs became more sure as she moved towards them.

Chin stood beside the porch of the cottage and he bowed low to her. “Missy home.”

Scarlett shaking, tried to smile at him. “Thank you, Chin.”

“Missy need anything? Chin can help.” He bowed again to her, his small black eyes showing only kindness.

“No, Chin. Thank you, no I don't need anything. You can go now - I'm fine.” Scarlett babbled at him, ashamed of her earlier thoughts of this kind man. “Thank you for helping me.”

He bowed again and left her standing on the porch. Once she could no longer see the faint light of his lantern, Scarlett bolted into the little house.

She leaned back against the door, panting, trying to slow her quick, short breaths and calm her childish fears of the dark. The warmth of the cozy cottage couldn't stop her shivering nor the chills flitting up her spine.

Her body was still tensed, ready to flee and Scarlett rushed up the winding stairs to the refuge of the bedroom. Thankfully Alice was still working in the main house and wouldn't come until Scarlett rang, she could be alone to compose herself.

Though she was safe in what had become her haven, Scarlett wasn't free of the deep ache in her chest. Overcome by her panicked run from the house and pained with a hurt she had never before experienced, Scarlett could feel tears pricking her eyes and willed herself not to cry. What good would it do? Crying wouldn't change anything. She slumped down at her vanity and covered her face with her hands.

Seeing Rhett with that woman and their obvious ease with one another had jarred Scarlett to her very core. The sight of the two of them together, Virginia touching him with the familiarity of an old lover, her comment on Rhett's scar, Rhett's smile at Virginia - all these things had crystallized the faint glimmering Scarlett had felt for the past while - she loved her husband.

She loved him - how, why, when she didn't know but she knew she loved him.

Startled by a sudden thought, she lifted her head from her hands - And he had loved her, that's why he had married her.

“You stupid fool, Scarlett. How could you have been so blind? He loved you all this time and yet you never could see what was so plain to everyone else.”

He even said something – when he gave his proposal, that ridiculous proposal - he had acted the fool and she had been too befuddled with the guilt of Frank's death and the brandy to think clearly but he had wanted her to love him.

“ _Did you ever in your novel reading come across the old situation of the disinterested wife falling in love with her husband?”*_

He had led her towards his love and she had been too dense to see something so obvious. And now, it was too late, he had given up on her and moved on to someone else - she had become the doll left on the shelf.

She slid open the vanity drawer and lifted the blue glove box from it. Slowly, she opened the box and tears threatened to overwhelm her as she shifted through the contents.

 

The door slammed and Rhett ran up the stairs into the bedroom, his face was hard and his eyes sparked with deep anger.

“What the hell is wrong with you Scarlett? I have been looking everywhere for you. How could you be so childish and run out like that? Aside from all else, it is a damned shabby way to treat your hostess.”

Scarlett's face was as pitiful a sight as anything he had ever seen, her dress muddy and torn, her hair tangled, her cheeks pale and there she sat with that damn blue box.

“Well, are you going to answer me?” he demanded.

Scarlett looked at him, her tears still unshed but filling her sad eyes. Seeing the threatening rage in his eyes, she gathered her courage.

 

“Rhett...” her voice cracked. She took a deep breath and blinked back the tears.

In a shaky voice, she tried again, “Rhett, you once said you could stand anything from me but a lie. I am asking you for the same honesty – do you still love me?”

Rhett pulled back and his eyes lost some of their anger but the old look of shuttering returned.

“What are you talking about now, Scarlett? You seem overwrought, maybe you should rest.” he said gruffly.

“Stop it Rhett, stop treating me like a child.” Scarlett's eyes implored him. “ I asked you a question, do you still love me?”

Rhett moved towards the fire, turning his back to her.

“Have I ever loved you, my dear?”

“I know you do, or you did. I don't know when you first started to love me just as I don't know when I first loved you.”

Rhett turned and made an involuntary move towards her before stopping himself. He watched her closely, taking in the emotions on her face, how her hands were clenched together, her body tense.

Scarlett spoke quickly, frightened if she didn't take this one chance, she would lose him forever. “I know I once wondered if I loved you during the War - I used to miss you when you went away and looked forward to seeing you again but when you did return, it never took very long before you would say something mean or nasty to me and I couldn't wait to see the back of you.”

Scarlett waved her hand as if trying to brush away the memory.

“After you helped me escape Atlanta, I was so thankful to have you beside me, I felt safe and I knew nothing bad could happen as long as you were near but when you left us on the road to Tara, I thought I could never hate anyone more than you.”

A train of new thoughts and old memories combined and she spoke as if to herself -

“You must have loved me even then, why else did you stay in Atlanta?”

“Your school girl imagination has got the better of you, my dear. Don't you remember I had business in Atlanta?” Rhett scoffed.

Scarlett's eyes widened, her mind working quickly. “No, by that time you had sold your ships.”

Rhett quickly countered. “And I also told you I wanted to experience a siege. Don't flatter yourself, Scarlett – it makes your vanity too obvious.”

Scarlett looked at him, her eyes were wary, unsure if she was being vain but then with her innate instinct of men, she responded back “Why did you come back to Atlanta after the war? You could have escaped to England and never returned – you almost got yourself hung for me! And when you got out of jail, you came to me - to make sure I had the money for Tara, didn't you? All those times, you would just happen by when I was driving out to the mills, you were there, even though I was as big as a house with Ella, another man's child. All the time, you loved me.”

Rhett looked at Scarlett's face - the realizations of his true feelings for her did not make her triumphant but instead sad, as if she had lost something dear.

“I used to dream of the day I would have you in my grasp -I had a little speech all set for it, I was going to make you squirm just as you had always done with me. The torment I planned for you was going to be pure delight for me.” Scarlett reflected. “Yet on the night you proposed to me, I forgot it all, you made me feel like a young girl receiving her first proposal, tongue tied and shy and I was helpless to refuse you. After you had left, I wasn't sure if it had been real. You made it seem like a grand joke on me.

But the whole time, you did love me – you loved me when you married me and then....” Scarlett stopped. She bent her head down and Rhett had to lean forward to hear her whisper.

“I have made such a mess of things. I always thought it was Ashley ... “

Rhett stood silent, not wanting to break Scarlett's train of thought.

Scarlett's eyes welled up again as she looked at him.

“Rhett, you did love me, didn't you? Tell me you loved me, I know you did, you must have, why else have you always been there for me?”

Frightened to look at her as she would easily read his thoughts, Rhett stared down at the burning coals in the fireplace.

“Dear God in heaven, Rhett, tell me – is it too late?” Scarlett moved towards him. He could sense her quivering as she stood near him.

Still she hadn't said it, he wanted to tell her but still she hadn't said it. How could he tell her without knowing...

“Rhett, I know I have been a fool for so long but I love you – tell me you still love me.” Scarlett's fingers dug into his arm. “Please tell me it's not too late.”

Rhett turned to her, seeing her white face, her green eyes looking at him with desperation and vulnerability, her lips trembling.

He tightly grasped her shoulders. His eyes were burning black and Scarlett would have shied back but for the strength of his grip on her arms.

“Yes, Scarlett – God help me, but I love you.” He bent his head and crushed her lips in a painful kiss. They clung to one another, their bodies pressing against each other, their hand frantically grasping on as if drowning.

Magic sparked and fire ignited in the two of them. The kiss softened and swirled as they each gave love with their lips.

Rhett's hands swept through Scarlett's hair, pulling pins out to scatter to the floor. As his lips moved to her neck, a powerful heat spread throughout Scarlett's body, she lost thought of anything except his touch and her desire.

Scarlett pulled at his cravat and tore at the buttons of Rhett's shirt, crazed for the touch of his skin. She was shortly stymied with his heavy gold watch attached to his waistcoat but her nimble fingers made quick work of unhooking the chain and finally unmasked his broad chest.

Her nails scraped and dug into him as he ripped open the neckline of her gown, pushing down her camisole, his mouth nipped and licked at her breasts as his arms held her.

The few clothes that were barriers to their immediate want were quickly stripped away as a wildness swept between them.

They lowered themselves to the carpeted floor, lips held together as the two became one.

Their union was a frenzy, all the long held pent up emotions and desires created a surge of love and lust. They wanted to brand each other as true lovers do, each belonging to the other, to make their mark on the other. This was the final sealing of their covenant.

 

They lay together on the soft rug, spent, breathing deeply into each other, still joined together.

Rhett pushed himself up on his forearms, lifting some of his weight off Scarlett, and gazed down at her face.

Softly he gave his confession. “I love you, Scarlett. You were right, I have loved you for a very long time, I think from the first time I saw you.”

Scarlett, with a mixture of tears and laughter, frightened by the intensity of her emotion, whispered, “Never let me go, Rhett. I love you.”

They held on to each other, each thankful for the other.

After a time, Rhett lifted his head and gazed into the green eyes which had haunted his dreams for so many years. Scarlett proudly smiled back.

“Say it again.” Rhett murmured.

Knowing what he wanted, Scarlett debated for a second.

“Say what?”

Scarlett wanted to tease him but looking into his eyes, she knew now was not the time for it. He needed to hear her, hear the truth.

“I love you, Rhett. Never in my life have I felt the love I feel for you.” she said with pure honesty.

A change came over Rhett as if a tightly bound rope had broken and it brought a relaxation of tension, taking away some of the harsh lines and sharp angles of Rhett's face, making him even more handsome.

With exquisite tenderness, Rhett kissed Scarlett, giving thanks to God and to her for the happiness that filled him.

He stood and pulled up his silk drawers, tightening the strings at his lower back. He then lifted Scarlett by her hands. The floor was littered with their torn and rumpled clothing and they both began to laugh.

“I suppose I'll need to buy you a new dress.” Rhett said.

“Yes, I suppose you will, but I'm worth it.”

“That you are, my love, that you are.”

“Am I worth three hundred dollars?”

There was a uncomfortable pause as they both returned to that day in the cold, damp jail. How things might have been different if Rhett had taken Scarlett up on her offer, if Scarlett had been honest with Rhett from the start, if she had worn gloves.

Rhett encompassed Scarlett in his arms, feeling the lingering resentment in her body. He knew if he was to have any chance at happiness with Scarlett, he too had to show his vulnerability.

“You are worth everything in the world to me. You are the light, the dark, the joy and the sorrow of my life. I have many apologies to make to you and I think, my darling wife, you may have one or two of your own to make to me.. .”

Scarlett's cheek was pressed against his firm chest, she could feel the steady beating of his heart.

“But Scarlett, there is no hope for happiness between us if we spend our lives reliving past hurts. It would be trite of me to say, 'Forgive me for all my past mistakes' but we must be able to accept things from the past are now past. We can speak of them to explain our reasons but once done, they must be over. There is no hope for us if we can't, do you agree?”

“I do.” Scarlett tightly squeezed Rhett. They held each other, each fitting perfectly in to the other.

Then Scarlett said, “Can I ask one question right now?”

Rhett arms tightened around her. Though he spoke of honesty, he didn't know how difficult it would be to be totally truthful with her.

“Of course, my love.”

Scarlett was nervous to ask as she feared the answer but she forced herself on - better to know the truth and face it than imagine the worst.

“When I found you in the hallway, with...” The vision of Rhett with Virginia pressing herself against him raised Scarlett's jealousy again. “What did you whisper to that creature that made her cackle so?”

Rhett smiled. “I said,” He bent his head to Scarlett's ear and whispered, “There is the woman I love and if you're not careful, she will kill you for being so close to me, Virginia. She is a very good shot.”

“Shooting's too good for her, I think I would prefer something more lasting.” Scarlett said, “A good dose of lice mixed with scabies and ringworm would be more to my taste.”

Rhett grinned, “All curable though, unlike gunshot.”

“Sadly, true.” Scarlett looked at him. “One more question about Ginny...”

Rhett smile faded. “Scarlett....”

“It will be the last, I promise. She knew about your scar - how?”  
“I am ashamed to admit but when I was younger and not as discerning in my taste, I met Virginia. Do I need to go on?”

Scarlett shook her head, “I think I'd prefer if you didn't.”

“If it makes anything better, it was before I met you.”

Scarlett squeezed Rhett again, “It does. Now I will never mention her again, unless you have more gossip on her than what Athena already told me.”

“A gentleman never tells.”

“Perfect, that means you will tell me everything.”

They both laughed and then kissed.

The small clock on the mantle chimed the half hour.

“Though I would like nothing more than to kiss you for hours, we need to think about getting dressed for the opera.” Rhett said as he gazed down at Scarlett's dreamy eyes. He lightly kissed her cheek and stepped away from her.

“I must look like a sight.” Scarlett said as she pushed at her dishevelled hair.

Rhett looked at her standing in her short ribbon-trimmed pantalettes that were twisted about, her silk stockings pushed down, her breasts still peeking over the top of her corset where he had pulled her camisole back. “ You look beautiful. More beautiful than Venus herself.” Again Rhett took her in his arms and kissed her deeply. Her tongue darted between his lips and her hands roamed over his back to the strings.

With a groan he pulled away. “Scarlett you are making me forget all sense of time. Go bathe and I'll ring for Alice.”  
Scarlett pouted, not wanting to leave his arms. “Alright, if I have to.” She sighed and stepped toward the washing room before stopping.

“But Rhett...” Scarlett blushed. “Hide my dress, I don't know how I could possibly explain tearing it like that.”

“Don't worry, I will hide the evidence of your dress ” Rhett's black eyes sparkled. “and my shirt.” He indicated the tears along the front of his shirt where Scarlett had yanked the buttons off.

Scarlett gasped and then grinned. “Oh you.”

“Scarlett...”

“Yes?”

“Say it again.”

Knowing exactly what he wanted, Scarlett said without hesitation “I love you, Rhett, and always will.”

“I'll never get tired of hearing you say it.” Rhett grinned broadly. He patted her bottom, “Now scoot.”

Scarlett went into the washroom and shortly after Rhett heard the sound of water filling the bathtub as he picked up their discarded clothing.

He bundled the dress and his shirt into the back corner of the wardrobe and hung his rumpled suit.

Finally, he picked up the scattered hair pins and took them to the vanity. The blue satin box lay on top, mocking him as he stared at it. Would it hurt him to see what lay inside?

He tentatively touched the top of the box, as though fearing an adder would strike out to poison the happiness he felt. He lifted the lid and looked within.

On top lay three dried rose buds, wrapped in a strip of lace. Rhett gently shifted them aside. Under them lay a packet of letters bound with a thin blue ribbon - he read the address of the uppermost envelope

**To The Proprietor**

**Kennedy General Store**

**Five Corners,**

**Atlanta, Georgia**

Rhett flipped through the envelopes, they were stamped from Britain, France and the last one was a telegram from Charleston. His letters - he had written them during their engagement. He hadn't wanted to blacken her reputation any more by writing to her at Miss Pitty's so he had mailed them to her at the store as if she was a business associate.

He never expected Scarlett to be so sentimental. They weren't love letters, rather he had written of his travels, some of his business dealings, descriptions of people he had met and places he had visited. The wire had told her his return date to Atlanta.

Scarlett's replies had been written in much the same vein as his. She would write about problems with her businesses, complaints of workers and slow paying customers, some news of Atlanta and much about Tara. She also gave no words of love or of longing. They both signed off with Sincerely Yours.

Why did she hold these letters so dearly, Rhett wondered. What had she read in them that had made them so special to her?

He heard the gurgle of water as Scarlett pulled the bath's plug and quickly returned the envelopes to the box, set the delicate rose buds back on top and closed the lid.

He pushed the bell on the wall to call for Alice.

“Rhett, what should I wear tonight, I've never been to an opera before.” Scarlett said, returning back into the bedroom, wrapped in her robe, her skin pink and her hair curling in small tendrils by her face. Rhett looked at her, wanting to take her again but stopping himself - it would have to wait.

“Why you're not dressed yet!”

For Rhett was still standing in only his drawers. Scarlett admired his broad shoulders and his slim waist. She craved to touch his chest and curl her fingers within it's black hair.

“I was waiting to shave before I dressed.” Rhett said. “Wear the bronze dress, the one you wore on the ship.”

Scarlett looked surprised. “I didn't think you liked that one on me.”

“I prefer it off you but I think I could say that about any one of your dresses.” Rhett smirked and Scarlett giggled. “Wear it tonight. I want every man to be, as you often say 'pea green with envy' when they see the beautiful woman I was lucky enough to make my wife.”

They moved together, forgetting the time, the opera, thinking only of each other.

The door downstairs shut closed - “Mrs. Butler..” Alice called. “I'm here, should I come up and help you dress?”

Scarlett and Rhett pulled apart, frustrated in their desire. Rhett pressed his finger against Scarlett's lips and indicated the wardrobe and then the washroom.

“One minute, Alice.” Scarlett called back.

Rhett quickly opened the wardrobe and gathered his clothing before going to the washroom.

“Yes, Alice, you can come up now.” Scarlett laughed at Rhett's scrambling.

“I've brought some sandwiches for Captain Butler and yourself, ma'am.”Alice said. “Would you like me to bring them up or should I lay the table?”

Scarlett realized how ravenous she was, she hadn't eaten anything since her small breakfast was interrupted this morning when Rosa had come begging for her to help Rex get down the tree. Was that only this morning? It seemed so long ago.

“Bring up mine, Captain Butler will be downstairs in a minute.”

Alice was dressing Scarlett's hair as she sat gobbling down the chicken sandwiches on the tray when Rhett came out of the washing room, dressed in his perfectly tailored black swallow tail suit, crisp white shirt with the mother of pearl studs and links and a black silk cravat.

“My, you scrub up well.” Scarlett smiled.

“Thank you. It wouldn't do if the escort of the most beautiful woman in San Francisco didn't try to look his best.”

Alice giggled. “I'm almost done Mrs. Butler's hair, Captain Butler. Your sandwiches are on a tray in the dining room.”

“I imagine that is my cue to leave you to perform your magic on my wife, Alice.”

Alice laughed again, “No magic needed when a lady is as pretty as Mrs. Butler.”

“I agree. Why do I bother buying her gowns when a potato sack would do?”

“ Just for that, I am going shopping tomorrow for two new dresses.” Scarlett said. “Now away with you or I'll never get ready.”

 

 

 

The theatre was swirling with ladies dressed in their finest - ermine lined opera capes, diamonds and pearls, silks and satins, thick velvets and Venetian lace, tiaras and corsages. Gentlemen were in their uniforms of black and white evening dress, some with a splash of red on their capes or boutonnieres of carnations.

Once again, Scarlett was the belle of the night. None of the women could hold a candle to her but it was more than her gown which poured over her figure, more than the jewels she wore, the diamond bracelet wrapped around her black suede opera gloves, the filigree and diamond encrusted necklace and the hair combs Rhett had bought her in New Orleans. Her lips were red from Rhett's kisses and her cheeks pinked with a blush of a woman in love. The other women looked with jealousy and the men were just as envious towards Rhett.

A few of the women Athena had introduced her to at the tea came over to shake Scarlett's hand and invite her to call or to go shopping some day. The Missus Fairall and Huggins hadn't been reticent of telling the other ladies about Scarlett's meeting with Lady Randolph and Scarlett's fame had grown with each retelling, for anyone who had bested the pariah all of San Francisco hated was truly a lady one should know.

As Scarlett stood chatting with Athena and Grace in the cloak room, removing their wraps and washing their hands, Virginia Randolph pushed past them, rudely calling for the maid to attend to her.

“Your hair combs are so pretty, Scarlett. Where did you get them?” Athena spoke clearly.

“Rhett bought them for me at the beginning of our honeymoon in New Orleans.”

“Beautiful. The diamonds sparkle so – one can always tell real diamonds from paste, don't you think?” Athena indicated the glittering collar around Virginia's scrawny neck.

She moved closer to Scarlett, “All the real jewels were sold years ago, the poor thing.”

she said with a touch of sarcasm. “Shall we join our husbands, ladies. You never know what they will get up to when they are left to their own devices.”

The head usher was knocking his tall, gilded staff three times, indicating the performance was about to begin and the younger ushers were guiding the audience to their seats.

Grace, Athena and Scarlett walked up the marble stairs followed by their husbands and made their way to the box seats.

Rhett seated Scarlett and gave her the program then moved his chair closer to hers as the gaslights of the gilt and plaster theatre slowly dimmed. The audience applauded the conductor as he stepped up onto his podium in the orchestra pit and with a flourish, he bowed and raised his baton. The garishly painted fire curtain decorated with a Spanish lady in a low slung blouse advertising Cuban cigars rose up and the red velvet curtains slowly swept back as the orchestra began playing the opening notes.

Rhett touched Scarlett's hand and she pressed hers back. They began a dance of hands, touching, and stroking. Rhett caressed her inner wrist where her gloves opened below the joining of the black pearl buttons, he felt her pulse beating strongly. A quiver started low in Scarlett's belly, rising up to fill her, sending warmth through her and making her breathless.

The singers moved about the stage, the music rose and fell but Scarlett and Rhett were immune to the spectacular, lost in themselves.

The audience applauded as the house lights rose. Scarlett fanned herself, her cheeks were flushed.

“Hell of a show, don't you think Rhett?” Hank said. “Rhett?”

Grace patted Hank's hand, smiling at him, distracting him from interrupting Rhett and Scarlett who seemed to be in another world.

Stephen stood up, “Shall we get a glass of wine during intermission.”

“What a perfect idea, Stephen. Have I ever told you how you always seem to read my mind at the best times?” Athena said, holding her hand up to him, still flirting with her husband of thirty odd years.

The three couples made their way to the upper lobby and were served champagne by one of the passing waiters.

Scarlett noticed Virginia standing beside a short, red faced man leaning on a cane, he looked as if he was suffering from gout and from the way he was guzzling down his wine, Scarlett could see why. Virginia was searching the crowd, looking for a friendly face or a new conquest. Scarlett saw her spy Rhett, her powdered face crackled as she provocatively smiled and lifted her glass in a toast.

Rhett whispered in Scarlett's ear. “May I kiss you, my love?”

“Why Captain Butler, how forward of you! But I think it would be most acceptable if you did.” Scarlett said. Her eyes twinkled up at him. “And I would be most angry if you didn't.”

“We can't have that, though your eyes are at their most beautiful when you are angry.”

Society was shocked but more from envy than from impropriety as they saw Rhett kiss Scarlett deeply. Wives wished their husbands were as romantic and husbands wished their wives or at the least, their mistresses would still want such kisses.

Virginia, her face mottled with anger, slammed down her glass, shattering it on the round marble table and loudly demanded Pinkie to follow her back to their seats saying as she passed “I am not surprised by such behaviour in this back water town. Oh to be back in England.”

More than few twitters of laughter followed as everyone knew that Lord and Lady Randolph would be living in Fleet Prison if they ever set foot back in England.

The lights dimmed as the second act of the opera began and a few couples sat closer to each other, more hands were held and more than a few hopes were raised for the end of the night's entertainment.

Rhett whispered to Scarlett, explaining the opera to her. Scarlett began to giggle behind her fan at the thought than any man would go to such lengths for such a woman as the lead singer – why she was as big as Mammy and had a nose like a hog! When Scarlett pointed this out to Rhett, he too began to laugh then scolded Scarlett for having no artistic feelings. He then tried to make her laugh by asking if the tenor's toupee was tilting to the left or was it the right and pondering on the kind of corset a tenor would wear compared to one used by a baritone.

After the final curtain calls, many of the audience members moved to the upper floor refreshment room which had been transformed into a dining room for a banquet for the supporters of the San Francisco Opera Society. It was catered by the Poodle Dog Restaurant, famous to all in San Francisco for their French food and infamous to many of the gentleman for their private dining rooms where assignations with mistresses and young innocent girls could be enjoyed without any hint of scandal.

Lord and Lady Randolph tried to enter but the maitre 'd shook his head, - with a shrug of his shoulders he explained their names were not on the seating chart.

Virginia tried arguing with him, demanding entry, “Do you not know who we are? You have obviously made a mistake, you silly little man!”

Lightly swiping his glorious moustache, the Gaelic man shrugged again. “No madame, I have made no mistake. Perhaps Madame is the mistaken one. Madame should have made a more generous contribution to the San Francisco Opera Society if she desired entree to the banquet. Pardon Madame, there are guests waiting to be seated. Please move aside.”

“Problem Ginny, aren't we going to be fed?” Lord Randolph said. “I was wanting a bit of nosh. Pity.”

Virginia face looked like thunder as she whirled away from her husband and stormed off with him meekly following her.

“Where to now, my dear?” Lord Randolph whined as he limped along behind his wife. “I'm very hungry.”

 

A long, linen covered table was lit with towering gilt epergnes, their crystal bowls filled with heady scented gardenias and draped with streaming ivy. Multitudes of gold forks, knives, spoons for the many courses lay at each place setting, along with four different wine glasses. As was customary, spouses were not seated together and Scarlett was sitted between Stephen and another gentleman, Mr. John Parry, a spry, elderly Irish man who had made his fortune in land speculation. Both men were delighted with their dinner companion and vied to entertain Scarlett.

Rhett was lower down the table on the opposite side from Scarlett. She was pleased to see Mrs. Fairall sat on his left with Athena on his right and not some of the younger, prettier women who were seated at the long table.

Waiters filled the dinner guests glasses with champagne and a tall, thin man with elegant silver mutton chops and swept back hair stood at the head of the table, tapping his glass for quiet in the room so he may make a toast.

“Ladies, Gentleman, Patrons and Sponsors - I bid you to raise your glasses! Let us toast to a successful opening for this years season for our beloved opera. It is because of you and our original benefactress, Mrs. Dolly Preston, our fair city can hold claim to be one of the world's premiere cities for opera.”

The company sipped from their glasses and more than a few called out heartily, “ Here Here!”

“We give thanks to Mrs. Grace Mansfield for continuing her mother's legacy.”

Again the company drank and the calls grew louder with thanks to Grace.

“And finally we give thanks to Herr Sentz, conductor of our fine orchestra, to Prima Donna Madame Cavel and Prima Uomo Senor Pietrarioia, for their exquisite voices in tonight's production.”

The assembly raised their glasses and drank as the conductor and singers stood to take their bows.

“And finally, I call upon you to toast Senor Donizetti and his masterful work - “ _L'elisir d'amore_ ”. Though only in great opera could true love and grand passion be so difficult to achieve, it is the stuff of entertainment!”

As the ensemble toasted once again, Scarlett glanced over at Rhett, who gave her a wink, each grinned, knowing their story must be one of great opera.

“ To love and laughter for ever after!” the thin gentleman said with a theatrical flourish.

The guests echoed back “To love and laughter!”

The sound of conversation grew lively as musicians in the corner of the room began to play arias from some of the classic operas and a troop of waiters stepped forward to serve the opening courses.

 

Mr. Parry, on Scarlett's right, had grey wiry hair and small bright blue eyes - he tugged at his tight collar, seeming uncomfortable in his evening clothes.

Sherried consomme began the meal and Mr. Parry gulped his small bowl down quickly.

“Not much of a soup. Tastes more like the water my Mam used to boil our socks in back in County Meath.” he groused with a heavy brogue, that forty years in America hadn't softened.

“Why my Pa was from County Meath, Mr. Parry.” Scarlett said.

“Was he, Miss. And his name?”

“Gerald O'Hara.”

“Ah, you are an O'Hara are ye? Well, let me raise my glass to ye. They were a fine family, though the men all had to leave County Meath. Your Gran stayed on, as feisty as any young lass till the end. The O'Haras are still toasted each La Caille and fondly remembered by the old uns. Tell me, is he still with us?”

Scarlett shook her head, “ Sadly no, but he died like an Irish man, fighting for his land.”

Mr. Parry laughed. “That's an O'Hara for you. Land meant more to them than the air they breathed. My condolences to ye, Miss. I raise my glass to him and to you.” Mr. Parry drank down his champagne. “Faith, I ne'er taken to this bubble water. A man needs whiskey to properly toast a fallen soldier. Here, you” Mr. Parry called to a waiter, “Get me some whiskey, proper whiskey, none of that horse piss bourbon.”

Scarlett laughed, Mr. Parry keenly reminded her of Pa. She wished he was still here and knew she was finally happy.

Rhett gazed over at Scarlett, seeing her smile, her dimples deepen as she spoke with the elderly man on her right.

He laughed out loud when he saw Scarlett's face as the second course was served - Oysters Mignonette in the half shell, on a bed of ice. People elegantly lifted the shells and slurped the seafood down as they chatted to one another. Scarlett turned to Mr. Parry and with as deft a hand as any card shark, and eyes that could dazzle any man, Scarlett managed to pass three of her oysters on to his plate.

Plump squab cooked in champagne with vegetables came next and as this was only a light supper, dessert of individual Charlotte Russe completed the meal.

As coffee was served, people began to mill about, chatting to other diners and Rhett moved to Scarlett's side.

“Did you enjoy your meal, Scarlett?”

“It was delicious. Did you?”

“Yes, I specially enjoyed the seafood.”

Rhett whispered in Scarlett's ear, “You know, oysters are said to be aphrodisiacs.”

“Is that something French?”

Rhett threw back his head and laughed loudly. “You could say so, my love.”

 

The fog had lifted and a thin moon with scattered stars shone above as they stepped onto the porch of the guest house - Rhett pulled Scarlett into his arms.

“I have been wanting to kiss you for the past hour.” he murmured.

She tilted her eyes up at him and said, “Well, what are you waiting for?”

Rhett bent his head and gently kissed her lips leaving Scarlett slightly disappointed.

Rhett looked at Scarlett's pouting mouth and chuckled, “All in good time, my love.” Releasing her, he opened the door and ushered her inside to the warmth of the small cottage.

“Do you need to ring for Jane?”

“No, I told her I wouldn't need her tonight.”

“Shall I be your lady's maid? I have very deft fingers.”

“Considering what you did to my tea dress earlier, I don't think I will chance it.”

Rhett and Scarlett laughed and then they kissed, this time it was much more to Scarlett's liking.

“If you value your dress, I suggest you move along. I won't be held responsible otherwise.” Rhett said.

Scarlett smiled, her eyes slanting sensuously up at him. “Give me ten minutes.”

“I'll be watching the clock.” he said.

Scarlett walked up the stairs as Rhett watched her tantalizing hips swaying. He gave her a few minutes and then followed her up and prepared himself.

Scarlett's ten minutes became twenty and Rhett stood waiting for her, listening to the wind blowing through the trees outside and gusting against the windows - he was anxious and excited. He turned the lights down but the room was still lit with a dim rosy glow.

When Scarlett finally came out of the bathing room, her long black hair was flowing loose down her back and with the light shining behind her, her slim figure was clearly visible through the diaphanous lawn nightgown. Rhett breathed in deeply.

Scarlett stood shyly, not sure what she should do but Rhett, standing before the coal fire in his deep red paisley dressing robe, held open his arms and she rushed to them.

Their kiss began as if with a vow of devotion, gently and loving. It soon intensified and they drank deeply of each other.

Rhett's lips moved along Scarlett's jaw and behind her ear as she stretched out her neck to give him better access. Down her neck his mouth moved as his fingers slipped the thin straps of her nightgown off her shoulders, the gown sliding down to the floor. His fingers smoothly ran up her body, sending shivers up her spine.

Scarlett moaned softly as she held tightly to him, her breath was quick.

Rhett lifted her into his arms and carried her to the bed - laying her down, he stood back and gazed at her.

Scarlett felt bashful, laying there bare as the day she was born and she tried to cover her nakedness. “Shouldn't we turn the lights out?” she said.

“Don't Scarlett. Let me look at you.” Rhett whispered. “You are so beautiful.”

His tone banished Scarlett's shyness and she stretched herself before him, seeing how his black eyes were lit with desire.

Rhett drank in the sight of her. Her black hair had fanned out around her, highlighting the pearl of her skin and as she lifted her arms to the pillows behind her head, her full breasts with their large nipples raised up, they had the softness of a woman not a girl. Her waist was still tiny even after bearing two children and her belly gently rounded. The upward curve of her hips slid down to her thighs. laying modestly across one another. Her legs were perfectly shaped, plump at the thigh and tapering down to neat ankles and tiny feet. She could have stepped off a canvas painted by Bougureau. 

“I want to make love to you, Scarlett. Are you willing?” Rhett growled.

Her eyes were heavy lidded, bedroom eyed and she held up her arms to him.

Rhett shrugged off his robe and Scarlett greedily looked at the sight of his broad shoulders angling down to his waist and his slim hips.

He kneeled at the foot of the bed and stroked her leg, from her round thigh down to her foot. He held the tiny foot in his hands and massaged her high instep. Scarlett arched up as her nerves sent new messages to her brain. She sighed and whispered his name.

Rhett's finger seductively stroked between her toes, shooting an electricity up her legs.

“Oh Rhett, please...” she gasped.

He then pressed his chest against her foot and Scarlett's toes rubbed against his chest and twined within the hair.

Rhett began to stroke her leg slowly, his fingers reached her knee and he tickled the softness at the back of it, making her squirm even more. Her legs parted as he began kissing her inner thigh - soft, butterfly kisses. Barely touching her but making her body alight with want.

Rhett kneeled between her legs and he slid his hands down Scarlett from her neck to her belly, his fingers feathered her breasts and her nipples, playing with one before moving to the other. Scarlett arched higher and wrapped her legs around Rhett's hips.

“Rhett...” she whispered, his tip grazed over her, silkily touching her but still he held back.

“Slowly, darling. Not yet.”

Rhett kissed her, his tongue darted between her lips, sending her desire to higher peaks and making her want to scream in frustration as his hands moved from one part of her body to another, never staying long but heightening her desire with each touch.

She held tightly to him, trying to push herself against him but he still held back.

“I love you, Scarlett.” he murmured in her ear. “ Do you love me?”

“Oh God Rhett yes. I love you, I love only you.”

 

With that, Rhett slid into her slowly, eliciting a deep groan of satisfaction from Scarlett. He waited a minute and then gradually drew back and then once again, with infinite gentleness, entered her.

They began their dance of love, quickening the steps and with each touch, each kiss, each sigh, they grew closer.

Scarlett's legs wrapped around Rhett's hips, pulling him deeper within her and he held her tightly, he lifted her leg higher, touching her in secret places, sending her into a delirium of unknown feelings.

Scarlett felt a rush and she gasped. Holding Rhett tightly to her, another rush came and she cried out.

Rhett trembled as he groaned out her name.

                                                                               ***********

Scarlett woke as the wind rattled against the windows. She was still cocooned in Rhett's arms, her hair wrapped around him, their legs entwined.

She smiled feeling what real love was, to love and be loved. Why had it taken her so long to realize how much she loved him?

He hadn't made it easy for her.

 

“ _God help the man who ever really loves you. You'd break his heart, my darling, cruel, destructive little cat who is so careless and confident she doesn't even trouble to sheathe her claws.”*_

 

She hadn't made it easy for him though. And she didn't want to break his heart, not now she knew she had it. Never – her claws would be sheathed forever and from now on she would only purr for him.

Scarlett looked at Rhett. She outlined his proud profile with a gentle touch, stroking her finger from his proud forehead, down his straight nose to his mouth, over his full lips to his firm chin and finally down his neck. Her hand slid over his broad shoulder, feeling the muscles of his arms and his smooth skin. She breathed in deeply, smelling his scent. Her lips sensuously smiled and she arched against him, pressing her body against his.

Her fingers moved to his chest, outlining his nipple with the tip of her nail and lightly brushing against the hair of his chest. Her hand followed the dark line of hair to his belly button and circled it.

She grew bolder and moved further down his abdomen, running her fingernail along the scar that Ginny dared speak of – Scarlett kissed it, feeling the puckered skin against her lips. Brushing against Rhett's groin, Scarlett felt his excitement. She looked up at him but his eyes were still closed in sleep.

Would he know if she...?

She tentatively touched him and he seemed to respond, growing more erect. She gently stroked him and he grew harder.

Scarlett boldness grew as did her own excitement. She rubbed her leg against his, the softness of her thigh against the heavy saddle muscles of his. She shivered with want of him and her desire led her on. Slowly, Scarlett rose up and straddled Rhett, - she lowered herself on him, letting out a soft groan. Rhett's hands moved to her hips and he gently lifted her and then let her down again. Scarlett followed his rhythm and she began to move up to his very tip and then slowly back down with another deep groan.

One of Rhett's hands slipped smoothly from her hip to her breast and began rubbing her nipple, twisting it and lightly pinching it. Their rhythm quickened and Scarlett pressed his hand against her breast as she panted and let out soft cries.

Rhett's other hand moved between her legs and his finger stroked her, Scarlett's cries became louder as she pressed up and down faster, until the delicious rush came again. Rhett tightened his grip on her hip and with a deep sigh he too released.

Scarlett felt the throbbing between herself and Rhett and she stretched up her arms and threw back her hair. Her eyes were closed and her lips smiled in deep satisfaction as she sat astride Rhett.

Rhett softly stroked her bottom and he said, “Why Mrs. Butler, how forward of you, waking a man from his sleep.”

Scarlett smiled down at him and then coming out of her reverie, she gasped, a look of horror on her face.

“Oh- oh no!” Scarlett climbed off Rhett and pulled away. She curled up in a ball with her back to him and began crying, her sobs convulsing her body.

“Scarlett – Scarlett, what is wrong?” Rhett said as he put his arm around her.

Scarlett tried to hide her face in the pillow. He could barely hear her words.

“I did it again, oh what you must think of me...”

Rhett was terribly confused. “You did what again, honey?”

“You know, what we just did, what I did ...ohh.”

“You did what? You made love to your husband. It is allowed, you know. Even the Church allows it.”

Scarlett's sobs became louder and she gulped, “Not, it's – oh it's just like what I did that night, that night in New Orleans.”

Rhett by now was fully confused. “What night, darling?”

“Th, th, the night when I.. and then you left because you were disgusted with me, with what I had done, that I wasn't a lady... and oh, I did it again. I'm not a lady and you hate me.”

“That isn't why I left that night.” Rhett stroking her arm.

“Then why did you?” Scarlett hiccuped.

“It was because of your sigh.” Rhett realized immediately how foolish he sounded. He had never said it out loud, he had only thought it, despaired over it, hated it for what it had meant.

Scarlett turned over and looked up at Rhett. “My sigh? What do you mean?”

“We had just made love and you seemed to be happy, with me, with our marriage. I thought we were closer than we had ever been. As I held you, I could sense how your mind wasn't there with me and then you sighed with such longing...” he shrugged.

 

Scarlett tried to remember back – she had been thinking of things other than Rhett.

“You're right – my mind was somewhere else.”

“You were thinking of Ashley.” Rhett said baldly, hoping she would tell him no.

“Yes, partly.” Scarlett said truthfully.

With a look of disgust, Rhett flung back the bed clothes and pulled on his robe,

“How charming, Scarlett – lying in the arms of your husband as you sigh over the man you love. Maybe you should take some tips from Lady Virginia – she at least knows how to keep her lovers straight.”

Scarlett herself threw back the sheet and stormed over to Rhett, naked and angry - it was a potent combination for Rhett.

Scarlett slapped his face hard, feeling the burning sting in her hand.

“Don't you ever compare to someone like her. How dare you!” Scarlet raised her hand to slap him again but Rhett grabbed hold of her arms.

He stood over her, his anger at a white heat and was about to point out the similarities she shared with Virginia, to remind Scarlett of her offer in the jail, her marriage for old Frank's money and her bargain with him when all the while she had still mooned over a married man.

But something, he never would know what it was - Fate possibly, stayed the vicious words and his perspicacity trounced his jealousy. She had said she had never loved anyone as she loved him, she had shown her love and he believed it. Was he going to throw it away, all he had ever hoped for, dreamed of for how many years if there was a chance, no matter how slim, that she did love him and not Ashley.....

He pulled Scarlett into his arms and held her tightly, waiting for her to cool down.

“I'm sorry, Scarlett. I am truly sorry. That was uncalled for and I don't blame you for being angry. Old habits seem to die hard.” He stroked her back and continued. “You are nothing like her. You are a lady for one thing.”

Scarlett pushed back from Rhett so she could see his face, he smiled down at her, the left side of his face was red with the print of her hand.

“You think I'm a lady?”

“I do – not a lady of the Mrs. Merriweather or Mrs. Mead, the ones who follow outdated Codes and ridiculous rules of social behaviour. No, you are a lady like Mrs. Masterson and Mrs. Tremont, one who follows your own path and tells anyone who doesn't like it to go to Hell. You are a grand lady.”

A glimpse of a smile flickered over Scarlett's lips. He had said the right thing and at the right time. And he meant what he said, she was a lady – a lady of his own.

A heavy gust of wind blew hard, rattling the windows and Scarlett shivered.

“Come darling, get back into bed.”

Rhett led the way and Scarlett lay down, pulling the rumpled bed clothes around her.

“Are you coming back to bed?” Scarlett whispered.

“If you will allow me.” Rhett answered.

Rhett turned down the lamps leaving only the coal fire glowing to light the room. He collected his cigar and match case and then slipped into the bed.

Scarlett moved closer to him, laying her head on his chest and he wrapped his arm around her.

Rhett puffed on his cigar as they lay quietly together.

Scarlett broke the silence. “I'm sorry I slapped you.”

“I deserved it. I never knew you had so much strength – it must have been all those years of picking cotton.”

“Don't joke about it, it's something I prefer to forget.”

They lay silently again. Rhett stubbed out his cigar and pulled Scarlett closer.

“Should I tell you why I sighed that night?” Scarlett asked.

“I admit knowing the truth would help me to understand.”

Scarlett snuggled in against Rhett and quietly began, “I was happy, so very happy and I began to think how nothing in my life had gone the way I had expected. I started to remember back, something I had sworn I would never do because I knew it would hurt too much but memories of happy times, of barbeques and parties, of Christmas and fish fries, of Tara growing green with cotton and Pa galloping up on his white stallion, forced themselves into my mind. I remembered those I had loved in my life, Mother, darling Pa, my beaux – all dead because of the damn war. Or if they weren't dead they were destroyed by it.”

Rhett held her closer to him.

“I then started to think how much I had changed since then. I am not who I was or who I always wanted to be.”

“Who was that?”  
Scarlett's throat tightened. “I always thought when I grew up, I would be like my Mother. She was always so kind, gentle and soft spoken, polite to everyone and patient no matter how people must have tried her. I never could be like her, I always took after Pa.

Then I thought how Mother must be so very disappointed in me, what I had become. I wasn't her little girl anymore.”

Rhett stroked Scarlett's hair and softly said, “I think your Mother would have understood what you did and why you did it. She may have been sad her little girl had to go through all you did but I'm sure she would have been proud her daughter was strong enough to hold off the Yankees and save her home and her family.”

“Thank you, Rhett. That makes me feel better.”

“But you told me you were thinking about Ashley.”

“Oh Ashley,” Scarlett said dismissively, “He was part of it all, of my childhood. He was as much a part of it as the Tarletons or the Fontaines or my favourite pony.”

“Then you weren't thinking how much you would have preferred to be held in Ashley's arms rather than mine?”

“No. Oh Rhett, is that what you thought? ”

“Are you surprised? Since I first meant you, you have led me to believe Ashley was the one you loved and you would move heaven and earth to make him yours or die trying.”

“Did I really seem that way? Scarlett said. “I guess I did but Rhett, I didn't really love him.”

“You must be an incredible actress then, my dear, for you gave ever indication you did.”

“I didn't, not really, but I didn't realize it until the day at the Woodward Gardens.”

“What made you realize it then?”

“Going to the art gallery.” Scarlett said.

“What do you mean, was there a painting there?”  
“No, just having to go to the art gallery. Oh Rhett, do I really have to detail it all? Let me just say I realized the real Ashley was not the dream prince I had built castles in the sky upon. Then I realized something Pa told me long ago was true - and before you ask me what he said, I'll tell you. He said _“Only when like marries like can there be any happiness.”*_ And we are like – why even Mammy said we were two mules dressed as horses.”

“A wiser woman than your Mammy has yet to be born.”

“Well I don't know if I like to be compared to a mule but you said yourself we are alike. 'renegades and selfish rascals' you said. I like that better.”

She lifted her head to look at Rhett's eyes. “ But Rhett, you must stop this business about Ashley. I love you not him. I never loved him like I love you but I can't spend my life trying to convince you, or being questioned and not trusted.”

“It is hard for me to believe you really love me, that something I have wanted for so long has come true.”

“Well, Captain Butler, get used to it because I plan on loving you until the day I die.”

“If you keep telling me, it will eventually sink in, I am sure.”

“I love you Rhett.”

“I love you too, Scarlett.”

They kissed softly and with a sigh, Scarlett lay her head back on Rhett's chest.

She whispered, “That sigh was one of happy contentment – in case you were wondering.”

Rhett chuckled.

The day had been a long one for the two of them and very soon, both were peacefully asleep, wrapped in each others arms.

 

                                                                               *******************

Rhett groaned with pleasure and turned over in bed, reaching for Scarlett. The sheet was cool and she wasn't there beside him.

He sat up, the light in room was much brighter than usual and he squinted his eyes at the little mantle clock – it read eight ten - he couldn't remember the last time he had slept so late. The aroma of brewing coffee twitched at his nose as he got up from the bed.

The bathroom door was ajar but still he politely knocked, not wanting to disturb Scarlett. There was no answer and walking in, Rhett found there was no Scarlett.

Rhett did his morning routine, shaved and then dressed, grinning broadly all the while.

Downstairs he could hear Jane in the kitchen but he had no idea what had happened to Scarlett. The scent of bacon frying floated up stairs and Rhett's stomach growled with hunger.

Descending the stairs, Rhett still saw no sign of Scarlett and he stepped towards the kitchen. As he neared the door he heard a familiar voice singing an old campfire song -

“Oh capture the hearts of the fair,

No matter what may be your age

You always may cut a fine dash

You will suit all the girls to a hair

If you've only got a moustache!

A moustache, a moustache...”

He silently pushed open the door and saw Scarlett standing before the stove, lifting out rashers of bacon on to a plate. Her hair was tied in a loose ponytail which fell down her back and she was simply dressed in a light wool gown of lilac - she had an animation about her that Rhett hadn't seen since the early days of the war.

“Brava!” Rhett clapped his hands.

“Oh!” Scarlett jumped, burning her finger on the hot frying pan.

She yelped and Rhett quickly took her hand and slathered the burnt finger with butter from the block sitting on the table.

“Damn Rhett, you scared me half to death. You walk as quietly as an Indian – I think I should put bells on you just to know when you are near. And why are you up? I wanted to surprise you with breakfast in bed!”

“I'm sorry – I woke up and there was no one beside me. Would you believe me if I told you I got lonely?”

“No but I will forgive you. Go in the dining room and I will bring you your breakfast, it's almost ready. ”

“Anything I can do to help?”

“No, just take the coffee tray in, will you?”

Rhett did as he was asked and poured himself a cup, the coffee was strong, just as he liked it.

Scarlett came in carrying another tray with a large plate of bacon and eggs, chipped potatoes, toast and jam.

“There you are. Eat hearty, m'laddie.”

“Where's your plate?”

“I'm fine – I don't want to get fat like the Cuban ladies, otherwise you might divorce me.” Scarlett teased.

“I don't think you will ever let that happen, honey.”

“I don't think you will let me let it happen.”

“A feast fit for a king! I never knew you could not only be as beautiful as you are

but you cook too! Should I look forward to this every morning? ”

“Oh no.” Scarlett said. “ Only high days and holidays will you find me in the kitchen and possibly when you specially please me.”

“Hmm, well as it isn't a holiday and not being Catholic, I'm not sure if it's a high day but I'm guessing you are specially pleased with me this morning.”

Scarlett leaned forward and kissed Rhett. “Yes, I am very pleased with you this morning.”

Rhett began his breakfast and noticed how Scarlett kept sneaking pieces of bacon from his plate and nibbling on the toasted bread, thickly spreading it with the strawberry preserves as she chatted about the opera, or more specifically the gowns worn by the ladies attending the opera.

 

It was all very comfortable but after a time Rhett stopped listening to Scarlett as she prattled on, his thoughts lost in how things had changed so dramatically since yesterday. She had told him she loved him, she had shown her love to him but still there was one final dragon to be slain – he didn't want to break the happiness he felt or what Scarlett had given him, yet the dragon rose up strong and he had to kill it before he could be fully satisfied.

“Darling, do you remember the vows we made at our wedding?” Rhett said, breaking into Scarlett's soliloquy of the latest fashions.

“What? Yes, of course.”

“Remind me.”

“For better for worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer..” Scarlett began. “something about honour and obey. Why?”

“And do you remember when I so precipitously swept you off your feet and made you say yes to my proposal?”

“I don't know what prec.. precib.. but yes, I remember, though it seems like a dream now.” Scarlett smiled at him, her dimples dancing.

Rhett pushed his empty plate away and pulled out a cigarillo, striking a match to it, he puffed for a minute.

“Do you also remember you told me you were marrying me for my money?”

“I said I was marrying you partly for your money. Are you going to hold that against me now? I was being truthful at the time.” Scarlett said, a look of confusion clouded her face.

“What if....” Rhett began. “What if I wasn't quite so rich anymore? Would you still have me, would it still be for richer or poorer?”

“What are you saying, Rhett? Are you telling me you have no money?” Scarlett laughed, relieved that Rhett was simply teasing her. “Why you are a cad after all, marrying a poor widow woman under false pretences.”

Rhett drew on the cigarillo and slowly blew out the smoke.

Scarlett waited for him to grin, to give some witty retort but Rhett stayed mute, his face a blank canvas.

“You are teasing me.” she said. “Don't be silly, Rhett- why you have millions.”

Her smile faded when Rhett looked away from her.

“You really are telling me you have no money?”

Rhett shrugged.

“Well, how much do you have?”

“I'm not exactly sure...” Rhett said.

Scarlett lowered the toast back on to the plate and sat quietly as she tried to take in this news.

Rhett watched her, saw her mind clicking over. He waited for her reaction but when it came, it wasn't what he expected.

She stood up from her chair and moved to him. Sitting on his lap, she nestled her head against his chest and stroked his hand.

“Well, I guess we'll have to think of what we need to do.” Scarlett said. “ I have a bit of money put aside, I have seven hundred and twenty-three dollars tucked in a few hiding places at Aunt Pitty's. We can sell one of the mills, that should bring in at least a thousand dollars and then there is the saloon, I could raise the rent twenty dollars a week and ...” Scarlett paused. Slowly she continued, “ And there is Tara – I'm sure we could get a mortgage of fifteen hundred at least.”

Rhett pushed Scarlett back so he could look at her. “You would mortgage Tara for me?”

“For us, yes.” Scarlett said plainly.

She looked up at him. “You won't default on the mortgage, will you Rhett? I know you are too smart - this is just some kind of set back. You will be soon back on top, won't you? But if Tara needs to be mortgaged, can we pay that debt off first? I know you think of it some old farm but.. Tara is special to me.”

Rhett held her tightly. Nothing she could have said would have meant more to him - she was willing to gamble with Tara for him. He needed no further proof she loved him - loved and trusted in him more than anything in the world, even Tara.

“I love you, Scarlett, more now than even five minutes ago.” He kissed her with all his love and then said, “Put your mind at rest, darling. I don't need you to sell a mill or mortgage Tara. I have more than enough money to keep you in diamonds and furs 'til the end of our days.”

“So you aren't poor?” Scarlett's eyebrows knit together. “Was this some kind of test, you were trying to trick me to see if I loved you only for your money?”

Rhett looked slightly shamefaced when he said, “Can you blame me?”

Scarlett was about to answer resoundingly “Yes!” but she bit back her temper when she looked at him, his face tinged with worry.

“I should, why it was you that brought up how you were such a great catch with all your money. I remember thinking I could lie but I knew you would see through me so I told you the truth. Money does makes things better, you can't say it doesn't but now, you could be begging on the street and I would still love you.”

“Well let's hope you will never have to prove your words. Friends again?” Rhett said, his black eyes sparking.

“Friends and lovers.” Scarlett grinned back.

“Hmmm what a delightful combination. Now I think you said something about expecting me to buy you two dresses today, shall we make it three?”

Scarlett's eyes brightened at the thought, there was any number of dresses she had seen last night she wanted but instead she said, “New dresses would be fine but Rhett can I ask for something else?”  
Rhett nuzzled against her sweet smelling hair. “Anything, anything at all.”

“Will you take me home, Rhett?” Scarlett softly asked.

Rhett looked at her. “Aren't you happy here, Scarlett?”

“I'm happier than any time in my life and I love it here in San Francisco but I want to go home. I want to take you to Tara, to show you my home. I want you to meet Will Benteen and see all he has done for Tara. I want to walk with you through the woods and show you the fields of cotton. I can even show you the trees I used to climb when I was young if the Yankees didn't cut them down for firewood. Will you take me?”

“We'll make the travel arrangements today when we are dress shopping.” Rhett nuzzled his lips against Scarlett's neck. “Are you wanting us to move to Clayton County?”

“Oh no, I just want a visit for a spell. Then we can go back to Atlanta.”

“And where will we stay in Atlanta? I tell you right now, I have no interest in living with your Aunt Pitty, not that I think Uncle Peter would ever allow a scallywag to sully the Hamilton home.”

“I don't know – I haven't thought that far ahead.”

“I, in my loverlike excitement of our nuptials, bought a property on Peachtree Street, near the Leyland place. How would that suit you?”

“You mean build a house of our own?”

“Yes, we can design it and have it built. I am pretty sure we can get the lumber wholesale, I happen to know a sawmill owner.” Rhett grinned and tickled Scarlett.

“Can it be as big as I like?”

“As big as you like. But I insist that we design it together because you, my pet, have atrocious taste.”

Scarlett's face clouded and she stood up from Rhett's lap, moving away from him.

“Don't call me that, Rhett.”

“Call you what?”

“Don't call me your pet – I'm not a pet. I'm your wife.”

Rhett stood and went to her. “You are my love and I will never call you that again, I promise.”

“And don't call me sugar, either.”

“Should I be making notes of what not to call you?”

Scarlett smiled up at him. “No, I think that's about it.”

“Then, my life's dream, kiss me.”

And Scarlett willingly obeyed.

 

They had arrived at the ferry terminal with fifteen minutes to spare and Rhett was pleased with his forethought of setting all the clocks forward by half an hour. Scarlett seemed to think that time meant nothing when she was deciding on what dress to wear or how her hair should be styled.

Thankfully their trunks had been sent the night before so her dress choices were limited but she still needed to say her good-byes to Alice and Mrs. Jenkins, thanking them for their kindness.

Scarlett also insisted on giving her thanks to Chin who presented her with a seedling of a sequoia pine to plant in Georgia as a reminder of San Francisco.

Scarlett promised to send him a good Georgia pine to plant.

 

The last six days had been a whirlwind for Scarlett. They had been packed with dress fittings, teas, dinners and a ball given by Athena and Steven. Scarlett had also been lost in the wonder of Rhett's love and they had spent hours together, sharing their love, their bodies and their secrets.

One night, after lovemaking, Scarlett had shyly told Rhett about her dream on the ship and Rhett said, “I wish I had known that sooner.”

“Why?”

“Because I wouldn't have had to sleep on that sofa downstairs. There is one spring in it that seemed to enjoy digging into my back every night.”

Rhett held her closer to him. “I had thoughts along the same line as you when we were on board. I wanted you but I needed you to be the one to come to me.”

“We are both stubborn, aren't we Rhett.”

“Stubborn as mules. We prove Mammie's theory.”

“Tell me your dream about me.”

“It was much like yours.” Rhett said. “Though with a bit more detail.”

“Did I kiss you like this?” Scarlett touched her lips to his neck.

“I don't remember..” Rhett drawled.

“Well, did I touch you here?” Scarlett ran her fingers down to Rhett's belly.

“Or was it here?” Her hand moved along Rhett's leg.

“It is coming back to me now, you touched me here.” Rhett took Scarlett's hand and lead it towards his dream.

Scarlett gave an earthy chuckle. “I think we need to share our dreams more often.”

 

Athena, Grace and the children had come along to see them on to the train from Oakland and the children were beside themselves with excitement.

The steam powered ferry made quick work of the Bay and they landed at the train station within minutes. It was crowded with people and goods being shipped east but a porter was on hand to show them to the private car Rhett had reserved. Scarlett had questioned him on such an expense but he explained, “Simply one of the bonuses for owning stock with the Union Pacific, shareholders have free passage and I like to travel in comfort. I also want to be able to kiss my wife whenever I have the urge – I couldn't do that in a public car, that wouldn't be gentlemanly behaviour.

“As if that ever stopped you from doing what you want!” Scarlett laughed.

 

 

The party were impressed with the sumptuous fittings of the car and the children were fascinated with the divan that folded out to become a very comfortable bed. They kept changing it back and forth until Rhett suggested they may like to see Jupiter, the enormous steam engine that was pulling the train.

The ladies settled Scarlett into the car, arranging the flowers that Athena had thoughtfully brought and storing away the special Ghiraradelli chocolates that the children had spent their pocket money on just for Scarlett.

Scarlett wouldn't have a maid on the train so they busily helped her unpack, exclaiming at the inventive compactness of the storage areas.

Scarlett was relieved to see three long boxes addressed with her name were already stowed atop the brass railed shelf in the small dressing room. Rhett had paid double the price to ensure her beautiful dresses would be finished in six days.

Too quickly, they heard the call from the conductor. “Five Minutes, Five Minutes 'til Departure for the Overland Express!”

“Oh dear, where are Rosie and Rex?” Grace said.

“No doubt they are trying to stow away in the coal car to avoid their tutor.” Athena teased.

The ladies linked arms around Scarlett and they hugged. Scarlett felt teary, she had been so caught up with dress fittings, teas, dinners and the wonder of Rhett's love she hadn't thought how much she was going to miss Athena and Grace.

“No tears now Scarlett otherwise I will end up bawling.” Athena said.

“I will miss you both.”

“We will write and beg you to come back. You are always welcome you know.” Grace said.

“And you will always be welcome to stay with us in Atlanta, well when we get our house built.”

“I can't wait to see it and to meet Wade and Ella and of course your dear friend Mrs. Wilkes.” Grace replied.

“And your Tara too. We shall come for a long Southern visit the minute you ask.” Athena smiled.

“I can never thank you enough for all you did for me.” Scarlett said.

“Oh Mother, Jupiter is ever so big and shiny!” said Rosie as she burst into the carriage with Rex and Rhett. “Why are you all crying?”

“Because our friends are leaving, sweet girl and we shall miss them.”

“Oh Mrs. Butler,I think I will cry now too!” Rosie hugged Scarlett tightly.  
“I won't.” said Rex, though his lip seemed to be quivering. “Boys don't cry.”

Scarlett bent down to him. “Well my Rex, I shall cry for missing you. May I give you a kiss good-bye?”

With a blushing face, Rex nodded and Scarlett kissed him on his cheek which made the young boy's face redden all the more.

The train gave a sudden lurch and the conductor called again.

“All aboard!”

With a flurry, the ladies hugged Scarlett and Athena took Rhett's hand. “You take care of our girl Rhett, otherwise you will have the wrath of Grace and I upon you.”

Rhett smiled. “I promise I will. Thank you ladies, I don't know how I can repay you for all you have done.”

“Bring her back to us soon.” Grace said. “That will be ample payment.”

They stepped down from the train carriage and stood waving good bye as the train slowly drew away from the platform.

Rhett smiled at Scarlett and lightly stroked away the tears on her cheeks.

“Ready for our next adventure?” he softly said.

Scarlett looked up at him. “You mean our return to Atlanta? I can just imagine what the old cats will have to say about us. We are the height of bad form.”

“Because we are scallywags and mules?”

“No, because we are a husband and wife who love each other. That isn't how it is done in polite society according to you.”

Rhett laughed.

“Then let's make them talk till the cows come home.”

“I think that sounds fine to me Captain Butler.”

 

And their fun truly began.

 

 

 

 

* Quote from Margaret Mitchell's Gone With The Wind

 
    
    
      _**So there you go – I have fussed and bothered over this last chapter for months now and I have gotten to the point of not knowing if it is  good or a hot mess.  I do hope you enjoyed my what-if of Scarlett and Rhett's honeymoon.  I have a couple of ideas for an epilogue but if it ever gets written I can guarantee it won't be for a very long time.  Thank you so much for your comments and the many kudos, they are   always such a treat to receive.  Sincerely Rubeanddodo  
    ** PS A nod and a wink to noagnes for her honest criticism.  It was a great help.
      _
    

 


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